StrangeBehaviors Posted July 21, 2012 Posted July 21, 2012 Think of some significant relationships you have had, and that you have ended. Why did you end them? What was your age?
Ruby65 Posted July 21, 2012 Posted July 21, 2012 In my teens and early 20's, I broke up for one reason only, which is that I had either stopped feeling attracted to them or had started feeling more attracted to someone else. I hate to admit it, but usually what killed the attraction for me was that the guy would love me too much, too soon or be too much of a pushover and not be challenging enough. I don't think I was ever honest with them about this, though. I usually made up some stupid excuse so I wouldn't seem like a bad person. All through my 30's I was married. Single again in my 40's I've only ended relationships if the guy was cheating. I've been broken up with a few times, mostly due to midlife crisis (GIGS).
Author StrangeBehaviors Posted July 21, 2012 Author Posted July 21, 2012 Why the divorce? (If you want to say)
Ruby65 Posted July 21, 2012 Posted July 21, 2012 My H had become verbally abusive to our son. He had become abusive to me as well, but I ended it because of our son.
Author StrangeBehaviors Posted July 21, 2012 Author Posted July 21, 2012 My H had become verbally abusive to our son. He had become abusive to me as well, but I ended it because of our son. Last questions for you. (I think) Was he this way before the marriage and you were blind too it? Signs there that you chose not to see? Or did he change towards this? Would you have stayed longer in your early 20's with him behaving this way?
KathyM Posted July 21, 2012 Posted July 21, 2012 I've dated boys/men from the time I was 14 years old. I had two long-term exclusive relationships with men before meeting my husband. One when I was 17, one when I was 18. I broke up with the first long term bf because his visa ran out and he had to go back to his country. That was a difficult experience, because I had grown very attached to him. We spent every day together. He was my first real bf. I broke up with my second long term bf that I had when 18 years old when it became obvious that his values were not compatible with mine. He was quite broken up about my leaving him. We had a lot in common, but values wasn't one of them, and if your values are incompatible, that doesn't make for a lasting relationship. I met my husband shortly after the breakup, and married him 18 months later. Still happily married after many years.
Ruby65 Posted July 21, 2012 Posted July 21, 2012 Last questions for you. (I think) Was he this way before the marriage and you were blind too it? Signs there that you chose not to see? Or did he change towards this? Would you have stayed longer in your early 20's with him behaving this way? No, honestly there weren't signs of abuse before we got married. He changed after our son was born. It was like someone flicked the "crazy" switch in his head.
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