Author ozziegal8 Posted July 25, 2012 Author Posted July 25, 2012 i realise now he was just on there for one thing... my mates read his profile all of them said he sounds like a player.. he has also been online morning noon and night weird cos he is a labourer.
snowflakes88 Posted July 25, 2012 Posted July 25, 2012 of course i would, im just hurt cos he lied to me told me he wanted a relationship first time in my life i have said what i wanted and been up front and i was stooged... Saying he wanted a relationship doesn't necessarily mean he wanted one with you. Why are you still stalking his online activity?
Author ozziegal8 Posted July 25, 2012 Author Posted July 25, 2012 im not my mates checked out his profile and told me, they also said what he has written smells of 'player and no commitment' the guy was flaking on me before we even met so no i dont think he wants a relationship with anyone.
Author ozziegal8 Posted July 25, 2012 Author Posted July 25, 2012 im not my mates checked out his profile and told me, they also said what he has written smells of 'player and no commitment' the guy was flaking on me before we even met so no i dont think he wants a relationship with anyone.
Author ozziegal8 Posted July 25, 2012 Author Posted July 25, 2012 and looking back in hindsight, it was obvious that was all he was after, he chased me and wined and dined me pretended he wanted a relationship before he slept with me after he slept with me the next day he flaked on a date...
snowflakes88 Posted July 25, 2012 Posted July 25, 2012 You seem to think that if a man says he is looking for a relationship and then goes out with you, he is obligated to be in a relationship with YOU.
Shaun-Dro Posted July 25, 2012 Posted July 25, 2012 You're just being used, not a priority. He's either got something else or someone else going on ("he sexy one im down at my boss's place my phone is on charge, at a bbq i will let you know what im up to later?") red flag, he's intentionally ignoring you and you're not worth the valuable time, just when it's convenient for him. Don't be a fool, you know you like this guy but you're always going to get second class treatment If this is where you started out at, it doesn't get better or improves. When men are unavailable, that piques women's interest level sky high. Boy, the games...
josation218 Posted July 25, 2012 Posted July 25, 2012 after 4 dates hmmm isnt that normal these days? It all depends on the person moral standards.If you feel like everyone else is doing it and you want to be like them, by all mean go ahead. If you want to stand out dont follow what others do.. Just be yourself and stay true to your moral standards
2sunny Posted July 25, 2012 Posted July 25, 2012 even he is wasnt interested i have never met anyone that wouldnt even reply saying 'hey sorry but not interested' i dont know why he didnt? he was soo full on week before, maybe he lived out his fantasy with the underwear. You allowed it all. He treated you this way because you didn't have a boundary. Next time follow a mans actions LONG trm before having sex. We train people how to treat us - he got sex with little long term effort. 1
Author ozziegal8 Posted July 25, 2012 Author Posted July 25, 2012 You seem to think that if a man says he is looking for a relationship and then goes out with you, he is obligated to be in a relationship with YOU. why do you keep putting me down? the guy was cancelling on me before we even met up with pathetic excuses, all over like an octopus on date 3 going on about all his x's and their sex life it obvious he just after fun. if you read his dating profile you would probably say 'this one is not looking for serious with anyone'
Shaun-Dro Posted July 26, 2012 Posted July 26, 2012 why do you keep putting me down? the guy was cancelling on me before we even met up with pathetic excuses, all over like an octopus on date 3 going on about all his x's and their sex life it obvious he just after fun. if you read his dating profile you would probably say 'this one is not looking for serious with anyone' Where did you meet this guy? I always wonder where women be meeting these kinds of men because they all seem to be the same.
snowflakes88 Posted July 26, 2012 Posted July 26, 2012 I'm not trying to put you down at all. I just think you run the risk of getting into yet another one of these situations if you keep the mentality you have now. A person can say they are looking for a relationship, mean it, and still end up not wanting a relationship with you. It happens to everybody from time to time - nothing personal to you. I just think you will end up here again if you automatically assume that a guy who says he's looking for relationship isn't allowed to decide he doesn't want it with you.
xpaperxcutx Posted July 26, 2012 Posted July 26, 2012 why do you keep putting me down? the guy was cancelling on me before we even met up with pathetic excuses, all over like an octopus on date 3 going on about all his x's and their sex life it obvious he just after fun. if you read his dating profile you would probably say 'this one is not looking for serious with anyone' Nobody's putting you down. We're calling out your behavior so you know what to expe t next time you meet a douche. Also, own up to the part you played in this. If you feel a fool for falling for an ass, own up to the fact you fall too quickly and too fast. Set boundaries girl!
