Kimmyxo Posted July 11, 2012 Posted July 11, 2012 Okay i literally just joined this website thing just to ask this so any advice would be greatly appreciated. Me and my boyfriend have been together for almost 7 months now. Very soon after getting together i left for university so we don't see each other in person very much at all.. The plan was that he would move here too when he was done with his trade school (he's not finished yet) but anyways for the first few months we were apart he'd text me like 100+ texts a day.. so many that at first i was just overwhelmed and put off.. but eventually we were talking to eachother constantly and he seemed like he genuinely wanted too.. but about 2 weeks ago he sent me i text saying that his ex had messaged him.. we talked about how gross and desperate she was etc but only about 2 days after that his texts became less frequent. it's been gradual but now he might send me 2 or 3 texts a day.. and we haven't talked on the phone or skyped at all.. he doesn't have a job so there really isn't any reason he should be too busy too send off a text every couple of hours or so.. and i know him he always has his phone on him. I figure that if he wants to talk to me he will so i haven't been contacting him first for the past week or so.. the last thing i want is to come across as desperate but he knows that he hasn't been talking to me as much as he should because he actually apologized for it last night.. but the worst part is we do this stupid anniversary thing every month on the 11th (his idea not mine) and every month until now he's called me or sent me a special text.. generally sometime after midnight but he didn't do that last night even tho he was apologizing for not talking at about 1am.. and its 9:50 am now still no text or anything.. i'm sorry because this is probably extremely long but my question really is do you think he's cheating.. or that he maybe he just isn't interested anymore? it's so weird because i always felt that he cared for me so much.. probably even more than i ever cared for him.. anyways i'd really appreciate any sort of reply to this.. thanks
Negative Nancy Posted July 11, 2012 Posted July 11, 2012 since 99% of men cheat (this is scientifically verified), it is very likely that he is one of them.
chunkydunk Posted July 12, 2012 Posted July 12, 2012 hi there, in reply to your message i believe that relationships go in stages, 1st is the lust stage, in other words you cant get enough of each other and some burn out in this stage as everything has happen to fast, 2nd stage is when the relationship levels out, you both feel the same way but sex isnt as often and you dont call each other as often, me personally im in the horlicks stage, after 23 years of marriage the minds willing but the body is to tired after a 12hr shift to even think about it. its not that we have stopped caring about each other its just that our priorities have changed. men are very different to us. girks are bought up really to romanceasize and that really is our downfall. i do hope it work out for you, best option is to ask him straght out, you may not like the reply but at least you will know where you stand. xx
Ami1uwant Posted July 12, 2012 Posted July 12, 2012 Its likely he is interested in someone else...it could be his ex...could be someone else. During the transition in stages it tends to be a slower fade then say going from 100 texts to 3 per day.
Leigh 87 Posted July 13, 2012 Posted July 13, 2012 My partner and I message each other more the more we get to love each other. For us, it has not died down at all. It stas the same. But not all couples are the same. I would personally be upset - if there was a change. I think the key to getting around these problems, is to simpl TALK to him about it; tell him exactl what he situation is like for you. I would tell him " look, things have changed a little, you used to do this, and now you do this...... I just want to know if your feelings have changed, I need you to try to comminucate with me here, and just be honest with me" Guys do not all like talking about their feelings, mine hates it, but if your relationship is to be a strong and healthy one, you should be able to talk about these sort of things - changes in behaviour and how it makes you feel. And he has to be open and honest with you too, for it to last.
Crila16 Posted July 13, 2012 Posted July 13, 2012 Do you want the truth or do you want me to lie? If you're going to ask the question, you need to know the truth. He's definitely talking to some other girl, whether it's his ex or whether it's a new girl. I know it hurts, I know it sucks...but it's the plain truth. Doesn't mean it's going to work with her, because (no offense) young love is so fickle...but you're not the only crayon in the box at the moment. Good news...you're going to hurt cry...and trust me...you're young and I promise, there are hotter, sweeter guys out there to meet. You will look back on this guy and laugh your @ss off. I know you don't believe me right now, but take it from someone who has been there on more than one ocassion. What doesn't kill you makes you stronger.
Radu Posted July 13, 2012 Posted July 13, 2012 since 99% of men cheat (this is scientifically verified), it is very likely that he is one of them. It is also scientifically verified that at least 94% of women cheat. OP, i see a few red flags in your post : - he laughed at another human being, shows a lack of empathy ... that should have made you mad - you are in college, many of those relationships don't last - he has less interest in contacting you I don't know if he's cheating [EA or PA], but i do know is that talking with you is not on top of his list of priorities. I would not be surprised if there is another girl or he is mad at you.
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