EC Posted July 7, 2004 Posted July 7, 2004 [color=red][/color] Ok so I messed up. I've been going out with this guy for about 4 months now and we were hanging out yesterday eating bagels with him and my brother. Well my brother went to leave and I thought my boyfriend was going with him so I said "Babe aren't you going with him?" and he like "I was but I'd rather just stay here with you" Now you have to understand my bf never says mushy stuff like that and so I was shocked and I said "awe i love you baby your so cute" We've never said I love you before and I didnt even mean to say it, it just cames out. So then I was like oh this bagel is sooo good lol to change the subject but the damage had been done he just stared at me and didnt say anything. I put the tv on and we didnt speak about it. The problem is i know he heard it but I didnt mean to say it and i dont know what hes thinking now. I dont know what to do do I leave it alone and pretend it never happened or do i say something? I'm so confused help!
tattoomytoe Posted July 7, 2004 Posted July 7, 2004 this movie, this bagel, your shirt.....etc... tell him it is a saying.
CurlyIam Posted July 7, 2004 Posted July 7, 2004 The best approach is not to admit anything. Be just as nice and as open as usual. I think he knows the differance between "I love you" and "you're so sweet, I love you". It's not than bad, or that big unless you make it. If he sees no differance in your attitude, he'll relaxe, maybe even make a few jokes about it. Most certainly you don't have to take it back or to want to talk about it and explain. You said it in the thrill of the moment. If he's smart enough, he'll understand. Even be flattered! Just to make you feel better, what you did is nothing comparedto what I did. In French, if you say: "je t'aime beaucoup" or "je t'aime bien" means "I like you a lot", "I really like you". He would say that a few times to me. I knew about "bien", but fall like a fool for "beacoup". And ended up saying "I love you" after a fight over the phone and he froze too ! After a couple of days he realized I didn't know the differance and was glad of it. He is convinced that he made me confess! I'm still mad at him for it, and he still makes fun of me because of it.
dudesomewhere Posted July 7, 2004 Posted July 7, 2004 you know...i've never been afraid to say I love you...however I always wonder how sincere it is coming from another direction...cuz well I have nobody....wahh, boohoo. `I...ain't got no...body, nobody` hehe
HokeyReligions Posted July 7, 2004 Posted July 7, 2004 Next time you talk to him just say something casual like "I hope I didn't scare you the other day when I said I love you. I just feel comfortable with you and thought it was sweet that you were staying with me. We haven't reached that point in our relationship yet and it just slipped out." Something like that may help get you both back on an even keel and relieve the tension. It also shows him that you are honest and upfront about your own mis-steps along the way. Learn to communicate openly and honestly now and that will only help the relationship in the future.
Author EC Posted July 7, 2004 Author Posted July 7, 2004 Yeah i dont want to ignore it because I dont like the tension but im not gonna act psycho about it either. lol Im just gonna b like hey yesterday I slipped get over it . LOL well more than that but you get it. Omg thanx you guys are the best. Now that I hear you guys I realize it aint that serious it can be fixed. I hope everything goes ok.
Max Overclock Posted July 7, 2004 Posted July 7, 2004 LOL....Not trying to create trouble but.... CurlyIam ... you said: The best approach is not to admit anything. Muhahaha! Hence the reason we guys are confused sometimes. The talking about it idea is a great one. If you guys are real close, it won't be hard to explain the situation away! Warm, sultry nights and sun-filled days all! Max
Netprophet Posted July 7, 2004 Posted July 7, 2004 I'll go with Max on this one, guys get confused enough. Talk things out, I'm sure everyone has heard I love you before and had that deer in the headlights look at least once...save him from thinking a car is coming, he might be wondering right now just what you meant, he might have decided you were making a statement no different than I love your shirt, but better safe than sorry. I'm just all about honesty today, I beed cuddling too much lately, when's the NFL start? j/k
nicki Posted July 9, 2004 Posted July 9, 2004 oops, this happened to me a few months ago, about four months into the relationship...but i was actually pretty upset that he didn't say it back... what i did was say something to him the next day about it. i told him that i felt as close to him as i did to my best girl friend, and that i considered her to be someone i loved.. and that i put him in that same category in my mind...i told him that i knew real love between a couple takes longer and we would see if that happened for us down the road...whew, it worked, i could actually see the pressure lift from him face... from then on i acted completely natural, confident and myself...i didn't say 'i love you' again, but my actions were loving....a few months later he told me that he loved me -- i got to say it back, meaning it even more than the first time...it will all work out for you...some guys just need a little time to get comfortable with the whole love thing...
CurlyIam Posted July 9, 2004 Posted July 9, 2004 Originally posted by Max Caress CurlyIam ... you said: "The best approach is not to admit anything" Muhahaha! Hence the reason we guys are confused sometimes. The talking about it idea is a great one. If you guys are real close, it won't be hard to explain the situation away! Warm, sultry nights and sun-filled days all! Max Huh? aaa ... what do you mean?
Author EC Posted July 9, 2004 Author Posted July 9, 2004 So I just now brought it up to him..lol..I know I'm a pocrastinator(can't spell) and well he laughed lol. Not in a bad way but he could'nt believe i was stressing something so minute. He said he had heard it but thought nothing of it because it just sounded like a compliment like something sweet you would say. I told him I do care for him but I'm not ready to say I love you because I'm still "falling" in love with him... but I will say it when I'm ready. He said he understands and that he hopes that when I'm ready i will be saying it to him. AWE (tear) phew...What a close one. I thought I was done for sure. But thank god everything worked out well.
Max Overclock Posted July 9, 2004 Posted July 9, 2004 Judging only by his comments to ya, I think he's a nice guy. Does he seem like a keeper? Max
Triguluous Posted July 9, 2004 Posted July 9, 2004 I told my ex I loved her, but it was for the sake she wouldn't leave me alone about stuff. She wanted me to do things her way(she even said this to me.) VEry dominating. And we were in her car and she was yelling at me for bing goofy. So, I said, I only act like that Cuz I love you. She looked at me and smiled and started to cry. She said she doesn't love me yet, but like its when I say it to her. (I really didn't love her, lover her.) Just wanted her to leave me alone. I'm a smoe
michaeljones Posted July 11, 2004 Posted July 11, 2004 If he feels for you, nothing will change or at least get any worse. If he doesnt, then watch your friendship become distant. But I am sure he likes you! You probably just stunned him a bit, in a good way!!!!
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