Corgi Posted July 26, 2012 Posted July 26, 2012 My LDR boyfriend and I were together for 8 months, but we knew each other for just over a year. I lived in AZ and he lived in IL. He was intimidated by me even when we met-- I would make him stutter and he got so nervous he got lost in the baggage claim trying to find the parking lot. He said I was so amazing and he was so lucky to find such a perfect girl and he wanted me to be by his side in life and show me off to his family. He has always been very attentive and we moved fairly slow, I didn't rush anything and he didn't either. We have seen each other often and I have met some of his family. He always respected me and never mistreated me. We had great connection, communication, similar but different interests and we were planning for our future when we both could live together. He made me a handmade gift, it took him two weeks to make (a winter hat) and was so romantic. He moved back in with his mother this year to take one semester break from school and earn some money. He agreed to keep paying rent at his old apartment because his brother was also his roommate and they couldn't hold it without him. It took him a while to get a job, but he finally got one in March. At first things were still pretty good, his hours started to increase and one month after he even got employee of the month. He had to pay a few doctor bills and vet bills on top of the rent, he would go to the store and buy food and cook a few meals for his mom. We would regularly skype for breakfast and sometimes at night. He started to complain that he is more broke now that he is earning money then when he was in school with his brother with no job. In may he didn't have much time to spend time with me, he would get home late and have really awkward hours. He told me all that month how much he missed me so much because we hadn't had a chance to see each other in person because of how expensive the tickets were this summer. If we got a chance to skype, sometimes I had to leave early and he look just so incredibly sad. He started to not communicate as much, and after a few weeks of low contact I asked him if things are OK? He would say Yes but that he was so tired all the time and **** went down at work. His brother quit his job so he had to cover both parts of the rent. He also said that he wasn't sleeping very well and that he was in a bad mood all the time. He didn't mean to seem distant and he wasn't trying to break up with me. His mother would text me and tell me that she had to go into his work just to say hi to him and that he was a grump to her. He stopped making her dinners and I think she was worried he was being like that to me as well. His birthday came and he thanked me for his gift and told me he loved me and goodnight. That was the last I have ever heard from him. His mother started to text me saying that I should move on and that he is just like his father, how he will just ignore me make me miserable, that he is ungrateful and she was pissed off at him, she hurt him by sending his fathers birthday gift back (divorced). I tried to call him and sent him text messages for a couple of days (not spamming tho) but no response. And about a week after that she told me that it was over and she was sorry I was in so much pain. I asked her if she would send me my things I have left there and she told me she would ask him to gather them and she would send them back to me herself. Since then I have no tried to contact him and he hasn't tried to contact me either. Its been a little over a month since all this happened. I still have no received my things. I would like to get him back, but I don't really understand what might be going on. I didn't tell him that I bought a ticket for August (was super cheap but only in august) and I'm unsure if I should go. If I did, I'll obviously be very tempted to see him and get an answer but I don't know how to go about it -- if anything I can get some type of closure. Advice on what might have happened, if this is salvageable or if the worst, how to get my stuff back? (very expensive things, and one inexpensive item.. my winter kermit hat with the broken eye he kept so he could fix for me)
justwhoiam Posted July 29, 2012 Posted July 29, 2012 The only thing you should try to save is the money you put in the plane ticket. See if the airline can convert it to a different flight. Maybe you can have a holiday with a friend. Call her mother and tell her you're sending a carrier to pick up your things (DHL, UPS, FedEx... see what's cheaper and more convenient to you). Then you arrange the pick up. You'll find someone else who is better. I know it's not easy when you're head over heels in love... but you can't do that to yourself. So you MUST move on.
Recommended Posts