Ani Posted July 27, 2012 Posted July 27, 2012 Hello guys was wondering if I could get some input. My girlfriend broke up with me about a week and a half ago only to get back with me and well break up with me again yesterday. I love her with every single part of me but after doing it again..I feel this hatred, anger towards her but I love her still. During our entire relationship I was the one who wanted us to work from being the one to flying to see her, to basically being her blanket. I loved every minute of our relationship just like she did. It was only after she went to India that she changed. They tried to kill her dad and get her married. After this events she broke up with me the first time. After a few days she wanted us to get back together. Only to break up with me because she sees me as a friend now. I know she loves me with all heart or else why would she have bought me a 200 dollar shirt that I've wanted for a while, and a promise ring that same day. She broke up with me. Her actions don't go with what she said. Anyways, she comes back home today from India and won't get here till tomorrow..on our anniversary. I know it will hit her hard since she won't be around her entire family. The thing is she wants to see me for the last time as do I. We had plan to see each other next week before the break up. I don't know what to do..I want to see her but I'd just hurt myself more. Yet I have this feeling that if we see one another she will regret it. It's obvious she loves me. After I see her I want to go NC. Just want to see her and take her out of my life. I deserve so much better than this. I did everything to make us work. What should I do when I see her? I.know Shes going to give me the shirt and the thing for my sisters, and she wants to see me for those 4 days. Should I give her the promise ring I bought her..or? IDK I just want to end this in good terms. I can't be her friend. I love her too much.
Author Ani Posted July 28, 2012 Author Posted July 28, 2012 Any advice guys? She won't go NC. She will find a way to talk to me ans I'm to weak to ignore her.
ladyabstrused Posted July 28, 2012 Posted July 28, 2012 I guess in your case, if she's not willingly wanting to break up and only breaking up because of her family, I don't see why you couldn't continue contact. I mean, I know, most people will probably say NC will help you move on. But.. you love her so much. If I were you.. in that position.. I'd hold on to it a bit more to see where it'd take me. I'm not saying this to have you have your hopes up high. You need to also know that nothing good might come out of it if you continue contact.. it might only hurt you more. But if it was me, I'd think it would be worth the hurt if I just let things go with the flow and see where it takes me. It all really depends on what you want. You say you can't be her friend cos you love her too much? I guess in a way that makes sense. But if you truly love her, wouldn't you want to be the friend who would be there for her to support her in times of need? I'm sure she's not going through an easy time the way you describe it.. with her dad and all that. Sorry you're going through such a difficult situation though. :\ Be strong, Ani. *hugs*
Author Ani Posted July 28, 2012 Author Posted July 28, 2012 I guess in your case, if she's not willingly wanting to break up and only breaking up because of her family, I don't see why you couldn't continue contact. I mean, I know, most people will probably say NC will help you move on. But.. you love her so much. If I were you.. in that position.. I'd hold on to it a bit more to see where it'd take me. I'm not saying this to have you have your hopes up high. You need to also know that nothing good might come out of it if you continue contact.. it might only hurt you more. But if it was me, I'd think it would be worth the hurt if I just let things go with the flow and see where it takes me. It all really depends on what you want. You say you can't be her friend cos you love her too much? I guess in a way that makes sense. But if you truly love her, wouldn't you want to be the friend who would be there for her to support her in times of need? I'm sure she's not going through an easy time the way you describe it.. with her dad and all that. Sorry you're going through such a difficult situation though. :\ Be strong, Ani. *hugs* Thank you lady, I know her way to well and it sucks. She says she doesn't love me, that she sees me as a friend but her actions don't show it. She said she doesnt want to see me but the following day she says she wants to. Shes afraid her family will disown her because of our relationship. Something I don't want to happen.I love her family even though I've never met them. I know that may sound dumb but It's true. She loves my family as well and has met them. She said she would say things to make me hate her if we ever broke up and she is saying rather hurtful things. But I know she doesnt mean them. I don't know how to act around her next week. Today is our anniversary of 2 years, and today she arrives home from india. I know she's thinking about me in her trip back. She should almost be home. When she gets home I'm sure it will hit her hard.
ladyabstrused Posted August 4, 2012 Posted August 4, 2012 Wow lol I just read your other post in the countdown thread. Glad to hear it's working out just well. Good luck, Ani. Hope things continue to be good for the both of you.
Author Ani Posted August 5, 2012 Author Posted August 5, 2012 (edited) Wow lol I just read your other post in the countdown thread. Glad to hear it's working out just well. Good luck, Ani. Hope things continue to be good for the both of you. Ha thanks. Just feels weird being back together. She's adding so many rules to it..idk how to take it. She wants to talk less because she started doing bad in school when we started dating, and other things. She told me sweet talking doesn't make a relationship, and that I've changed. That I used to think crying was for the weak. Only time I cried during our relationship was when she broke up with me. She's just a mess..blames me for everything. I changed because she was needy. She says I used to be career oriented, I am. I got my bachelors at 19. I have 3 years left until I get another bachelor degree. I am 20. Just wanted to get her more involved in my life. Guess I messed up there. Oh well. Talking to her used to be fun, used to make my day. Now it just upsets me more. Will see how it goes. Kinda getting tired of this ****. Edited August 5, 2012 by Ani no idea.
ladyabstrused Posted August 12, 2012 Posted August 12, 2012 Yikes. I see that you seem frustrated about it. Well, perhaps you should talk things out with her about the new rules. I mean, there must be a reason why she needs those rules there..and sometimes in relationships, if you really want to commit to the other, both will need to make a compromise or something. You shouldn't expect her to give her whole time to you if she can't, and vice versa, she can't expect you to be okay so quickly with the sudden changes. So talk about it and discuss things with her. Hope it works out for you really. Good luck, Ani!
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