writergal Posted July 24, 2012 Posted July 24, 2012 Ok peeps, here is it. My OLD profile (ducks to avoid tossed produce and small un-vaccinated animals). I won't post the entire profile. Just the parts I think need feedback. You'll notice I took the verbose-mundane-as-breakfast-cereal route instead of the quippy, witty with puns path. Help me lighten up (hah!) My Self Summary "Four be the things I am wiser to know: Idleness, sorrow, a friend, and a foe. Four be the things I'd been better without: Love, curiosity, freckles, and doubt. Three be the things I shall never attain: Envy, content, and sufficient champagne. Three be the things I shall have till I die: Laughter and hope and a sock in the eye.” - Dorothy Parker I'm really good at Assembling particle board furniture, ever since my college days. Sometimes I think I should have gone into carpentry, pottery, or wood carving as I like working with my hands. I DVR a lot of home design shows on the HGTV Network. Property Brothers, Income Property and 24 Hour Design are a few of my favorites. Board games. Scrabble, Apples to Apples, Monopoly, Trival Pursuit, Pictionary. The nerd in me loves board games and the card game cribbage. I honed my card playing skills in college with my friends who easily fit the Reality Bites film character stereotypes. Organizing. I love interior design and have helped friends create more space from less in their homes. In addition to my green thumb, I have a third eye for how to utilize space. I believe in the concepts of feng shui and try to use those in my own living space. Just call me the clutter buster! Cooking and Baking. My recipes are inspired by a lot of the shows I watch on The Food Network, a total guilty pleasure of mine. Giada at Home, Barefoot Contessa, Cupcake Wars give me a lot of great recipe ideas. Living in the now. Life is short. There's no time to waste. I'm happy with myself and where I'm at in life. I keep myself open to new experiences, and have a diverse set of friends. There's a quote I read somewhere that says, "Life is a great big canvas; throw all the paint you can on it." Basically, don't waste opportunities that come your way. Try to experience as much of what life has to offer while you can. This is pretty much my life philosophy in a nutshell. Favorite books, movies, shows, music, food. Movies. I'm a huge movie buff. I used to write movie reviews for broadcast radio and print. I love Woody Allen films, like Midnight In Paris and To Rome With Love. I attend a lot of film festivals during the year locally like MSP-IFF, and regulary Cinema Lounge screenings at the Bryant Lake Bowl. I love Italian and French films. Plus, I have Netflix streaming, so I like to watch a lot of films that way. Books. Before grad school I interviewed a lot of writers for a weekly literary arts radio show on community radio. My favorite genres are crime fiction and suspense, historical fiction, travel memoir, memoir, biography, short story and science fiction. Feel free to ask me for specific titles. I have about six bookcases full of books. Live Comedy shows. This is probably my favorite thing to do on a date or out with friends. I love going to see live comedy shows, attend open mic nights around the Twin Cities during the week and have participated in a few open mics myself as well as doing comedy improv on stage with Comedy Sportz in college for a few years. Music. Ok Go, Coldplay, Toe, Clock Opera, Terramara, Zoe Keating, Imogen Heap, Komeda, The Fashion, the band French Films, Bombay Bicycle Club, Duran Duran, U2, The Pixies, The Cardigans, 10,000 Maniacs, The Spilt Canvas, The New Amsterdams, So Percussion, ABBA, Queen, Journey, Gerry Rafferty, Rolling Stones, Bare Naked Ladies, Arto Lindsey, The Beatles, Break of Reality, Kimbra, Gotye, David Bowie, Dave Mathews, The Drums, Prince, The Suburbs, Tori Amos, Foo Fighters, Fleetwood Mac and Foster the People. 4
MrCastle Posted July 24, 2012 Posted July 24, 2012 Not sure if I would use a quote from someone else as my self summary
veggirl Posted July 24, 2012 Posted July 24, 2012 :love::love: EXCEPT the quote at the beginning. but other than that the "witty, quirky" stuff drives me bonkers and is suitable for early 20s looking to get laid and look cool but not beyond that IMO. (and I LOVE barefoot contessa ) 1
Cracker Jack Posted July 24, 2012 Posted July 24, 2012 I'm not an expert when it comes to dating profiles, but I think your OLD profile is put together nicely. 3
Author writergal Posted July 24, 2012 Author Posted July 24, 2012 I love Dorothy Parker and thought I was being "clever" by using her poetry as my life summary. My "what I'm doing with my life" section is pretty extensive, so I thought, hmm, I'll grab the smart guys attention with the D. Parker poem. I don't want to write a boring self summary, which seems rather common with a lot of the OLD men's profiles I've come across. Some of them barely fill that section out. What impression does the D. Parker poem give men about me? I'm in grad school to be a language arts teacher, so I want to attract men who are creative, who read, and who I wouldn't have to bribe to go with me to see a play or independent or foreign film.
