Alpha males who don't cheat

[morichu]

I hear all the time that part of being an alpha male is to cheat in relationships. Well I'd consider myself Alpha and have never really had a desire to cheat or anything close to it.

 

I'm also alpha to the fact that if a girl ever screws me over she's gone in a second and I never think twice about going back. Are there any other people that have heard of faithful alphas or am I just a different breed? Lol

[Ruby Slippers]

I think I might be dating one now. Of course, only time really tells.

 

He's a handsome, smart, independent go-getter who so far seems to be selective, conservative, and loyal.

 

Like you, he's explained being very decisive about immediately and permanently ending things with women who tried to deceive or manipulate him.

 

I think you and he are the kind of guys most women want. You know who you are and what you want, are strong and productive on your own but want a woman to complement your life and bring out your best, and value real love. You have power, but you also have character, so you don't abuse it. You guys are the best of the best

[carhill]

I'd consider myself Alpha and have never really had a desire to cheat or anything close to it.

That actually makes sense and sounds healthy when you think about it. As a generally high demand male, alpha's should never feel a need or desire to cheat. They can simply and quickly end their association and begin another with a desired female immediately. Pure serial monogamy. If I had women circling, that's what I'd do. Clean, honest and successful.

 

For the rest of us, ending associations without pre- or during- cheating usually means some variable period of alone time. For reasons of strongly desiring sex and/or companionship, some men have a hard time being alone and, if they know they will be, monkey-branch, which means cheating, something I define as deceptive sexual and/or emotional associations with people other than their spouse/partner.

 

Kudos to you for your relationship style. You have the freedom to cheat, and easily, and you choose differently.

 

I do know a few faithful alphas amongst my male friends but they're older. It's possible they were not faithful in their younger years, IDK. Most have been married two or more decades now. One can see their style in how they treat women in general.

[ThaWholigan]

Alphas don't have to cheat in a relationship - they are Alphas, they can do what they want! . I know guys who are Alpha who don't cheat - and their wives are very faithful and satisfied.

 

Kudos to you.

[2sunny]

I hear all the time that part of being an alpha male is to cheat in relationships. Well I'd consider myself Alpha and have never really had a desire to cheat or anything close to it.

 

I'm also alpha to the fact that if a girl ever screws me over she's gone in a second and I never think twice about going back. Are there any other people that have heard of faithful alphas or am I just a different breed? Lol

 

Yes, they are around. And yes they are appreciated by me when I know them!

[2sunny]

alpha males don't get caught cheating. we cheat. but no one finds out.

 

Don't be so naive... They get caught all the time.

 

And stop being so mean here.

[SteveC80]

The whloe labeling types of men to me is corny,people are complex

[DreamerDeceiver]

I don't know where this perception that alpha males are "supposed to cheat" came from. Probably from all the frustrated chumps in the PUA community. For me it's the difference between dating around, and choosing to stay committed in a relationship. Because if it ain't working out, I'm out. That wasn't so hard was it?

[Ruby Slippers]

I don't know where this perception that alpha males are "supposed to cheat" came from.

I think a lot of women worry that the most desirable men are more likely to cheat, because they have easy opportunities everywhere to do so. It's the experiences we go through with men that create this worry. I carried this fear myself for a long time, but am working on letting it go. If I don't believe I can meet a good man who will love me and be loyal to me, as I will to him, life's just too depressing.

[Ninjainpajamas]

What I think is funny about this "Alpha" term is that It's only considered from the perspective of women or a man unto himself...and I don't believe in self-labeling yourself in this respect, in fact for the whole Alpha, beta thing is a bit silly because it's used way too often to consolidate separate matters and situations/personalities.

 

For example...personally I think If you are "Alpha" then you display this in everything you do, not just with women...any half-witted fool could consider himself Alpha If he has an emotional investment from a woman because she's likely going to bend to make him happy or try to satisfy his needs or compensate for her insecurity...so that right there negates about 50 percent of the "Alpha" males alone.

 

Secondly, when this "Alpha" is around other males, and another male is more dominant than he is does that make him a "Beta"? I've seen a lot of guys who were confident in their own environments...like in an area they were really good at or successful in but that doesn't mean they get around a group of men and can lead the pack. So that's another way and form this term is debunked because most men I have met that would likely be perceived as Alpha wouldn't be perceived that way by another or other men because men can sense and pick that up, men usually seek someone to lead in certain circumstances of be the first penguin to plunge into the waters to make sure it's clear so to speak.

 

So IMO people are far too generous with the term Alpha male, in most of their descriptions It is clear to me on the basis of that comparison that this man is more of an Alpha-beta If you will than a true Alpha, If we're speaking in the narrow concepts of these comparisons.

 

There's good guys and there's bad guys...most guys will cheat at some point, or would If they had the opportunity sad to say it. I've seen many "good men" make stupid decisions in the moment or with a few beers in them or with a nice hot cushy co-worker that has been stroking his nuts playfully for a while waiting to get her claws on him...and that's the funny thing here as well...women always isolate the men for cheating when who do these men cheat with? IF you think that It's because they "thought" he was single, pleeeease, women get into it then ask questions later...It's ridiculous how women can act so innocent and victimized when so often they knew exactly what they were doing or something was up because there was a huge red flag...both sexes make stupid decisions which is why you find a lot of men who've dated men in relationships and married and a lot of these guys have cheated...It's takes two to tango people, people need to stop pointing the finger and just take responsibility for their own actions or their own fault in being unable to see the situation for what it really was.

