educate me - difference betwen Bty call and Affair intimacy

[Mount]

Pls educate me - difference between Booty call and Affair intimacy? Let us say the Affair intimacy only happens once a week or once every two weeks based the married person's situation/reality, so for the OW, what is the difference betwen Booty call and Affair intimacy? Doesn't the weekly intimacy seem to be booty call?

 

What is your perspective?

[stillwater]

I think it depends a lot more on the emotions involved, than on the frequency. MW and I talked, exchanged countless emails, and did things together other than just sex, so it wasn't a booty call type of thing at all. I would say you'd know if it wasn't a booty call, so if you think it was, it probably was.

[MissBee]

The difference is intimacy, and I mean emotional intimacy and not intimacy as a euphemism for sex.

 

A booty call in my opinion is purely about sex, where that person is out of sight, out of mind until you all are ready for your next fix.

 

An affair IMO, includes elements of emotional intimacy and the affair partners sharing feelings, emotions, doing things that people would otherwise do in a normal relationship.

 

I've been involved with committed men twice, one I consider more of a booty call. It went on for about a year. But it was on and off. We didn't have emotional intimacy. We didn't call to chit chat or text about our lives and feelings. We only texted or IMed casually. When he was out of sight, he was out of mind. I did not love him or think about him in a lovey-dovey way. Even if he was single I would have never been in a relationship with him.

 

I consider my other AP a true affair, as I was emotionally invested, as was he...which of course is what made it complicated and hurtful.

[Emme]

Pls educate me - difference between Booty call and Affair intimacy? Let us say the Affair intimacy only happens once a week or once every two weeks based the married person's situation/reality, so for the OW, what is the difference betwen Booty call and Affair intimacy? Doesn't the weekly intimacy seem to be booty call?

 

What is your perspective?

 

They both mean the same thing if someone is cumming. Booty call is you have a duty to perform. Affair intimacy... you might be able to get away with not performing.

[Happyface]

xMM and I did lots of things together apart from sex. We enjoyed doing all kinds of activities together. It was never just a sexual thing from the very beginning to the end.

 

 

I always thought a booty call was when somebody phoned you out of the blue and said can I come over for a quick ****.?

 

Maybe i am wrong, but that's my impression of it.

 

Happyface.

[Summer Breeze]

xMM and I did lots of things together apart from sex. We enjoyed doing all kinds of activities together. It was never just a sexual thing from the very beginning to the end.

 

 

I always thought a booty call was when somebody phoned you out of the blue and said can I come over for a quick ****.?

 

Maybe i am wrong, but that's my impression of it.

 

Happyface.

 

As far as I'm concerned you are absolutely wrong. As the others have said a booty call is when it's all sex and no emotion. Most As are not that way.

 

We lived a few hours away from each other so we saw didn't see each other often, but when we were together it was always for 3 or 4 day stretches. When we weren't together we usually spoke 3 or 4 times a day, texted and emailed loads too. The sex wasn't the draw and it wasn't what was tough to get over. Our intimacy was based on a relationship that evolved and grew, not based solely on sex.

[Summer Breeze]

They both mean the same thing if someone is cumming. Booty call is you have a duty to perform. Affair intimacy... you might be able to get away with not performing.

 

To most As 'affair intimacy' is 'relationship intimacy'. It does involve physical intimacy but that's not the be all and end all.

 

I do understand not all As are the same, as not all Ms are.

[Silly_Girl]

The key is INTIMACY.

 

You can have sex without true intimacy and intimacy without sex. From what I've seen here and IRL many affairs involve intimacy and are loving. Sometimes people who cheat choose to have one night stands or see prostitutes.

[Owl]

The key is INTIMACY.

 

You can have sex without true intimacy and intimacy without sex. From what I've seen here and IRL many affairs involve intimacy and are loving. Sometimes people who cheat choose to have one night stands or see prostitutes.

 

I agree...sort of.

 

Short term...this is true.

 

Longer term with someone who is somewhat sociopathic...possibly true.

 

But for most...one form of intimacy leads to it building in other areas.

 

Physical intimacy will often/normally lead to emotional intimacy. Emotional intimacy often leads to physical.

 

That's why most PA's eventually turn into EA/PA...and most EA's turn into EA/PA relationships.

 

So...short term...just a 'booty call' is possible for most. Longer/repeated events...usually become more than that.

 

And...I still classify it ALL as 'infidelity' if it's done without the spouse's knowledge and approval.

[Silly_Girl]

I agree...sort of.

 

Short term...this is true.

 

Longer term with someone who is somewhat sociopathic...possibly true.

 

But for most...one form of intimacy leads to it building in other areas.

 

Physical intimacy will often/normally lead to emotional intimacy. Emotional intimacy often leads to physical.

 

That's why most PA's eventually turn into EA/PA...and most EA's turn into EA/PA relationships.

 

So...short term...just a 'booty call' is possible for most. Longer/repeated events...usually become more than that.

 

And...I still classify it ALL as 'infidelity' if it's done without the spouse's knowledge and approval.

 

I know what you're saying, I do think there's some truth in the cliché that women fall for who they're f**king, but it's not a binary thing. I know a couple with barely any intimacy after ten years. Breaks my heart actually, but then I'm a romantic!

 

And yes, infidelity is infidelity, not sure anyone said different but I do agree.