Seductive Posted July 23, 2012 Posted July 23, 2012 Take off from the age thread. Curious to see how people feel about this. I know college education doesn't always correlate with intelligence. There are some dumb people with Ph.D's and there are some smart and successful people that only attended highschool. I have a masters degree, but I'm not expecting my future mate to have one. I just prefer that he be college-educated and have a stable professional career, as I do. This preference stems from my college dating experiences. I dated two men that had little ambition and no clear career goals. Let's just say it dampened the relationship. What about you? Are there any success stories where you know a female engineer or doctor married to a man that's blue collar?
ThaWholigan Posted July 23, 2012 Posted July 23, 2012 Take off from the age thread. Curious to see how people feel about this. I know college education doesn't always correlate with intelligence. There are some dumb people with Ph.D's and there are some smart and successful people that only attended highschool. I have a masters degree, but I'm not expecting my future mate to have one. I just prefer that he be college-educated and have a stable professional career, as I do. This preference stems from my college dating experiences. I dated two men that had little ambition and no clear career goals. Let's just say it dampened the relationship. What about you? Are there any success stories where you know a female engineer or doctor married to a man that's blue collar? I would prefer somebody intelligent and open minded, but I don't know if they have to be college educated. A number of girls I know are a little bit airy fairy, but I often have an affinity with the ones who at least got a diploma like me. I never did get a degree however, so I can imagine there are women with degrees who would not look upon me favorably as a dating option. It is what it is. I have vast ambition and career goals, but I don't feel I need a degree to fulfill them, but I would like to get a degree simply because I love to learn and study. I would like to date a girl who can complement my ambition with her own drive. College educated or not. 3
Cracker Jack Posted July 23, 2012 Posted July 23, 2012 Can't say it's really a preference of mine. I likely wouldn't be too attracted to the high school dropout, obviously. I have a degree, but it's not something I'd expect from a woman I'm dating. As long as we can relate to each other in many ways, a degree would be irrelevant to our relationship.
Author Seductive Posted July 23, 2012 Author Posted July 23, 2012 Thawhooligan-Yes, you made some good points. Intelligence and being able to learn something from someone is a huge turn on for me. I would also like someone that matches my ambition. When I dated those two men in college, I felt like I was always the one teaching them things and correcting them. An example is how my ex at 18 was failing all of his classes where I working my butt off to get A's. I felt like a mom when I was explaining the importance of education. My other ex at 21 in college almost wanted to drop out of college, but his whole family felt like it would be a big mistake for his future. After college, I dated an MD and we were able to have great conversations. I felt like he was a walking encylopedia. My most recent ex was an accountant, who was also wordly and well-read.
miss_jaclynrae Posted July 23, 2012 Posted July 23, 2012 I haven't been to school but I have a high sense of respect for ones who have or work and DO go to school. It isn't the education as much as it is the hard work they put in to earn it. That being said, I can't wait to start [next fall hopefully if I can afford the time off work] and look forward to furthering my education. It is very important to me, although I don't deem it necessary, I very well COULD be a car sales consultant for the rest of my life. As long as he shows that he has integrity and is a hard worker, and has future goals career or education wise, I admire them. 2
MontanaGirl Posted July 23, 2012 Posted July 23, 2012 I'm wildly attracted to intelligence and knowledge, probably more so than I should be. I know education doesn't equal these traits (I've met some pretty dense PhDs in my field), it is a reasonably strong correlation. I wouldn't turn down a good guy with "only" a college degree, but would have a hard time getting serious with somebody who hadn't even gone that far in school. I'm working towards a PhD, so am around mostly MDs and PhDs anyway (or students earning those degrees). 1
Author Seductive Posted July 23, 2012 Author Posted July 23, 2012 I haven't been to school but I have a high sense of respect for ones who have or work and DO go to school. It isn't the education as much as it is the hard work they put in to earn it. That being said, I can't wait to start [next fall hopefully if I can afford the time off work] and look forward to furthering my education. It is very important to me, although I don't deem it necessary, I very well COULD be a car sales consultant for the rest of my life. As long as he shows that he has integrity and is a hard worker, and has future goals career or education wise, I admire them. You're only 22 though, right? You have plenty of time. Bless my good guy friend's heart, but he's a 41 year old retail worker living in dad's basement with no car. He has proposed to me several times, but I've told him that age and education are my deal-breakers. I sometimes wonder if I come off as snobby for having these preferences, but it's important to me.
