Imajerk17 Posted July 27, 2012 Posted July 27, 2012 Do you ever find an older guy attractive? Maybe you don't want to actually date him and if he asked for your number you'd flake, but have you ever found yourself having 'that feeling' of chemistry in a conversation with a guy around 40 or older? I wonder because I was in line at a coffee shop. I was talking to this girl who is only 19--half my age! But she seemed to be enjoying herself. If she were 29 I would have gone for her number.
tina783 Posted July 27, 2012 Posted July 27, 2012 I'm 29 dating a 41 year old for 2 months. We have great chemistry and common interests so it works. I am definitely attracted to him as well. 1
Author Imajerk17 Posted July 27, 2012 Author Posted July 27, 2012 Yeah I know phennyphen. I just want someone who can remember where I put my dentures when I take them off. Can't a guy dream???
Author Imajerk17 Posted July 27, 2012 Author Posted July 27, 2012 I had an amazing date last year with a 26-year-old. It didn't work out. I saw her a couple months ago with another guy who looked a good 10 years older than I am! (And no it definitely was not her dad.)
poodle Posted July 27, 2012 Posted July 27, 2012 Yes, once. He was in great shape for his age though.
iris219 Posted July 27, 2012 Posted July 27, 2012 I thought you were in your late twenties for some reason. Had no idea you were 40. I was attracted to men 10 years older in my 20s. At 19, I thought men over 25 were gross.
Author Imajerk17 Posted July 27, 2012 Author Posted July 27, 2012 I thought you were in your late twenties for some reason. Had no idea you were 40. I was attracted to men 10 years older in my 20s. At 19, I thought men over 25 were gross. Thanks iris. I feel as if I am in my late 20's because (A) I'm in great physical shape. (B) I dated very little in my 20's and early 30's--a serious relationship after a long long dry spell. I'm in a male-dominated field and I was actually quite shy growing up. I pulled myself out of that by "making" myself do approaches though.
dreamingoftigers Posted July 27, 2012 Posted July 27, 2012 When I was in my teens/younger twenties I thought older men were very predatorial. It bothered me a lot and made them very unattractive to me. In my mid-later twenties, older men became more attractive but I was happily taken I think that older guys trying to get with a really young girl isn't cool. 2
pink_sugar Posted July 27, 2012 Posted July 27, 2012 I have a lot of friends older than me, mostly women in their 40's. I am very mature for my age and I have found older men cute, but I would never date someone twice my age. Maybe you have a lot in common, but when planning a long term relationship, there are other aspects to consider when factoring in the age difference. That said, I wouldn't date someone unless I was looking for a long term relationship. My dad dates women half his age or even younger and he's 50. I think it's gross. I couldn't fathom dating a guy close to my dad's age.
fishtaco Posted July 27, 2012 Posted July 27, 2012 Some do, some don't. I'm 41. I don't specifically go for younger women, my GF is actually several years older than I am. But before her, when I was single and hitting on a bunch of women, I've hit on a 25 year old. Nothing happened, because I didn't really go for it, somewhere in the back of my mind I felt like a creepy old dude and held myself back. But later on I think she hooked up with a guy that's older than me. So in the end, it wouldn't have mattered, it was all in my own head. Some women will think I'm predatory just because I have a penis. I really shouldn't let that get to me, and just do my thing. If I were still single that is.
