Davigg Posted July 19, 2012 Posted July 19, 2012 me and my ex have known eachother for almost a year now and i recently broke up with her last week because i could no longer handle her moods and neediness. i really did love and care for this girl alot and it wasn't easy for me to let her go. at the beginning of our relationship, i was always the one chasing after her because she was afraid of getting into a relationship due to past ones hurting her so much. i still had hope that we could work out though, but lately i just haven't felt it like i used to. i tried explaining to her as nicely as i could that i just didn't want a girlfriend. i hoped she would just be cool about it and let go, but she keeps texting and calling me even though i ignore her. the other day, she literally just shows up at my house even after i told her not to come over. she kept knocking on my door and calling my roommate because i turned my phone off so i wouldn't have to deal with her calling. i know she is going through alot of **** in her life right now and that she's lonely
fucpcg Posted July 19, 2012 Posted July 19, 2012 You chase her because she doesn't want to date you, cause she's been burned in the past, then you get her to go out with you, then you decide you don't want her anymore and you now dump the one who didn't even want to date you because she wasn't in a place where she felt she could deal with another breakup. Then you put her thru another breakup. Shame on you dude. If she was THAT special that you had to keep chasing her when she was saying no, then she should be special enough for you to try and work thru whatever issues are going on in the relationship. Otherwise, you didn't have a real interest in HER, you just wanted to win the chase, which had nothing to do with how special of a person she was, and now that the chase is over, you throw away they prey. Once again, shame on you. She told you up front she was hurting, and scared to get hurt more, guess that wasn't your concern right? 4
KatZee Posted July 19, 2012 Posted July 19, 2012 Yeah really. You sound like my freaking ex. It was always about HIM with no regard for me or anything. Sorry to sound so bitter towards you but I feel sorry for your ex. Me personally? I wouldn't in a million years chase my ex. I see him for what he is and I hope your ex sees you for what you are soon. She deserves someone who's going to care for her genuinely and not just run at the first signs of stress. You need to grow a sack, man up and tell her the truth. Stop ignoring her like she's going to "get the hint" and go away. Open the door, tell her that you are sorry for hurting her but that you don't see a relationship working out with her and she needs to start moving on.
Ruby65 Posted July 19, 2012 Posted July 19, 2012 Since you've re-posted this identical post from yesterday, I will re-post the reply I gave you then: Well, you had what you described as a good relationship with her in which you loved and cared for her.... then decided you just didn't "feel it" anymore... so you dumped her with a lie by saying you didn't want to be in a relationship right now -- implying the problem wasn't personal to her, just that you didn't want a relationship in general. Basically, you lied to her about the reason for this breakup, then refused to communicate with her afterwards..... then you wonder why she's still calling and acting crazy and trying to get answers from you? How about owning up to your dishonesty? Tell her the real reason you broke up with her -- random as it is -- and answer any questions she has. Let her express herself and say whatever she needs to say. If you treat her with dignity and respect, it might make it easier for her to move on. 2
zanzi Posted July 19, 2012 Posted July 19, 2012 Oh this is so my situation. As soon as things get hard, a man will run! He ran, and now he's ignoring me. I try to ignore him too, then he bitches to my freinds so I call him out. Now its back to ignoring. He has the emotinal complexity of a pre-schooler, and this game is so silly!
JoJola Posted July 20, 2012 Posted July 20, 2012 very funny; i just posted about being ignored...chased.......then not even dumped..just ignored..not to mention he has my belongings. If you loved her you would not be doing this to her; you would stand up and be a man. You wanted to win...you won at the expense of her feelings 1
AlexanderJames Posted July 20, 2012 Posted July 20, 2012 You chase her because she doesn't want to date you, cause she's been burned in the past, then you get her to go out with you, then you decide you don't want her anymore and you now dump the one who didn't even want to date you because she wasn't in a place where she felt she could deal with another breakup. Then you put her thru another breakup. Shame on you dude. If she was THAT special that you had to keep chasing her when she was saying no, then she should be special enough for you to try and work thru whatever issues are going on in the relationship. Otherwise, you didn't have a real interest in HER, you just wanted to win the chase, which had nothing to do with how special of a person she was, and now that the chase is over, you throw away they prey. Once again, shame on you. She told you up front she was hurting, and scared to get hurt more, guess that wasn't your concern right? Couldn't have said it better myself. You say you really did love and care for this girl a lot and that you did all the chasing. You break up with her. You ask us if she's crazy, why? Because she's chasing you? Did you stop to think it might be because she had begun to let you in and open up? despite being hurt before? Because she had started to trust you with her heart? You had her thinking you were not like all the other bad guys out there. Then you up and left her in the cold. It doesnt work that way. Don't claim to love a girl that you left souly because you werent patient enough to let her open up tp you. That isnt love mate. Im sorry. I hope she stops chasing you soon and realises she's better off finding someone with the dedication and patience to treat her the way she deserves.
IST Posted July 20, 2012 Posted July 20, 2012 OP's situation is basically the situation I'm in, except flip the genders and I'm the crazy one texting and chasing.
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