Author ozziegal8 Posted July 26, 2012 Author Posted July 26, 2012 Where did you meet this guy? I always wonder where women be meeting these kinds of men because they all seem to be the same. met him online
Author ozziegal8 Posted July 26, 2012 Author Posted July 26, 2012 I'm not trying to put you down at all. I just think you run the risk of getting into yet another one of these situations if you keep the mentality you have now. A person can say they are looking for a relationship, mean it, and still end up not wanting a relationship with you. It happens to everybody from time to time - nothing personal to you. I just think you will end up here again if you automatically assume that a guy who says he's looking for relationship isn't allowed to decide he doesn't want it with you. you are actually, everyone else here has the said the guy is a douchbag...and that he is a player...he also said things to me i.e. glad we finally met cant wait to see you, you have to meet my mates etc. the guy was doing this before we even met so im not sure why you are saying he isnt looking for serious with ME, i think he is online to get sex only...with anyone.he is online morning noon and night...isn't it obvious he was a player?
Author ozziegal8 Posted July 26, 2012 Author Posted July 26, 2012 Nobody's putting you down. We're calling out your behavior so you know what to expe t next time you meet a douche. Also, own up to the part you played in this. If you feel a fool for falling for an ass, own up to the fact you fall too quickly and too fast. Set boundaries girl! and yes i should have read the signs before i met up with him...when he kept cancelling with different excuses.
Leigh 87 Posted July 26, 2012 Posted July 26, 2012 Op, He may have wanted a relationship, but it does not mean he wants it with just any girl. Some men have high standards - they want more than a pretty face. They want a girl they really like and are really into. Short of that, they would rather play the field until they find one. It does not mean your not that awesome, although you may want to work on a fwe things, to make more guys into you. Just do things for you; study or do well at your job, have interesting hobbies and interests and be open to trying new things, get to the gym so your an attractive version of yourself.... If you ALREADY do those things and your a pretty good catch to a lot of men, you will have no trouble finding men who ARE interested and do not play games or flake. If your a great version of yourself but do not appeal to as many guys as some girls, just wait for the right guy, who will adore you and treat you properly. It is better to be alone than put up with men who are not into you, just so you can feel less lonley. I hate to say it, but a lot of women are not that great of a catch, and expect guys who pay them attention to actually want to be with them every time! I AM NOT saying this is you though. Only you can take a look at yourself, and see why you attract guys like this. It may not be because you do not take care of your appearance, are not that interesting, or etc.... First of all, in your case, you LET them flake on you. You act like you will stick around as a booty call and/or second option eve if the guy is not into you. Guys will respect you less and never think that highly of you when you act like this. For future reference; you should know, that if a guy does not follow things up and arrange to see you, he is not interested. Most me, once YOU show them you are open to their advances, WILL make the effort if they are that into you. By all means, act interested, but if a guy is not that keen on you, he will flake, not see you each week, and go to BBQ"s and hang out with his friends, without inviting you. But he may still say he will do some of these things to keep you around for sex. Please just focus on yourself, and wait until a guy puts in a propper effort. 2
Author ozziegal8 Posted July 28, 2012 Author Posted July 28, 2012 i do do all these things i have a great job, have a great body i do loads of exercise, im smart, funny and well travelled. my mistake was not seeing the signs early. i havent dated anyone for a year so im not used to it. i thought his behaviour was normal when really he was a pig. i do not think this guy is looking for a relationship with anyone.
2sunny Posted July 28, 2012 Posted July 28, 2012 why do you keep putting me down? the guy was cancelling on me before we even met up with pathetic excuses, all over like an octopus on date 3 going on about all his x's and their sex life it obvious he just after fun. if you read his dating profile you would probably say 'this one is not looking for serious with anyone' And you ignored those signs - when you should have been paying close attention to the fact that he wasn't making you his priority. Yet, you had sex with him. That wasn't a good choice.
Author ozziegal8 Posted July 28, 2012 Author Posted July 28, 2012 cos its been a while since ive been with anybody, im lonely he took advantage of that i think. i asked him what he wanted he told me a relationship i was vulnerable i have learnt from it. i think he on there to have sex with anyone.
veggirl Posted July 28, 2012 Posted July 28, 2012 cos its been a while since ive been with anybody, im lonely he took advantage of that i think. i asked him what he wanted he told me a relationship i was vulnerable i have learnt from it. i think he on there to have sex with anyone. Okay I really think you should not have sex with a guy outside of a *committed relationship* if you are this vulnerable. 1
Author ozziegal8 Posted July 29, 2012 Author Posted July 29, 2012 i think i know that now, unfortunately i met a man who was good at taking advantage of my vulnerability...but that's online for you
snowflakes88 Posted July 29, 2012 Posted July 29, 2012 It has nothing to do with online dating. You could have had the same experience with someone you met IRL - and based on your past threads, it seems like you HAVE had this same experience with guys from off-line. The problem is that you like to place the blame fully with the guys. You refuse to accept responsibility for your role in these situations, which is why you will end up there again. 1
Author ozziegal8 Posted July 29, 2012 Author Posted July 29, 2012 i am not sure if you read my last couple of post snowflake ? I have admitted blame I know i didnt read the signs before sleeping with him, im not sure why you need to keep telling me this, i haven't dated for a while and didnt read the signs early. i thought about it this morning, i went away for the weekend when we first met saw him the next day he didnt even ask me one question about how my holiday was, that was one of many red flags.
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