StarlaStardust Posted July 20, 2012 Posted July 20, 2012 It's been well over a month NC. I feel so heartbroken over what happened in my city last night. But it's also bringing up a lot of grief about my break up with my recent ex. He never spoke to me again after he broke up with me in an email after dating for 9 months, and I just want him to wonder if I'm okay. Everyone else has texted me or called to make sure I'm alright and that I wasn't at the theater, but he won't. I know this is totally immature and selfish, but it's honestly coming up with my sadness over the shooting itself.
skyisfalling Posted July 20, 2012 Posted July 20, 2012 Starla~ i didn't know you lived in CO. My heart goes out to all the victims and their families.. what a horrible tragedy. I'm so glad most of all that you were nowhere near the theater.. I'm sorry about feeling sad.. yet its another reminder what a douchebag the ex was to not even care in such a horrific tragedy. How are you doing?
Author StarlaStardust Posted July 20, 2012 Author Posted July 20, 2012 (edited) Starla~ i didn't know you lived in CO. My heart goes out to all the victims and their families.. what a horrible tragedy. I'm so glad most of all that you were nowhere near the theater.. I'm sorry about feeling sad.. yet its another reminder what a douchebag the ex was to not even care in such a horrific tragedy. How are you doing? Yay it's skyisfalling:) I'm not doing so good today. And I started seeing someone very nice, but after 2 dates, he is VERY clingy and needy, and if I don't answer him within 1 day about something, he starts texting me that he's assuming I'm not interested and stuff. And I started a POF profile, but the guys on there aren't really my speed. They want me to do a lot of the work, and I'm really just an old fashioned girl here, not looking for a penpal but to actually go on dates. And they make me feel bad and wrong for that. And I just miss my ex terribly. And I hate that he just disappeared on me:( And the world is a sad and scary place sometimes and I feel so lonely that I don't have any big strong guy to go cry to when it feels that way. Edited July 20, 2012 by StarlaStardust
Author StarlaStardust Posted July 20, 2012 Author Posted July 20, 2012 It's just interesting how sadness is kind of "packaged" with other triggers. What happened at the movie theater was just awful... but what it triggered more than anything, once I was done crying about the news this morning, was a sadness about the ex.
skyisfalling Posted July 20, 2012 Posted July 20, 2012 im sorry sweetie, it must feel even worse knowing that there was a shooting nearby.. and you just want to be comforted.. *virtual hug** hang in there girl. I heard with OLD it takes time, a LOT of time and its just a matter or giving yourself the opportunity to meet right and wrong people and kind of filtering people out.. but i'm glad you're taking the steps to put yourself out there. The more you put yourself out there the higher the probability of you finding the one person who really shakes up your bon bons You've been doing great, look how far you've come. Remember when we used to whine and DIE about wanting to contact our ex? haha it seems yesterday, but l think we should be proud of how much progress we made. I'm with you girl and let us know if you need anything- the forum is always here for you.
pathetic1999 Posted July 20, 2012 Posted July 20, 2012 I do know what you mean about the ex not caring...my ex knew I was about to potentially lose my job (we work in the same industry) and when the event went down not a text nothing from him to even check and see if I was kept on. And he didn't have any way of finding out if I individually was able to keep my job, I thought what a selfish POS to not even care, he knew this was coming up and how stressed out I was as it was only like 3 weeks post BU. So whatever I got to keep my job AND got a promotion, in his face!
CopingGal Posted July 20, 2012 Posted July 20, 2012 Hi. Sorry that happened to you. It is terrible. I read about it this morning. Geez.
Author StarlaStardust Posted July 21, 2012 Author Posted July 21, 2012 Thank you for being there for me earlier today. I made it through my day:) Holding firm to NC. Skyisfalling, anything new with you?
The Tallest One Posted July 22, 2012 Posted July 22, 2012 Starla, I'm so sorry to hear about the horrific tragedy in CO. I can't make any sence of it at all. I'm a big guy, 6'3", well over 200 lbs, so I'm sending you a virtual hug as well. I watched a very sad movie last night which brought me way down, then after movie turned on CNN and watched coverage of the shooting. I was dumped almost a month ago after a fifteen month roller coaster relationship and this weekend has been real tough for me as well. I saw the movie at a midnight premiere and didn't hear about shooting till next day. I saw it a second time with a different person, and although I'm 42 and like I said, a big guy, I did look around numerous times when people would come and go from the theater. Events like this shake us to our core. I also agree about what triggers us to feel sad. I feel very alone and lost without ex gf. So used to daily contact and spending time together, now don't know what to do with myself half the time. I don't know you at all but I'm glad your ok!
Author StarlaStardust Posted July 22, 2012 Author Posted July 22, 2012 Aw, Tallest, that is such a sweet post you wrote. Thank you, dear <3
skyisfalling Posted July 25, 2012 Posted July 25, 2012 Hi Starla, im checking in to see how you're feeling. I've been following your advice and been going out, working out at the gym and i must say, the world feels different. How you coping girl?
Author StarlaStardust Posted August 2, 2012 Author Posted August 2, 2012 Hey Sky! It's been too long, sorry! I'm doing pretty well -- I started casually dating again, a few guys:) I feel so happy to hear your world is feeling different! Sometimes it's still hard for me but it totally gets easier:) Still never heard from my ex ever again.
skyisfalling Posted August 3, 2012 Posted August 3, 2012 Hey Sky! It's been too long, sorry! I'm doing pretty well -- I started casually dating again, a few guys:) I feel so happy to hear your world is feeling different! Sometimes it's still hard for me but it totally gets easier:) Still never heard from my ex ever again. Starla! I'm so happy to hear from you and I'm happy that you're starting to date again.. it makes me think back to last month when we were bi*ching about our exes.. we sure come a long way huh? I definitely understand what you mean by getting easier. It's still devastating to think about and it does suck still but its a dull pain not sharp and life shattering as it was before. You HAVE TO update me on these men. Any of them tickling your fancy?
Author StarlaStardust Posted August 8, 2012 Author Posted August 8, 2012 Sky, I'm going to PM you my email addy:) I'm not keeping up here very well!
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