John Stiles Posted July 30, 2012 Posted July 30, 2012 Attraction is very powerful. It blinds your judgment. It makes you feel like the other person is better than they might really be. It plays tricks on you. That's why I think it's important to have a list of standards, things that you want, things that your shouldn't tolerate, etc etc, based on your own personality, tastes, preferences and so on. That way, you can keep yourself down to earth and in touch with reality about that person. I have a list, which I'm still working on. Does anyone here have a list, even if it's not actually written down? You'll be surprised how much stuff you'll come up with once you start writing it all out.
Mme. Chaucer Posted July 30, 2012 Posted July 30, 2012 Attraction is very powerful. It blinds your judgment. It makes you feel like the other person is better than they might really be. It plays tricks on you. That's why I think it's important to have a list of standards, things that you want, things that your shouldn't tolerate, etc etc, based on your own personality, tastes, preferences and so on. That way, you can keep yourself down to earth and in touch with reality about that person. I have a list, which I'm still working on. Does anyone here have a list, even if it's not actually written down? You'll be surprised how much stuff you'll come up with once you start writing it all out. Is this a list of things you require in a woman you are wanting to have only a casual sexual relationship with? I hope it isn't very long.
Author John Stiles Posted July 30, 2012 Author Posted July 30, 2012 Is this a list of things you require in a woman you are wanting to have only a casual sexual relationship with? I hope it isn't very long. It's a general list. It can apply to anything. And yes it's very long but I'm trying to condense it and filter out that which isn't too important. But it's amazing how much you'd come up with if you brainstormed for a while.
Titanwolf Posted July 30, 2012 Posted July 30, 2012 Attraction makes it easy to equip those rose coloured glasses. I can't really relate to people who are swayed by their attraction to someone, so the only advice I could give is try to remain objective at all times? at least this way, you won't be fooled by lust.
spiderowl Posted July 31, 2012 Posted July 31, 2012 Yes, I have such a list, well a mental one. It is all about how the person behaves, how he treats me and others. It is about his values and capacity to love someone. I have seen men's lists on their dating profiles and some are pretty superficial. "A woman who likes to wear high heels", for example. Well, I guess it says a lot about his values! 1
Revolver Posted July 31, 2012 Posted July 31, 2012 If you can meet those standards? Absolutely. The problem is most people's "standards" are WAY to high. Especially for what there offering Also IMO, standards is what your used to. If I'm driving broken down pintos my whole life I can't say my "standard" is Porshes
boaaaar Posted July 31, 2012 Posted July 31, 2012 I have preferences, but no list set in stone besides cues about particularly obnoxious personality disorders.
Looks_Law Posted July 31, 2012 Posted July 31, 2012 (edited) Men want 3 things She must be NICE, NOT FAT and have a cute face. Women: He must be tall 1st and MOST important: 1)VERY good looking Have personality be funny share my interests, his dont matter kind charming Have a wide social circle well read Intellectually stimulating sexually satisfying Have a job Have a car Have money Spend money on me Give me money He must be flawless but not mind my flaws He should like animals He must want commitment He should express his feelings but not be too sensitive He must be sensitive He must be outgoing and a LEADER OF MEN He must have a fit athletic body and not mind if Im out of shape or overweight He must love me for my flaws, any flaw of his I refuse to deal with If he fails @ JUST one thing on this list he isnt my Mr.Perfect and I dont want him He must treat me as an equal He must be dominant and lead me He must know how to cook He must be well groomed He must be confident He must not be arrogant or an ******* He must not be too nice He must have a strong confident walk and handshake He must have his own place He must have ambition(money) I must be able to trust him. He musnt be rude He must be serious He must be fun loving and adventurous. again if he fails at any of these, most importantly number 1, I wont date him. Then Ill go cry about how lonely I am and how I cant find a man to be with. Edited July 31, 2012 by Looks_Law
Anela Posted July 31, 2012 Posted July 31, 2012 Men want 3 things She must be NICE, NOT FAT and have a cute face. That isn't true of all men. If you're talking anything more than casual, there will be issues where compatibility are concerned, surely.
Mme. Chaucer Posted July 31, 2012 Posted July 31, 2012 Men want 3 things She must be NICE, NOT FAT and have a cute face. Women: He must be tall 1st and MOST important: 1)VERY good looking Have personality be funny share my interests, his dont matter etc. etc. etc. So … how have you become the spokesperson for all women and what all women want? Guess what? All people are individuals. And you're better off letting them all speak for themselves. I'm pretty sure that in the long term relationships I've been in during my lifetime, I've brought quite a bit more to the table than lack of fat, niceness and a cute face. And are you sure this is all YOU want in a girlfriend? You don't need to trust her or be able to feel comfortable with her? You don't need to respect her or to find her sexy? You don't need to have similar values and ideas of how to have fun? REALLY? Just any nonfat, cute faced and "nice" person will do? Try a blow up doll! 1
Anela Posted July 31, 2012 Posted July 31, 2012 And are you sure this is all YOU want in a girlfriend? You don't need to trust her or be able to feel comfortable with her? You don't need to respect her or to find her sexy? You don't need to have similar values and ideas of how to have fun? REALLY? Just any nonfat, cute faced and "nice" person will do? Try a blow up doll! I started to get into that, but then realized that it would be a wasted effort.
Mme. Chaucer Posted July 31, 2012 Posted July 31, 2012 I started to get into that, but then realized that it would be a wasted effort. I know, I know. I'm tilting at windmills full force today.
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