I can afford to travel, boyfriend can't....do I still go? Continued...

[kaylan]

I am in love with my work like how some people are in love with their wives/husbands. I already know in my heart I will never love a man as much as my work.

Tbh, I only think you can say this because I dont think youve felt that true love for a man before. True romantic passionate love.

 

Sure having passion for your work is nice and all, but I personally dont think it compares to the passion shared between two loving people.

 

Before I lowered my standards, this is exactly the kind of man I was looking for. What happened?

 

I was accused of having standards too high, being a gold digger (because I want a man with money so he can travel) and apparently wanting a good looking guy is "unrealistic".

Its not unrealistic or high standards to want a guy whos attractive, has a good head on his shoulders, and has a decent career.

 

However, it is gold digging to me if a girl wants a guy to have a hot shot career so he can spend money globe trotting. Lets be real...youre not concerned with him just spending money on travel....and what man wants a girls love for him to be conditional on his ability to travel a lot?

That's why i'm not dating "studs that make a good living". If that's what I look for, I am put down for being so many nasty things that i'm not. And these accusations are mostly from men.

What does their money have to do with the person they are? You should fall in love with the person...their money shouldnt have anything to do with that. Money can be gone in a flash.

Then they blame women for settling for them when they aren't what she wants. Apparently what she wants makes her "entitled" and she is put down by any man who isn't her ideal (which are most because everyone's ideal is different).

Theres a difference between compromising on some standards and meeting someone who makes you happy in every way, and settling for someone who doesnt meet your standards and whom youre not completely happy with.

 

Your bf is the latter, and from previous threads posters here we already know youd leave him if you found a better deal. Heck, youve all but outright said this yourself before. THATS why people hate settling.

 

Those who compromise on a few things, yet find someone they truly love, wouldnt trade that person up for someone "better". Those people are truly committed. You arent, in my opinion, based on your past posts.

So why am I dating him? Because if I don't, I will be the single b*tch who wants a man who doesn't exist because these days, men want to be loved for things other than what they can afford to do and how they look.

So youre only dating him because you dont want to be single? Oh wow...thats great for him Like Ive told you in the past, I find your relationship selfish, and I feel for the guy.

 

Men do want to be loved for other things besides material bull-ish. Everyone wants to be loved for the person they are. Money can be gone in a flash....and then what? A chick who was with you because of money will not be loyal when the cash is gone.

 

The girl whos with you because she finds you sexy, smart, funny, and emotionally connected to her will stick by your side.

They don't realize that a woman wants a powerful, successful and good looking man. These things are only "unrealistic" because most men are poor, fat slobs who don't know how to take care of themselves and their life.

Most men are poor, fat slobs? Wow....just wow. Thats not even close to the truth. Actually most men are average, decent, middle class guys in my experience.

 

Look, its 2012....and gone are the times where every single woman is digging for the most powerful guy she can get because she cant provide for herself. And define success for me....is it a specific income bracket? In my eyes successful is being able to take care of yourself and live comfortably (not paycheck to paycheck)....which isnt super rare.

 

Nowadays plenty of girls want a guy they are truly in love with. And you know what? A guy who can love a girl the right way, and protect her the way a man should....thats a powerful man. And smart women hold onto that.

 

At the end of the day, though I have big rock star dreams, and also aspirations to travel as a professional businessman, Id gladly play open mic nights for the rest of my days after getting off of work from a typical corporate desk job if it meant that Id run into the woman who makes me feel like a truly powerful man for having made her mine.

 

Thats the better life for me, because at least then Id have real love. Who needs the more glamorous crap if it means Im going to have to deal with women who are primarily with me for the wrong reasons, or who may bail on me if our lifestyle at all changes.

 

No thanks.

Edited July 26, 2012 by kaylan

[rhymes]

Never lower your standards. I'd rather be single the rest of my life and happy, than settle because society wants me to "settle" or I feel I need to find a partner or get sick of being single.

