lemonlime Posted July 13, 2012 Posted July 13, 2012 I have a four year old son. I had dated my guy since he was 1.5 years old. What do I do to try to help him during this period? Its been less then a week, and hes def noticed. He keeps asking why stuff that was at my bf's is here again. And hes been carrying around a toy he gave him 2 years ago and never played with constantly. I feel terrible
january2011 Posted July 14, 2012 Posted July 14, 2012 I think that you need to give him a reason why your ex is not around anymore that seems reasonable both to him and yourself. You don't need to go into detail about the breakup. Based on my experience of four-year-olds is that they tend to have a very short memory and usually accept explanations as long as they are reasonable - but I think that might also be dependent on the four-year-old in question. I suspect that from your son's point of view, your ex was around a lot and now he's not. He just needs an explanation that covers why this man is no longer in his life. From experience, children can be a lot more robust and reasonable than we give them credit for. I'd also suggest that you remove any triggers (such as the items your son was referring to) that might lead to questions that put you on the spot like this. You're already having to deal with the breakup, so I'd imagine that doing this would help you to move on too.
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