add2718 Posted July 18, 2012 Posted July 18, 2012 I've been seeing my gf about six months now. She is a recovering prescription drug addict and has been going to a methadone clinic for several years (apparently the methadone also helps with her chronic pain). She doesn't drive and often asks me to take her down there in the morning. Either that or she gets her dad to take her (he lives nearby) or someone else. If all else fails she'll take the bus. I believe they give her a free or discounted bus pass each month for this purpose, but I'm not sure. My question is, am I obligated to take her down there? She's not living with me. Basically, I hate the place, it's gross, and even if I'm only waiting in the parking lot for five minutes, it totally puts me off. I don't mean to sound selfish or inconsiderate, but I have no experience with addicts. Our relationship has some other issues but I do love and care about her a lot.
carhill Posted July 18, 2012 Posted July 18, 2012 If my read on the general sentiments in the 'is a wife obligated to have regular sex with her husband' thread is accurate, you should not feel any 'obligation' to do such things for your girlfriend; rather, if you feel your love and care impelling you to want to do it, do it. If not, not. Pay attention to your feelings and how she inspires your love and support. She has other options, like the bus pass. She'll be OK. Have you ever taken her to the doctor who rx'd methadone for pain? I'm assuming the clinic is a cost issue, as it's not necessary for a pain patient. I ask because one person's pain can be another's MMT for opiate dependency. I'd be careful investing here, as well as, if you do love and care for her, investing some time educating yourself about this dynamic (chronic pain, rx med abuse and synthetic opiates). Good luck.
Author add2718 Posted July 18, 2012 Author Posted July 18, 2012 Have you ever taken her to the doctor who rx'd methadone for pain? I'm assuming the clinic is a cost issue, as it's not necessary for a pain patient. I ask because one person's pain can be another's MMT for opiate dependency. Havent met the doctor... she also goes there for therapy sessions... and yes it's a cost issue, she doesnt make much money at all (works at a pizza place)...
Author add2718 Posted July 19, 2012 Author Posted July 19, 2012 BTW, when I kinda blew it in her ear today about how I'd like to not take her down there so much, I got the response "It's okay, **** it, there are plenty of other people at the clinic who can give me rides". Not exactly the response I was hoping for...
carhill Posted July 19, 2012 Posted July 19, 2012 That's OK, man, you're in for a lifetime of that. Buckle in. 1
Author add2718 Posted July 20, 2012 Author Posted July 20, 2012 Sorry about the profanity in my previous post, I didn't know it's not allowed... I also jokingly texted her earlier today about taking the bus over to my place for a change, and she got all defensive about it... saying "every boyfriend I've had has always given me rides" and "it just comes with the territory"... BTW yesterday I went to/from the clinic three times for her... once early in the morning for her dose, then a few hours later for her group session, then to pick her up. Drag
lemonlime Posted July 20, 2012 Posted July 20, 2012 well shes being really honest. If she thinks thats what comes with dating her, you better be prepared to keep doing it, forever. Or make a boundary and tell her you dont want to do it at all. It makes you uncomfortable, and its not ur responsibility. Just know that she may not be willing to be in that position.
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