MrCastle Posted July 24, 2012 Posted July 24, 2012 I love Dorothy Parker and thought I was being "clever" by using her poetry as my life summary. My "what I'm doing with my life" section is pretty extensive, so I thought, hmm, I'll grab the smart guys attention with the D. Parker poem. I don't want to write a boring self summary, which seems rather common with a lot of the OLD men's profiles I've come across. Some of them barely fill that section out. What impression does the D. Parker poem give men about me? I'm in grad school to be a language arts teacher, so I want to attract men who are creative, who read, and who I wouldn't have to bribe to go with me to see a play or independent or foreign film. I used to be an english major until I switched to journalism. I've been writing creatively since I was 15. Songs, poems, short stories, novels, scripts, etc. In journalism, you're taught to draw the reader in with your lead. When you apply for jobs, and they ask for samples, they usually only read your leads. Odds are if your lead stinks, the rest of your article probably isn't good either. After the girl passes the picture test, I read the self summary, if it's weak, I move on. When I see your self summary, I'm thinking, "cool, she found some quote online." Whether it relates to you or not, it's not very hard to dig up a quote on the internet. If you're creative, show it. Write something original. Using someone else's quote for a "self summary" is laughably ironic. 1
whichwayisup Posted July 24, 2012 Posted July 24, 2012 I know nothing about dating profiles but maybe it's too detailed? When I see your self summary, I'm thinking, "cool, she found some quote online." Whether it relates to you or not, it's not very hard to dig up a quote on the internet. If you're creative, show it. Write something original. Using someone else's quote for a "self summary" is laughably ironic. I agree with this.
Forever Silent Posted July 24, 2012 Posted July 24, 2012 When I think about OLD, i think about efficiency. While your OLD is detailed and precise, I feel it is too detailed. Leave a little room for mystery. Also I agree with the other posters. Please remove the quote. You want your own words on your personal summary. Afterall it is your summary, no one else can describe you! Other than that, I wish you well in your OLD endeavors. Also do not worry about your profile, as long as your pictures show that you have personality and attractiveness, the guys will be drooling over you. Average Profile, Superb Pics > Superb Profile, Average Pics. 1
Author writergal Posted July 24, 2012 Author Posted July 24, 2012 I just stumbled across a guy's OLD profile where he actually wrote a soliloquy of himself in his self-summary section. It caught my attention because it was relevant, funny, and full of references from his real life. Should I try something like that instead of the Parker poem? 1
Author writergal Posted July 24, 2012 Author Posted July 24, 2012 When you all say my OLD profile is too detailed. Can you be more specific please?
MrCastle Posted July 24, 2012 Posted July 24, 2012 When you all say my OLD profile is too detailed. Can you be more specific please? I think your music one is pretty bloated. I don't think any man is going to read off that entire list. I do at most 3-4 artists, and ones that are pretty well known to increase my odds of someone liking the same stuff. Black Keys, Led Zeppelin, Jimi Hendrix, 90's Alternative. I don't write anything more after that. As someone else said, you want to leave some mystery.
MrCastle Posted July 24, 2012 Posted July 24, 2012 I just stumbled across a guy's OLD profile where he actually wrote a soliloquy of himself in his self-summary section. It caught my attention because it was relevant, funny, and full of references from his real life. Should I try something like that instead of the Parker poem? If you're a creative writer then yes, that would be better than a quote. Not too elaborate, you don't want to seem too desperate. But the quote (to me) makes you come off as a pseudo-intellectual, and the only thing more annoying than a know it all is someone who thinks they know it all.
Author writergal Posted July 24, 2012 Author Posted July 24, 2012 That makes sense. I can thin out my interests section, no problem. As a writer, I'll just consider the above profile my 1st of a few drafts. I still like the Parker poem though. Ha ha. I'll try to come up with a short, quippy poem of my own creation because I have writers block when it comes to sharing personal information about myself online. Should I be more sarcastic or ironic though, to catch the attention of men in my age group (in their 40s) since I'm 41.
oaks Posted July 24, 2012 Posted July 24, 2012 I just stumbled across a guy's OLD profile where he actually wrote a soliloquy of himself in his self-summary section. It caught my attention because it was relevant, funny, and full of references from his real life. Should I try something like that instead of the Parker poem? At least it would be a self summary rather than a quote from someone who doesn't even know you.
Airborne Posted July 24, 2012 Posted July 24, 2012 I go by pictures. Have any full body shots in a dress or something sexy?
Author writergal Posted July 24, 2012 Author Posted July 24, 2012 Airborne, no full body shots of sexy-wear in my profile. I have about 10 photos from past travels, recent activities, and a few profile photos. I know men are visual creatures, but I'm hoping to snag one who isn't that superficial. 1
MrCastle Posted July 24, 2012 Posted July 24, 2012 Airborne, no full body shots of sexy-wear in my profile. I have about 10 photos from past travels, recent activities, and a few profile photos. I know men are visual creatures, but I'm hoping to snag one who isn't that superficial. Your market (like everyone's market) is going to be limited to men who find you physically attractive, before all else. From that market, men will then decide if they think your personality will be a nice mesh with theirs, or if you are not their type. But you will not find a man who will say "Well physically she's not my type, but her personality! whoa!" Especially online. Maybe in person your personality can carry you, but not on a website. Your pictures will always be most important. That's what you have to be willing to accept when you sign up for OLD. Your pictures are your livelihood.
