LostGirl11 Posted July 15, 2012 Posted July 15, 2012 In a nutshell my ex wants me back and I want him back. We have been broken up for about 3 months now but in that time he has gone on a date. (I haven't) I didn't ask too much about her, maybe I should have? What do you think? Anyway, I did ask the usual things like, how the date went, ect, he told me that she wants to see him again and that shes a nice girl but he doesn't feel the things he felt for me. I don't know what to do, I feel angry for some reason, if I took him back I don't think I'd be able to forget the fact that he went out with someone, and I'd be constantly worried about him contacting her. I do have trust issues. Am I just be stubborn or have I got a good point and reason to worry? Is it all too messy? Or am I being a drama queen?
Acrobaticdealer Posted July 15, 2012 Posted July 15, 2012 If its just one date then I really wouldn't dwell on it. If you've gotten the chance to reconcile(something that many ppl are desperate for) DON'T mess it up by bringing up the past. Fresh start for both of you now go and enjoy it. Lucky
Author LostGirl11 Posted July 15, 2012 Author Posted July 15, 2012 If its just one date then I really wouldn't dwell on it. If you've gotten the chance to reconcile(something that many ppl are desperate for) DON'T mess it up by bringing up the past. Fresh start for both of you now go and enjoy it. Lucky But how can I be sure that he wont stay in contact with her?
Acrobaticdealer Posted July 15, 2012 Posted July 15, 2012 If you love him, you should trust him. Try and talk to him one more time about it and ask for some reassurance. After that, I'd leave it well alone but just keep your mind focused on the good things
Author LostGirl11 Posted July 15, 2012 Author Posted July 15, 2012 If you love him, you should trust him. Try and talk to him one more time about it and ask for some reassurance. After that, I'd leave it well alone but just keep your mind focused on the good things That's the thing, I shouldn't have to ask for it should I? He was too vague. It was odd. I can't explain it
SincereOnlineGuy Posted July 16, 2012 Posted July 16, 2012 All I know is, that you're wasting precious TIME!! The more opportunity he has to invest further IN her, makes it less likely that he would return to you. This has nothing to to with your respective appearances, or where you are in life. Instead it is all about how much he has 'invested' in either of you. So far you have a giant edge, and need only act on it to have things as you would wish. Act now.
Author LostGirl11 Posted July 16, 2012 Author Posted July 16, 2012 All I know is, that you're wasting precious TIME!! The more opportunity he has to invest further IN her, makes it less likely that he would return to you. This has nothing to to with your respective appearances, or where you are in life. Instead it is all about how much he has 'invested' in either of you. So far you have a giant edge, and need only act on it to have things as you would wish. Act now. Argh! I just don't know. I kind of feel like I'm playing second best. If it doesn't work out with me again off he'll run to her. I'm not into silly competitions.
hinatticus Posted July 16, 2012 Posted July 16, 2012 If you have the attitude of being second best, that's the vibe you'll give off. Feel the best, be the best.
Author LostGirl11 Posted July 16, 2012 Author Posted July 16, 2012 If you have the attitude of being second best, that's the vibe you'll give off. Feel the best, be the best. I wish it was that simple lol. Me feeling like I'm not second best doesn't mean that I'm not.
Author LostGirl11 Posted July 17, 2012 Author Posted July 17, 2012 If you have the attitude of being second best, that's the vibe you'll give off. Feel the best, be the best. I wish it was that simple lol. Me feeling like I'm not second best doesn't mean that I'm not.
flitzanu Posted July 17, 2012 Posted July 17, 2012 where exactly is the info about him wanting to be back with you?
Author LostGirl11 Posted July 17, 2012 Author Posted July 17, 2012 where exactly is the info about him wanting to be back with you? He told me. I didn't think I'd have to put every single detail. And I did state 'In a nutshell'
flitzanu Posted July 17, 2012 Posted July 17, 2012 He told me. I didn't think I'd have to put every single detail. And I did state 'In a nutshell' it helps to know "what he said". if he said "omg i miss you" that's not the same thing as "i want to fix all the problems we had and work on our relationship and get back together". but, as to the question, you're never going to know if he stops all communication with her. and i will say, as a guy, if he's being vague about things and not offering info, sounds to me like he's just trying to play both sides. the problem is, if you confront him about it, then YOU look like the psycho ex girlfriend. it's a no-win situation.
Author LostGirl11 Posted July 17, 2012 Author Posted July 17, 2012 it helps to know "what he said". if he said "omg i miss you" that's not the same thing as "i want to fix all the problems we had and work on our relationship and get back together". but, as to the question, you're never going to know if he stops all communication with her. and i will say, as a guy, if he's being vague about things and not offering info, sounds to me like he's just trying to play both sides. the problem is, if you confront him about it, then YOU look like the psycho ex girlfriend. it's a no-win situation. That's what I thought. The whole being vague thing is what stuck out a mile.
Author LostGirl11 Posted July 17, 2012 Author Posted July 17, 2012 No idea what I should do. If I don't ask questions about her it will eat me up inside and if I do I'll look all needy and paranoid!
Author LostGirl11 Posted July 18, 2012 Author Posted July 18, 2012 No idea what I should do. If I don't ask questions about her it will eat me up inside and if I do I'll look all needy and paranoid!
flitzanu Posted July 18, 2012 Posted July 18, 2012 No idea what I should do. If I don't ask questions about her it will eat me up inside and if I do I'll look all needy and paranoid! exactly. but, i think your gut instinct already knows the answer to these questions.
yogamobb Posted July 18, 2012 Posted July 18, 2012 No idea what I should do. If I don't ask questions about her it will eat me up inside and if I do I'll look all needy and paranoid! I was in the same situation. Broke up for 3 months and she started dating another guy. She broke up with him and I took her back, then she cheated on me with him. Very hurt now. I wouldn't do it if I were you. You weren't a priority before and you won't be one now.
Author LostGirl11 Posted July 18, 2012 Author Posted July 18, 2012 exactly. but, i think your gut instinct already knows the answer to these questions. Yep. It a strong gut feeling but when I try to put it into words I can't!!! Which is annoying the hell out of me. He basically wants to know whats going on but how can I tell him when I can't word how I feel!?
Author LostGirl11 Posted July 19, 2012 Author Posted July 19, 2012 exactly. but, i think your gut instinct already knows the answer to these questions. Yep. It a strong gut feeling but when I try to put it into words I can't!!! Which is annoying the hell out of me. He basically wants to know whats going on but how can I tell him when I can't word how I feel!?
flitzanu Posted July 19, 2012 Posted July 19, 2012 Yep. It a strong gut feeling but when I try to put it into words I can't!!! Which is annoying the hell out of me. He basically wants to know whats going on but how can I tell him when I can't word how I feel!? i'd just be honest. tell him you aren't interested anymore and you don't want to get involved, and that you're going to move on without him. he'll beg and argue and call you crazy for being jealous and insecure, blah blah, but as the other poster up there said, these are dangerous situations. he's likely still seeing this other girl, so save yourself the heartache and stress.
Author LostGirl11 Posted July 19, 2012 Author Posted July 19, 2012 i'd just be honest. tell him you aren't interested anymore and you don't want to get involved, and that you're going to move on without him. he'll beg and argue and call you crazy for being jealous and insecure, blah blah, but as the other poster up there said, these are dangerous situations. he's likely still seeing this other girl, so save yourself the heartache and stress. I guess I want to let him know that I know what he is doing ect, so he knows I'm not a naive little girl. But want to keep it short and sweet.
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