Can't let go even though I should

[Noise Girl]

I'm struggling so much with pain, loneliness and worthlessness after leaving my ex. He pretty much pushed me to the point of leaving him by acting disrespectful, heavy drinking and cocaine use.

 

I know he is not right for me but why can't I stop loving him?

 

I've done NC and it's been a couple of weeks. I've gone on dates where I've tried to feel something. I've journaled,etc.

 

I feel like I'm doing everything I'm 'supposed' to do but I still feel sad and on the verge of tears every minute.

 

When will this pain start to fade?

[The Tallest One]

Noise Girl, the pain will go away, you just have to give it time! I wouldn't even bother going on dates till your fully healed cause it only prolongs the pain. Surround yourself with family and friends, people who love you.

 

Heavy drinking and cocaine use has to be a deal breaker for you in all relationships and anytime someone doesn't respect you, you should give them the boot!

 

Work on you and your self estee, do things you like!

[Noise Girl]

I know rationally that he was so wrong for me but the love was so intense. I think that's why I'm really struggling to let go even though it feels like it's really easy for him to let go.

 

I guess I thought our love was worth fighting for but he couldn't even stop drinking and partying for one night to try to work on us.

 

As I read over this, I sound delusional and stupid but guess that's what love does to us?

[Nancy B]

It's difficult to let go of an intense love.

 

Someone told me here that certain relationships have passion and lack compatibility. These are the hardest to let go of.

 

Imagine how good it will be when you meet someone who brings both passion and compatibility. Or passion through compatibility.

 

Your ex has no interest in seeing eye to eye with you or taking care of your needs. Passion that stands alone is irrelevant to happiness and living life to the full. You deserve better, move on.