how would you handle this. insight?

[maxy1]

i apologize if this is tldr, but i really could use some insight..

 

i'm 24 and last year i broke up with a girl i dated seriously for years. we broke on initially rough terms, but ultimately forgave each other and agreed that we wished to simply remain friends. we basically lost interest towards the end of the relationship, moved about 45 minutes away from each other, and were just like really good friends. we broke in october of last year which was pretty much the last time we spoke, but recently i have been contacted by her letting me know what she's been up to and we have just chatted a bit. i have also randomly messaged her here and there with random life updates. i really don't care that she is with someone else at all (he can have her! lol) and she doesn't care who i'm seeing etc.

but i do enjoy chatting with her, and last we spoke she said that she wishes we could talk more and that she can talk to me easier than she can anyone. she's had a rough life, a lot of which i have helped and seen her through. we have a ton of mutual friends, and it would be cool if she wasn't banned from being around her old friends just because i am there..

 

which leads us to the issue: the new boyfriend aspect. her new bf hates my guts for some reason, though i have never done anything to him, nor have i even seen her since they started dating months ago. he keeps deleting me off her facebook (he already has her password and everything) and just last night sent me a message cussing me out and saying if i truly care for her then stop talking to her ,even though she usually is the one contacting me..so i dunno what to do, should i just ignore his message? or should i respond and just be like "hey guy chill out, no one's trying to steal your girl blah blah..."

 

he has deleted me off her facebook once before, but she added me back. also, and just trust me when i say this, he has made some pretty negative influences on her lifestyle. i won't go into details, but it's not cool..

 

i just hate to see a truly good and positive friendship go to waste like this. also, i hate to see the road she is heading down because she is better than that. and that facebook message i got last night from him, i just dunno.. what say you all?

[maxy1]

or should i just drop her and everything completely? i am not as inclined to this idea because then this douchebag dude might get a half chub thinking that i was scared away by his message or something

[JoJola]

does she knw about this message from him

[maxy1]

Probably not, she probably doesn't even know he unfriended me. I noticed he also unfriended another one of her other exes and deleted all the photos of us being out with mutual friends if I happened to be in them, even if i was in the back ground or it was a group shot.

 

Thinking of letting her know, I know I'd want to know in that situation and again I don't like him thinking he can just threaten me to get his way. Too old for that bullsh*t.

[JoJola]

I would contact her; let her know what is going on; especially since she is making contact. Most likely she is not happy with him..if i am in a good relationship i dont think of talking to other men, ex's or any of them. Sounds like he is insecure; jealous type and nothing good comes out of that behavior

[maxy1]

i might just do that....

 

i get what you're saying about not talking to any other guys when you're with a guy you're happy with, but i don't really think there is anything wrong with a woman being healthy friends with a guy she isn't in a relationship with. i have plenty of friends that are women, and i do and always will talk to them regardless of if i'm in a relationship or not. different strokes i guess.

 

but what about the boyfriend that messaged me, i really want to tell him off because he really is a jackass but i kinda feel like it would be lowering myself to his level..

[maxy1]

anyone else have some thoughts on this? think i may contact her here in a minute