 

She doesn't have to be 10/10 and perfect in every aspect. But if she doesn't rock my world in a number of key categories, it's not worth my time.

 

I'd suggest you adopt the same attitude - being single is awesome, why settle for the sake of settling?

 

Kudos to you for wanting to go travel and not let your partner hold you back. You only get one chance to live, and so you've got to make the most of each day and opportunity. I wouldn't even think twice about going - sometimes you need to be selfish and do things for you, because at the end of the day, that's all you have is you.

 

Also, there are guys who are good looking, successful and single - I'd say keep playing the field until you find "the one".

[2sure]

To the question -

 

If you can afford to travel and your boyfriend cannot.

Bring him and pay his way if you want him with you.

 

Or Dont. Do what makes your vacation happiest.

 

His having money or not can most certainly be an issue...but only you can decide if and when it is.

 

I enjoy men who can afford toys, vacations, etc. Always have. I have no qualms about it.

BUT. If I am enjoying a man that cannot afford those things, and it makes me happy to be with him, and I can afford it...I would have zero qualms taking him on vacation.

 

Im actually considering just such a situation right now.

[brahmabull117]

 

Before I lowered my standards, this is exactly the kind of man I was looking for. What happened?

 

I was accused of having standards too high, being a gold digger (because I want a man with money so he can travel) and apparently wanting a good looking guy is "unrealistic".

 

That's why i'm not dating "studs that make a good living". If that's what I look for, I am put down for being so many nasty things that i'm not. And these accusations are mostly from men.

 

 

Who gives a f*ck what others have to say?

 

 

Go after what you want and it's clearly not your boyfriend. If you're capable of getting a good looking stud, then do it. F*ck the haters. Go the gym and look for good looking guys who come dressed in nice business outfits. Initiate conversation with them and go out on dates. There's the easy solution to all your problems

 

 

Also good looking high earning men don't exist? I'll be making six figures before I'm 30. Several of my buddies are in the same group. Trust me, we do exist

 

 

Not to say that you have to go after a guy like me who wants to be a millionaire, but plenty of guys out there have steady jobs and they have money left over for things like traveling, so why even bother with the poor guys?

Edited July 26, 2012 by brahmabull117

[kaylan]

To the question -

 

If you can afford to travel and your boyfriend cannot.

Bring him and pay his way if you want him with you.

 

Or Dont. Do what makes your vacation happiest.

 

His having money or not can most certainly be an issue...but only you can decide if and when it is.

 

I enjoy men who can afford toys, vacations, etc. Always have. I have no qualms about it.

BUT. If I am enjoying a man that cannot afford those things, and it makes me happy to be with him, and I can afford it...I would have zero qualms taking him on vacation.

 

Im actually considering just such a situation right now.

Awww that makes you a sweetheart.

 

If a girl ever did that for me, shed get ridiculous love made to her every night of that vacation.

 

And I agree with everything you said. Its cool to be able to afford to buy nice things and do nice things, but if a girl makes my heart swell, Im not going to not be with her just because she has less funds than I. I obviously like her for very good reasons, so Id want her to be on vacation with me.

[denise_xo]

I am in love with my work like how some people are in love with their wives/husbands. I already know in my heart I will never love a man as much as my work.

 

I wouldn't phrase it exactly like this, but I feel the same. So if that's how you feel, I think your decision to travel is pretty simple.

[Radu]

I am Estonian.

 

Just because I am in love with my work doesn't mean I don't crave companionship and a relationship.

 

Just because people are in love with their partners doesn't mean they should "not work" because they don't love it as much.

 

You mentioned before.

 

However, Estonia has a pretty significant Russian minority there, around 30% of the population if i'm not mistaken.

 

So, are you Russian [the minority], or not ?

Do you have Russians in your immediate family ?

 

It's ok if you don't want to answer.

[William]

I guess we're done here.