danny in van Posted July 27, 2012 Posted July 27, 2012 I'm now 45 and I've met and ended up in bed with more good looking early 20 somethings in the last 2 yrs than ever in my (quite sexually prolific) life...'On paper' age differences seem to be deal breakers, but what happens is I just gravitate to good looking girls that give me an inviting look, and stuff happens (age comes up later if at all...) . It so happens that I get that look more from early mid 20s than 30s, so why would I fight to get with a 30 something ? ...They're (20s) more sexually eager I guess- and that's good enough for me! For those that say I shouldn't, well thankfully it's not for you to decide and ur opinion has no sway w me or them! I know it's partly due to that I'm militant about diet and exercise more than ever...AND that I don't care nearly as much whether it happens or not as when I was younger ( a big plus for sure as 'hot' girls used to frazzle me- not at all no mo'! hallelujah!...) AND as you age (or at least with me) my individuality/charisma has really grown, and I've done a ton of interesting pursuits, travels etc and can keep convo going all night- not as a chore , but I am an eloquent talker - and a listener too, because I do find most v interesting. Anyway, yes it does happen, but often the girl later says "i thought u were like mid 30s" so looks and fitness etc will determine alot of that -but $ has not played at all into it...no gifts or dinners etc before we get involved despite what alot will wanna say ' oh I bought her affection' haha- no way too frugal for that- and so far I haven't had to! 2
Disenchantedly Yours Posted July 27, 2012 Posted July 27, 2012 Due to a number of factors, when I was younger, I dated older guys. As I have gotten older, I am less interested in older men and more interested in men my own age. I find more of a connection with men my own age then older men. Looking back on it, most of the older guys I dated had their own set of issues which is probably why the targeted someone younger with less experience. My friends, the guys and girls, use to bust on me for dating the older guys. The older guys always wanted to tie me down real quick too. They would make comments that sure made it seem like they felt the pressure of their age. There was one older guy I did fall for but I think are ages was a big factor in it not working out. And it was always at the back of mind about how he would be concerning age as I got older. Dating older men isn't a great bet for younger women. I think it's creepy when men specifically target younger women are tout the virtues of younger women or feel extra good with a younger woman's attention. Rather then just ending up with one or dating one out of generally liking the person. I also find it funny when older guys put women their own age down. Whether you are an older woman or younger woman, this kind of man doesn't bode well either way. I certainly can say "hey that older guy is attractive" in a subjective sense but it doesn't mean I want him to touch me. Even if a girl is 29, dating someone 40 is a little.......different. 1
tigressA Posted July 27, 2012 Posted July 27, 2012 I'm 25 and I can't imagine myself falling for anyone more than 6 years older than me. I don't know the reason for that specific number...that's just the way it is. Even when I was with my ex who is just about 6 years older, I felt strange. He looked closer to my age but there were some instances where I actually noticed the age difference--mostly in bed. There were some times when he just couldn't keep up with me. I am incredibly grossed out when someone noticeably older (like 10+ years) makes a pass at me. Maybe it's the area I live in, but a lot of men I see who are 'older' just don't look good.
SmileFace Posted July 28, 2012 Posted July 28, 2012 I won't date anyone that is over 29 when we start dating.
dreamingoftigers Posted July 28, 2012 Posted July 28, 2012 I always stuck to that ratio: (age)/2+7=youngest you should go for. If I didn't fall in the older guy's range, forget it. I'm glad I did. No really nasty regrets, no married men. That's one thing about older guys that go after younger girls, a large percentage of them are married. Another thing I tried to do was make sure that mine and my partner's baggage "matched." For instance before I was married and had kids, I wouldn't want to get with someone that had been married or had kids. Too many dynamics that I hadn't experienced that could really mess up a relationship. Plus the dude SHOULD be putting his kids first, meaning that we wouldn't have that kind of "young relationship - grow together for each other stage." Now that I am married and have a child, if my h and I divorced or he got hit by a Mack truck or something, I wouldn't look for the single confirmed bachelor guy to try to understand and get into my dynamic.
Silly_Girl Posted July 28, 2012 Posted July 28, 2012 A close friend is 33 and she dates around 15+ yrs older than her, almost without fail. Daddy issues.
USMCHokie Posted July 28, 2012 Posted July 28, 2012 Daddy issues. Can it also be attributed to a girl wanting to feel "mature for her age"? I never quite understood the attraction...
eleanorhurting Posted July 28, 2012 Posted July 28, 2012 This past year I went on dates with men who were older but being 25, 35 is where I draw the line. I remember when I was younger in my teens there was this guy who I had a huge crush on. I thought he was so handsome. He was the older brother of a friend of mine. I was 17 and he was 31 and i thought he was sooo hot. 7 years later, at 24, this guy was 38 and we ran into each other. We started catching up and he became very, very interested. He would call me and ask me out on dates but for some reason I thought it was weird that someone 14 years older than me would try something with me. I did not even find him attractive anymore. He invited me to have dinner with him for his 39th birthday! I could never picture myself dating a 39 year old. But different people different strokes.
Silly_Girl Posted July 28, 2012 Posted July 28, 2012 Can it also be attributed to a girl wanting to feel "mature for her age"? I never quite understood the attraction... I think that's prevalent more in younger women dating men in their 30s rather than independent women with own house, job etc going for someone almost old enough to be their dad.
Recommended Posts