Author writergal Posted July 24, 2012 Author Posted July 24, 2012 I know that OLD photos should tell a story, act as supportive evidence to the OLD dating profile. All of my photos are accurate reflections of my lifestyle and personality though; none of which includes inappropriate photos. I'm fully clothed in every photo.
MrCastle Posted July 24, 2012 Posted July 24, 2012 I know that OLD photos should tell a story, act as supportive evidence to the OLD dating profile. All of my photos are accurate reflections of my lifestyle and personality though; none of which includes inappropriate photos. I'm fully clothed in every photo. As well you should be. I skip over the girls who dress slutty. You will find higher quality men that way, but those men will still need to be physically attracted to you for them to send a message.
Author writergal Posted July 24, 2012 Author Posted July 24, 2012 And that's the frustrating part because that kind of un-necessary pressure makes me feel like a piece of meat. I miss my 20s, when technology wasn't advanced enough which forced people to date in-person or through dating services (think: Love Connection with host Chuck Woolery 1983-1994). Plus, I think Mother Nature trumps technology every time when you and your date meet in person. Why? Chemistry. Chemistry online is waaay different than chemistry in person.
SunandMoon Posted July 24, 2012 Posted July 24, 2012 Wow your profile is super organized and highly informative. @.@ Good job with it! I've never done OLD so I really don't have any advice to dole out... 1
MrCastle Posted July 24, 2012 Posted July 24, 2012 And that's the frustrating part because that kind of un-necessary pressure makes me feel like a piece of meat. I miss my 20s, when technology wasn't advanced enough which forced people to date in-person or through dating services (think: Love Connection with host Chuck Woolery 1983-1994). Plus, I think Mother Nature trumps technology every time when you and your date meet in person. Why? Chemistry. Chemistry online is waaay different than chemistry in person. Oh I totally agree. I don't like how we're able to completely judge someone off of a few pictures and words. But that's what OLD is. That will never change. Real life interactions will always be better because they're natural. It's how nature wanted us to communicate.
todreaminblue Posted July 24, 2012 Posted July 24, 2012 When you all say my OLD profile is too detailed. Can you be more specific please? The music mix you have is eclectic so consider listing the genres of music you are interested in, for the men also who may never have heard of all the groups or some of the groups you have mentioned.That limits it to about two lines and says everything.....anything more is overkill. I agree with the poem not being right fir your self summary. What I did notice is you didn't put up what you are looking for in a man.What pushes your buttons when a man walks in a room.what you want what turns you off.Just your attributes and obvious intelligence.Your profile is well written and comprehensive in that respect almost like two dates in one. Mystery is your best friend. Your photo your passport at the checking in gate and if you can swallow the fear of putting yourself out there and get over your writers block in giving yourself a summary ... your passport photo will be approved and its clear skies to what could be for you and guy that makes your toes curl...... what the heck your picture and everything you like and are good at, is already out there . Be cheeky, be random, have fun, don't take it seriously write what you want to write. Your photograph is the bait when it comes to OLD.Don't go into overkill save some details for the men to question you about. My self summary is titled Ten things about me you cant see in the photo.Its short and you can be cheeky and witty or staid and vanilla as you want. So its catchy and involves a sharing of information you can give them a hint to give you ten things back(i've shown you mine now you show me yours) and it helps them out with what to write in opening email....which is often hard for a guy because they want to leave an impression....never quite sure of what to write on both sides its hard for females too.So when I chase I write it in reverse and ask them to write me back.....it works. Its creative and they make think of something that they wouldn't have mentioned before and a different perspective ....even if it is goofy naff and old.It does work I didn't mean for you to use this (I'm not up myself thinking I know best) but along those lines,mine is a goofy sample of something that has worked, let your inner writer free and add good photography....... A short but interesting profile, allows the guy to write a longer email while he is staring at your photo...hopefully smiling and both hands on the keyboard....clothed is good too ...the photo is always the key apparently......good luck in all things written and happy dating ....deb
Airborne Posted July 24, 2012 Posted July 24, 2012 Doesn't have to be anything inappropriate. Something on the level of what you would wear to a wedding does fine. Nice dress, hair down, make up. I saw the pic you had up briefly, you're attractive! A picture like that would get me reading your profile and googling who Dorothy Parker was so I could seem smart in my first email. Castle is right however. Guys like me who see a piece of meat are easy enough to weed out through conversation, but even the super intellectual guys who wouldn't be like that check pics first and then decide which profiles to read. It would give you more of a chance to develop that chemistry with someone in person.
Art_Critic Posted July 24, 2012 Posted July 24, 2012 I like your profile.. But you do use 2 quotes in your descriptions My opinion is this... The section called Living in the now. Life is short. would make a great short summary as well. I read it as if I was reading it online and skipped over the quote even though I knew it was important.. Not sure but maybe it is a guy thing I really like all the detail and the preciseness..it is part of who you are. I know the summary quote is too but it being such a long quote makes the eyes glance over it rather than read it... If you feel you want the Dorothy Parker quote in the summary you can always try it as is and pull it later for a refresher.
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