Brokendude Posted July 27, 2012 Posted July 27, 2012 After 2 weeks of pain and agony im slowly realizing that she did the righr thing and were not meant for each other, we r just too different, part of me even wants to tell her that to even thank her but i dot want to break Nc, maybe in time i feel ahe truly lovef me and we just couldnt make it work
Author Brokendude Posted July 27, 2012 Author Posted July 27, 2012 Sorry bout the typos im on my iphone, as soon as i finished typing this i started feeling anger for the first time, i felt ive been making excuses for her during this breakup ive never been mad one bit, abdni read in a book that if u suppress the anger one can neer move on, it says we have to feel all the emotions fully to get over it, and this post madr me realize one of the gapong hole in our relationship, i still make excuses for her and let her treat me like crap, i feel angry now and in a weird way it feels great so i take that first post back, omg does anyone have a take on my messy mind rt now
KatZee Posted July 27, 2012 Posted July 27, 2012 Sorry bout the typos im on my iphone, as soon as i finished typing this i started feeling anger for the first time, i felt ive been making excuses for her during this breakup ive never been mad one bit, abdni read in a book that if u suppress the anger one can neer move on, it says we have to feel all the emotions fully to get over it, and this post madr me realize one of the gapong hole in our relationship, i still make excuses for her and let her treat me like crap, i feel angry now and in a weird way it feels great so i take that first post back, omg does anyone have a take on my messy mind rt now Same here. I made excuses for my ex for almost three years. I did love him so I tried justifying certain actions, excusing him because he had gone through a lot in life, I said he worked too hard, was stressed out, etc etc etc. None of that matters. None of that gives anyone the right to treat you like a pile of sh*t. Your mind isn't messy. You're finally just seeing the relationship for what it was. Not the perfection you thought it was, but a dysfunctional, unhealthy, toxic and draining one. It took me about a month to get to the anger you're describing, but I can tell you that once the anger hit, it didn't leave for a LONG time. I've been two months in the anger stage. I don't switch between any other emotion for him so I know this is the last thing to get through before I'm COMPLETELY over it... only the last 2 days have I realized I don't feel the intense anger of the past two months so it must be finally running its course. I would wake up pissed. I would curse him out in my mind all day long. I would be shaking my head in disgust, I think one of my older posts on here is "How Do I Get Past the Anger?!!?" I realized that although I was extremely angry at him... I was more angry with MYSELF. Angry because I allowed him to treat me the way he did, and instead of standing up for myself, instead of leaving him when I should have, I made excuses. I continued loving him. I continued trying, and giving him my all. It's MY fault that I wound up the one being dumped. I stayed when I shouldn't have. Once I realized that it was myself I was angry at, I started focusing on what I should have done, the red flags I should have seen, and I learned that no one else will ever get free passes to be ungrateful, selfish, disrespectful or a liar and cheater again. 1
Author Brokendude Posted July 27, 2012 Author Posted July 27, 2012 Hey kat u nailed it!!!! Thats how i feel now, its so sad that even when she dumps me im looking and making up excuses for her!!! Screw her, i am mad she led me on and im mad at myself for sure for not seeing this while i was in the relationship, looking back i feel i was nothing but an emotional buffer for her i dont remember her going out of her way to show me love i truly feel anger for the first time
Canadian731 Posted July 27, 2012 Posted July 27, 2012 There shouldn't need to be any excuses in a breakup, somewhere a long the way atleast one persons feelings changed, I find that a lot of the time it's GIGS, just keep up NC and you will go through all the stages of grief, grieving the death of a relationship is just as dealing with the death of someone close. It takes time, usually a lot longer then one would hope but you will live to love again, good luck 1
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