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How common/rare is being "sprung" for you?


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Posted

I don't know exactly what phrase to use but I have only crushed/been sprung/had a gut level attraction 3 times in my life. I'm talking about where you can't stop thinking about them and you like everything about them down to the way they walk. I don't know if they somehow strike an emotional cord or if it's pheromones but it's RARE for me.

Posted

Once. Every now and then I still think of her.

Posted

Do you mean initially?

Posted

Once. I still think of him just about every day and how I wish he didn't turn out to be such a egomaniac :/

Posted (edited)

Good question. I really hope to see answers. In another thread, people were treating it like it was common, but for me at least, it's not. Maybe you phrased it better than me.

 

I've only had it happen 3 times too. The first 2 were nothing compared to the last. They were immediate attractions but took a little time to get to the "gut" stage. Didn't get to that level until after a lot of flirting over a couple days to weeks. One I got over immediately cause he turned out to be an ahole player. The other was really sweet and wonderful but had ex gf issues and kept putting her ahead of me. That lasted only a few months but took years to fully get past when it didn't work out.

 

This last time, I got that gut reaction in just minutes before he even spoke to me. I wasn't close enough for any smelling, so I don't think pheromones explains it. I don't know if it hit me before or after I heard him talk to someone else, but the only unique trait I've been able to identify is his voice. He also seemed very familiar. If I believed in that stuff, I'd think it was some sort of past life thing.

Edited by McGuffin
Posted

Don't think I ever felt that way for someone...my gosh.

That is sad.

Posted
Don't think I ever felt that way for someone...my gosh.

That is sad.

I wanted to write the same thing. I have no idea what this will feel like. I have to force myself to really really like someone. However I have never had a sprung feeling . I fell for my bestfriend but that was after months and I got over him pretty fast dispite the attraction.

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Posted
Do you mean initially?

 

For the most part yes because I guess people feel like that when they fall in love eventually. I'm talking about instasprung like the girl I met at my job a little iver a year ago. I was so attracted to her it was like I could feel it.

Posted
For the most part yes because I guess people feel like that when they fall in love eventually. I'm talking about instasprung like the girl I met at my job a little iver a year ago. I was so attracted to her it was like I could feel it.

As silly it may sound... I have no idea what that is, however I am very jaded so that may just be me. It doesn't sound like a good thing but it does sound kind of refreshing for someone who has never experienced it. Granted I don't think I will ever want to be that hooked on someone - then again knowing me I probably wouldn't allow myself.

Posted
As silly it may sound... I have no idea what that is, however I am very jaded so that may just be me. It doesn't sound like a good thing but it does sound kind of refreshing for someone who has never experienced it. Granted I don't think I will ever want to be that hooked on someone - then again knowing me I probably wouldn't allow myself.

Having been "sprung" for someone in this manner, I completely understand your feeling toward it. It was, like SJC2008 said, an instant attraction. I spoke with her online at about 16 for a few months, then met for professional purposes (music - I make beats, she sings). I swear, literally the moment I clapped eyes on her, I was into her, even after I had seen her pic already. I don't even know why, she isn't the hottest girl I've known conventionally, but she was just gorgeous. And I certainly wasn't the only one who thought that.

 

Nearly everything I learned about dating, I learned because I was infatuated with that girl.

Posted

once, at work she was a customer.

 

she was butterface in shape. I didn't find her attractive at all at first but her personality was amazing and made her very attractive to me.

Posted
I don't know exactly what phrase to use but I have only crushed/been sprung/had a gut level attraction 3 times in my life. I'm talking about where you can't stop thinking about them and you like everything about them down to the way they walk. I don't know if they somehow strike an emotional cord or if it's pheromones but it's RARE for me.

 

 

It is called the honeymoon phase. It is usually the first stage.

Posted
I don't know exactly what phrase to use but I have only crushed/been sprung/had a gut level attraction 3 times in my life. I'm talking about where you can't stop thinking about them and you like everything about them down to the way they walk. I don't know if they somehow strike an emotional cord or if it's pheromones but it's RARE for me.

 

Good question actually. What you describe I would categorize as a mix between emotional attachment and what some people call 'love'. I differentiate it from a crush in that it is stronger and does not fade. It has happened to me about 4 times.