 

As man I would NEVER trust everything a man says ever, I don't care who it is, the president, the pope, your grandpapa...I have no idea why women take what men so wholeheartedly and as an absolute truth, at best It's a half-truth or partially but imo not usually the whole truth.

 

When a man tells me he would never cheat, a lot of times I've seen that guy eventually cheat. When a man is married for 30 years and doesn't cheat, that's worth a whole lot more than saying they never would because they haven't had to prove it yet. That's my take on it.

 

If you don't cheat then you don't cheat, you don't have to say it...the truth comes out in time. And that goes for Alpha or Beta males, it doesn't matter...and I don't know about you, but there's not too many men I'd consider Alphas...but I think what is more important is a man with integrity and respect, I think that's what women should focus on for a relationship.

[Phennyphen]

Alpha shmalpha, anyone who calls themself 'Alpha' is the highest form of douchebag. Believe me, if you're alpha, you wont have to tell me about it, I'll know. If you have to inform me, then you're probably not alpha.

 

 

Alpha shmalpha, its a load of ****.

[Quest4_TheLost]

There's good guys and there's bad guys...most guys will cheat at some point, or would If they had the opportunity sad to say it.

 

 

 

You really burst my bubble here!! If this is true then why even bother dating anymore..

[RedRobin]

All the real 'Alphas' I know don't self-identify. They are too busy kicking butt.

 

I'm pretty sure the women they are with aren't identifying them as such either. They are attracted to each other and then...

[MarlyStar]

I was married to one for 14 years, he was very good looking and he never cheated and women were throwing themselves at him all the time. (we broke up over his drinking, even as a drunk he didn't cheat).

 

I know a couple others. Cheating is a character problem. Alpha males who pick the right woman and have character don't cheat.

[Weezy1973]

The term 'Alpha Male" technically has everything to do with mating patterns in various species (I believe mountain and lowland gorillas are the most well known). Essentially, in terms of mating patterns, the Alpha has a) his choice of the best females and b) is never truly monogamous in that he will not mate with one female for life.

 

In humans, Alphas tend to exhibit three main mating patterns. They never get in a committed relationship and have a "harem" (pretty rare); they are in a committed relationship, but cheat (although this is hardly relegated to Alphas, or males for that matter); they are serial monogamists. Culturally, serial monogamy is the most accepted, but biologically it is the most harmful for the females. Serial monogamist males tend to "rob" females of prime reproductive years and then end the relationship for a younger female.

 

My uncle is a good example of an Alpha male that employs serial monogamy. He married his first wife at 18 (got her pregnant), they got divorced when he was in his mid 20s. He then married a beautiful blonde model, had two kids, divorced in his mid 30s. Then he got into a common-law relationship with a 25 year old French stewardess, proposed after 5 years, but called off the wedding finally admitting that he's not the marrying kind. He's now 66 years old and his girlfriend is a 43 year old aerobics instructor.

 

And, let me add, he's never cheated and has never had a desire to cheat. He is kind and loyal with all these women; in fact he's still great friends with them (except the model) and his first wife is very close with my family as is the stewardess.

 

And just a couple more things. Like anything, putting people into categories is kind of foolish. I imagine that true Alphas and true Betas are extremely rare and the vast majority of people fall somewhere in between.

 

All that being said, the plot of many, many romantic comedies is where the Alpha, who can get all the women, finally finds "the one" (i.e. the heroine of the movie), and becomes committed and monogamous for the rest of his life (i.e. behaving like a Beta). In fact, again from a biological perspective, this indeed should be the "perfect scenario." Get the good genes of the Alpha, plus the commitment (i.e. help with rearing the kids). In real life of course, this will never happen, as the true Alpha will never commit for life...

[Ruby Slippers]

I agree that the terms alpha and beta are overused and overgeneralized. When I talk about an alpha guy, I just mean a guy who tends to excel and lead - in his own life, among his peers and the people he works with, in social situations, etc. He doesn't have to be a constant badass - just come out on top most of the time. Other factors like good looks may contribute to leadership, but I think that's the central trait of an alpha male or female.

 

Without that term, the point remains - there are some exceptional, desirable men who have easy opportunities to cheat, but don't want to.

 

I know a couple that's been together for more than 10 years, and will most likely be together for life. He's a total catch, and even though she is open to having an open relationship, he has declined. He says he doesn't want to share her and wouldn't feel right being with others, either.

 

Research has shown that some men have more of the empathy and monogamy genes, and others don't. As I've gone through life and gotten to know more men, it's become clearer where men fall along that spectrum.

[wilsonx]

 

My uncle is a good example of an Alpha male that employs serial monogamy. He married his first wife at 18 (got her pregnant), they got divorced when he was in his mid 20s. He then married a beautiful blonde model, had two kids, divorced in his mid 30s. Then he got into a common-law relationship with a 25 year old French stewardess, proposed after 5 years, but called off the wedding finally admitting that he's not the marrying kind. He's now 66 years old and his girlfriend is a 43 year old aerobics instructor.

 

And, let me add, he's never cheated and has never had a desire to cheat. He is kind and loyal with all these women; in fact he's still great friends with them (except the model) and his first wife is very close with my family as is the stewardess.

 

And just a couple more things. Like anything, putting people into categories is kind of foolish. I imagine that true Alphas and true Betas are extremely rare and the vast majority of people fall somewhere in between.

 

This isnt an alpha male... this is a person that does not know how to be alone. Divorced twice would have been divorced 3 times had he gone through with that 3rd one.