ramona Posted July 16, 2012 Posted July 16, 2012 So, I haven't really talked to many people about this except my best friend, but she's a girl so I couldn't get the right advice from her. I NEED MALE ADVICE ! There's this guy that I work with, and he's a tad bit older than me (I'm 19 and he's 29) I am going crazy over him but I don't like to show anything until I've seen some signs first.. We're good colleagues and have talks from time to time but have never seen each other outside of work. This is the 2nd summer we've worked together and I haven't seen a concrete sign from him yet, although I'm confused about some things. Now, I don't think that he generally doesn't find me attractive, but I think he wants to keep it as platonic as possible. The thing that confuses me the most is the way he talks/looks at me when I'm a mess (have no make up on and basically just got out of bed and left for work) he's so chatty and witty with me, I even get a wink here and there:love: but when I do my hair and make up and basically get all dressed up it's like there's no contact - at all. He's even avoiding eye contact, which is pretty obvious when I'm talking to him. What's that all about? Could it be that he thinks I'm too young for him and doesn't wanna look at me ''that'' way? I have a hunch about that.. But I don't know. Are there any guys here in that age range that could explain this to me? and possibly a way I could find out?? Your experience with younger girls or similar situations, anything?? I'll go bonkers soon. Thanks!!
dasein Posted July 16, 2012 Posted July 16, 2012 Hey welcome to the forums. Yes, it sounds like he is trying to keep distance due to your age. You also work with him, which could cause some issues on his end. He does sound attracted though, just more comfortable when you are less sexual looking. In your shoes, I'd let it be known where you are going, what you are doing at night. Say something like "you should come there!" If he has any interest, he will eventually either ask to join or just turn up where you have said you will be. Then, once away from work, things tend to be much easier if there's anything there. Are you sure you want to get with an older guy you work with though? Could lead to problems down the road if things don't work out. You didn't say, but if he is a supervisor, or married, bad idea all around. Good luck.
Author ramona Posted July 16, 2012 Author Posted July 16, 2012 To clarify #1. No, he is not married, or my supervisor:sick: Also I don't think working together is the issue as it never is, at my place of work. (I work in a hotel restaurant, there's like 15 of us and something is bound to happen between co-workers here and it does often) To clarify #2. IMO, age doesn't matter all that much if you click so yes I'm sure (I've dated a guy 2 yrs older than him and that wasn't a problem) And lastly, I'd let it be known where you are going, what you are doing at night. Say something like "you should come there!" If he has any interest, he will eventually either ask to join or just turn up where you have said you will be.stuff like this DID happen. but the two of us seeing each other never did.
runner Posted July 16, 2012 Posted July 16, 2012 To clarify #1. No, he is not married, or my supervisor:sick: Also I don't think working together is the issue as it never is, at my place of work. (I work in a hotel restaurant, there's like 15 of us and something is bound to happen between co-workers here and it does often) To clarify #2. IMO, age doesn't matter all that much if you click so yes I'm sure (I've dated a guy 2 yrs older than him and that wasn't a problem) And lastly, stuff like this DID happen. but the two of us seeing each other never did. sounds like he's just a bit gun shy for whatever reason (bad ex-gf, etc.). plan somthing that gets the two of you in the same place outside of work, get yourself closer and see if he picks it up from there. if nothing happens, then move on.
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