 

1) When I was about 20, and the first woman I ever really fell for. She was a friend of a friend who I knew and asked out after a little while. She went out with me on a date, and then rejected me and proceeded to date one of my best friends, the very friend who was trying to hook me up with her. I continued to hang around her because she was my bud's GF, and fell deeper and deeper for her. She then proceeded to sleep with my other best friend. I liked her for something like 4 years.

 

2) When I was in my mid 20s, I hung around with a gal I wasn't initially attracted to all that much for about a year, thinking mostly friendship. We spent tons of time one on one and finally something snapped and I really liked her. She rejected me while also professing attraction for more than one of my friends. It messed me up pretty bad, but she was such a cool gal, she made it so hard to hate her. She insisted on staying friends. She's currently married and one of my best friends.

 

3) My most serious GF was 2 years. For a while when we dated, I was really into her. It's what I thought at the time was love. My infatuation with her blinded me to the way she mistreated me and put me down. We broke up but are still friends.

 

4) Just last year I worked with a woman who I had a mild physical attraction to initially at best and no emotional attraction for almost a year. We spent so much time alone, something snapped and I totally fell in love with her. She rejected me and mostly ignored me when I tried to stay friends. She proceeded to date and chase other guys and when I got a GF, did crap to make me jealous even though she didn't like me. I assume she was just jealous I had someone. Even after all that, I still had it really bad for her. I still think about her. Insanity.

 

What you describe are the feelings most people are chasing after and it's what I am trying to avoid... for good reason.

Posted

The title of this thread makes me laugh. I picture his fly popping open and...

Posted

That type of attraction initially, not developing over time...

 

Once.

 

And I am twenty eight.

 

And I have been married. And it wasn't my ex husband.

 

I'm having trouble stopping it.

Posted

In the initial stages? Every time.

 

I only approach/date girls that give off the vibe that they're different

 

But...doesn't take long for them to prove me otherwise :)

Posted
It is called the honeymoon phase. It is usually the first stage.

 

Yeah, but it is more than a honeymoon phase. That can happen in most relationships, however to be really "sprung" on someone only happens to most people once in a lifetime. Some people never experience that feeling.

Posted
I don't know exactly what phrase to use but I have only crushed/been sprung/had a gut level attraction 3 times in my life. I'm talking about where you can't stop thinking about them and you like everything about them down to the way they walk. I don't know if they somehow strike an emotional cord or if it's pheromones but it's RARE for me.

 

Roughly about 3 times too but only one of them has stayed on my mind consistently for years. He got under my skin and into my mind. I have no explanation for it.

Posted

Too often. :laugh:

 

 

 

I just used to get in wayyyyyy too deep with men wayyyyy too soon.

Posted

Once for me as well. I met him online in a game we both played and became friends for a few months, during which he pursued me relentlessly. However, I was in a relationship (although it was dying) so nothing happened.

 

At this point, I'd only seen one picture of him and I didn't even think much of it... One day, I ended that relationship and we became involved... and it was a whirlwind from there. I fell in love with him hopelessly.. and when I met him... wow. Never been so attracted to anyone in my entire life.

 

It was horrible to feel so helpless... and it devastated me when he turned out to be a freaking sociopath. He broke my heart in a million pieces. I sincerely hope to never feel like that for anyone again.

Posted
I find it sad that you feel that way. My love smashed my heart into a million pieces too but I don't want to be deadened by the experience. I don't know if things happen for a reason or not but I do feel grateful for the highs I got, higher than any drug I've ever taken, and for the absolutely crushing lows and all the emotions in between.

 

Without the bad we can never have the good because we'd have nothing to compare it to. I hope nothing like that ever happens to me, you or anyone again but I can honestly say I never felt more alive than I did in those 18 months, because feeling those feelings so intensely made me knew I was alive, living and that I was human.

 

To me, the excruciating pain I experienced as a result of being involved with this person was not worth ANY of the good times. No matter how mind-blowing they were.

 

However, I admire your spirit. I truly do. I wish I could see it like you do and be willing to take such a risk again... but I'm not.

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