brahmabull117 Posted July 23, 2012 Posted July 23, 2012 no I don't care, why in the world would I care? Though I definitely prefer a girl making a good living. I don't want to have a GF where I'm constantly expected to pay for everything
jakelongot Posted July 23, 2012 Posted July 23, 2012 I have a masters degree, but I'm not expecting my future mate to have one. Masters degree can be deceiving. I've had a few friends and acquaintances that have either stayed in school out of college to get a masters degree because "it was just the next thing to do" or "because the job market is so bad i'll just get my masters and wait it out" To me, getting a masters just for the sake of having it is the opposite of smart. A lot of young people choose to get a masters without having any experience and it becomes very difficult to get a job later on because they have a degree that "overqualifies" them for entry level positions yet "underqualifies" them for higher positions that requires more experience. They really shoot themselves in the foot. Others go to graduate school without doing the appropriate research on what exactly a masters degree will do for them. They end up adding a degree that they don't really need and it up with several thousands more in debt.
Woggle Posted July 23, 2012 Posted July 23, 2012 I get along with blue collar people so it doesn't really matter. Matter of fact people with tons of degrees but little street education annoy me the most because they don't know the things you can only learn by living life. This goes for people in general though and not just in dating.
Author Seductive Posted July 23, 2012 Author Posted July 23, 2012 Masters degree can be deceiving. I've had a few friends and acquaintances that have either stayed in school out of college to get a masters degree because "it was just the next thing to do" or "because the job market is so bad i'll just get my masters and wait it out" To me, getting a masters just for the sake of having it is the opposite of smart. A lot of young people choose to get a masters without having any experience and it becomes very difficult to get a job later on because they have a degree that "overqualifies" them for entry level positions yet "underqualifies" them for higher positions that requires more experience. They really shoot themselves in the foot. Others go to graduate school without doing the appropriate research on what exactly a masters degree will do for them. They end up adding a degree that they don't really need and it up with several thousands more in debt. In my case, having a masters degree is what I needed to get where I am today. I wouldn't have the job I have now if I only had a bachelors. I did enjoy learning about things that would further my expertise in graduate school. The bachelors degree in my field was the basic foundation. The loan program I'm a part of will forgive you after 25 years anyway. I got out of Sallie Mae ASAP. Woggle-Yes, a lot of superficially educated people do lack street smarts, because they may have come from overprotective families that sheltered them in suburban life (like my family). Some of my good friends are blue-collar, because they aren't stuck-up, judgmental, racist and are just fun to be around with. When it comes to starting a family, I would prefer someone similar to me.
Woggle Posted July 23, 2012 Posted July 23, 2012 I realize why it is but it is still an annoying trait. I would rather hang out in a bar with a bunch of construction then have wine coolers with a bunch of yuppies. If a person has tons of book smarts but is life stupid what is the point? That guy that shot up the movie theater was highly educated and it didn't do much good.
oaks Posted July 23, 2012 Posted July 23, 2012 I don't want to date a stupid idiot, but I know that educational qualifications aren't what makes you smart either. I want someone intelligent, but I don't care how she got that way. 1
jakelongot Posted July 23, 2012 Posted July 23, 2012 In my case, having a masters degree is what I needed to get where I am today. I wouldn't have the job I have now if I only had a bachelors. I did enjoy learning about things that would further my expertise in graduate school. The bachelors degree in my field was the basic foundation. The loan program I'm a part of will forgive you after 25 years anyway. I got out of Sallie Mae ASAP. Woggle-Yes, a lot of superficially educated people do lack street smarts, because they may have come from overprotective families that sheltered them in suburban life (like my family). Some of my good friends are blue-collar, because they aren't stuck-up, judgmental, racist and are just fun to be around with. When it comes to starting a family, I would prefer someone similar to me. Not saying this applies to you at all. Just saying Master Degree doesn't necessarily equal intelligence. And I actually read your post wrong. I thought you said your mate "must" have a bachelor's degree. Carry on
Eternal Sunshine Posted July 23, 2012 Posted July 23, 2012 College degree is a bare minimum and a must for me in a boyfriend. When I first started OLD, I was open to meeting men without it. Each and every one of them wasn't intelligent enough for me. Not saying that everyone that has a college degree is intelligent, far from it, just that correlation is high enough for me not to bother. 3
GoodOnPaper Posted July 23, 2012 Posted July 23, 2012 I was hoping to marry someone who also had a PhD but it didn't work out that way. Among the women in my graduate program, they were engaged/married to someone less educated or seemed to actively pursue "opposites-attract" type relationships. All-in-all, it seemed that my education level was much more of an obstacle than an asset. What about you? Are there any success stories where you know a female engineer or doctor married to a man that's blue collar? My community is riddled with couples where the woman is more educated -- maybe that's more common in smaller cities?
FitChick Posted July 23, 2012 Posted July 23, 2012 The Aurora/Batman shooter was working on his PhD. Richard Branson dropped out of school when he was sixteen. 4
Eternal Sunshine Posted July 23, 2012 Posted July 23, 2012 The Aurora/Batman shooter was working on his PhD. Richard Branson dropped out of school when he was sixteen. Your point being? Intelligent people are as likely to be mentally ill as less intelligent ones. Also, correlation doesn't mean everyone. 1
oaks Posted July 23, 2012 Posted July 23, 2012 Not saying that everyone that has a college degree is intelligent, far from it, just that correlation is high enough for me not to bother. Speaking of correlations... intelligent girls are hot. 5
Author Seductive Posted July 23, 2012 Author Posted July 23, 2012 You find crazy people everywhere. A lot of my clients at my job are blue-collar or are living off of the state/SSDI, and they struggle with mental health issues, drug abuse and toxic parenting where the kids get taken away by CPS. I do believe that the stereotype "only abuse happens in lower income families" is BS. Just saying that you see these people in all populations. Wealthier and educated families are better at hiding it to protect reputation.
Woggle Posted July 23, 2012 Posted July 23, 2012 Blue collar losers annoy me Remember that the next time you need your car fixed or work on your house done or something built. Truth be told the job they do is usually much more important than what most white collar yuppies do. 3
stillafool Posted July 23, 2012 Posted July 23, 2012 Take off from the age thread. Curious to see how people feel about this. I know college education doesn't always correlate with intelligence. There are some dumb people with Ph.D's and there are some smart and successful people that only attended highschool. I have a masters degree, but I'm not expecting my future mate to have one. I just prefer that he be college-educated and have a stable professional career, as I do. This preference stems from my college dating experiences. I dated two men that had little ambition and no clear career goals. Let's just say it dampened the relationship. What about you? Are there any success stories where you know a female engineer or doctor married to a man that's blue collar? My cousin is married to an anesthesiologist and she has a HS diploma. They've been married about 24 years, 2 kids and they are quite happy. Mind you she was always the "beauty" of our family and she still is quite pretty. I have to say aside from her looks she is a great person but so is he.
threebyfate Posted July 23, 2012 Posted July 23, 2012 Married a man with similar level. Academia tends to crank out similarities. 1
stillafool Posted July 23, 2012 Posted July 23, 2012 Bless my good guy friend's heart, but he's a 41 year old retail worker living in dad's basement with no car. He has proposed to me several times, but I've told him that age and education are my deal-breakers. I sometimes wonder if I come off as snobby for having these preferences, but it's important to me. You have every right to date who you prefer but I wonder, if you know those are deal breakers for you why would you date someone who doesn't have a college degree in the first place?
TaurusTerp Posted July 23, 2012 Posted July 23, 2012 I'd need a girl that has a Bachelor's at minimum, with career ambitions. Someone who doesn't value an education, who thinks that they can just find a way to make money and have opportunities open up to them is not compatible with me.
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