quess Posted July 11, 2012 Posted July 11, 2012 i found a decent guy on a dating site and sent an email. he is quite far but according to his profile, he is open to having a penpal/LDR since he is willing to move. we passed along a few emails. he was always very prompt and replied as soon as he saw them. however, he's never viewed my profile, nor has he asked me any questions in the emails. all he did was reply to my questions for him, which is different from other men i've contacted. i also sent him a separate picture of myself since i don't have one uploaded. unlike other men, he's never acknowledged receiving it and made no comment. other guys have at least thanked me for sending one along or have complimented me. absolutely nothing from him. all he did was answer my question, make a comment on something i wrote, and suggested we chat sometime. with a few smilies here and there. so i figured that might mean he's further interested. i replied back - i made a few comments to his email and asked no questions this time around. in the end, i said that we should certainly chat whenever he's up for it - kinda trying to imply the ball in his court. after that message, i got nothing! is this guy interested in further communicating or what? i don't get it. was my picture not good enough? is he shy? is he politely saying "no thanks" in this manner? he's read my msg and he's been logging on but i'm getting nothing. he's a busy guy for sure but i doubt his schedule has anything to do with this. also, i should've asked him to clarify "chat." what is chatting? is this over the phone? online? the site does have an IM chat option. in the past, 1 guy meant phone chat and he gave me his #. i figured if he's truly interested, he'd send another email about how to go about this, or did he expect me to do so? i'm so confused what to do at this point. should i just leave it alone if he never gets back to me? i was thinking if i should just try to log in when he normally does to see if he'd IM me. all in all, we traded 5 short emails in total (2 from him, 3 from me). or is he being this way since i'm far from him and there's no chance of immediately meeting? does anyone know what to do in this case? should i give up? thanks.
HeavenOrHell Posted July 11, 2012 Posted July 11, 2012 He doesn't sound interested, sorry I'd only bother with people who actually sound interested in me, and ask me questions. i found a decent guy on a dating site and sent an email. he is quite far but according to his profile, he is open to having a penpal/LDR since he is willing to move. we passed along a few emails. he was always very prompt and replied as soon as he saw them. however, he's never viewed my profile, nor has he asked me any questions in the emails. all he did was reply to my questions for him, which is different from other men i've contacted. i also sent him a separate picture of myself since i don't have one uploaded. unlike other men, he's never acknowledged receiving it and made no comment. other guys have at least thanked me for sending one along or have complimented me. absolutely nothing from him. all he did was answer my question, make a comment on something i wrote, and suggested we chat sometime. with a few smilies here and there. so i figured that might mean he's further interested. i replied back - i made a few comments to his email and asked no questions this time around. in the end, i said that we should certainly chat whenever he's up for it - kinda trying to imply the ball in his court. after that message, i got nothing! is this guy interested in further communicating or what? i don't get it. was my picture not good enough? is he shy? is he politely saying "no thanks" in this manner? he's read my msg and he's been logging on but i'm getting nothing. he's a busy guy for sure but i doubt his schedule has anything to do with this. also, i should've asked him to clarify "chat." what is chatting? is this over the phone? online? the site does have an IM chat option. in the past, 1 guy meant phone chat and he gave me his #. i figured if he's truly interested, he'd send another email about how to go about this, or did he expect me to do so? i'm so confused what to do at this point. should i just leave it alone if he never gets back to me? i was thinking if i should just try to log in when he normally does to see if he'd IM me. all in all, we traded 5 short emails in total (2 from him, 3 from me). or is he being this way since i'm far from him and there's no chance of immediately meeting? does anyone know what to do in this case? should i give up? thanks.
Aquamelon Posted July 11, 2012 Posted July 11, 2012 i found a decent guy on a dating site and sent an email. he is quite far but according to his profile, he is open to having a penpal/LDR since he is willing to move. we passed along a few emails. he was always very prompt and replied as soon as he saw them. however, he's never viewed my profile, nor has he asked me any questions in the emails. all he did was reply to my questions for him, which is different from other men i've contacted. i also sent him a separate picture of myself since i don't have one uploaded. unlike other men, he's never acknowledged receiving it and made no comment. other guys have at least thanked me for sending one along or have complimented me. absolutely nothing from him. all he did was answer my question, make a comment on something i wrote, and suggested we chat sometime. with a few smilies here and there. so i figured that might mean he's further interested. i replied back - i made a few comments to his email and asked no questions this time around. in the end, i said that we should certainly chat whenever he's up for it - kinda trying to imply the ball in his court. after that message, i got nothing! is this guy interested in further communicating or what? i don't get it. was my picture not good enough? is he shy? is he politely saying "no thanks" in this manner? he's read my msg and he's been logging on but i'm getting nothing. he's a busy guy for sure but i doubt his schedule has anything to do with this. also, i should've asked him to clarify "chat." what is chatting? is this over the phone? online? the site does have an IM chat option. in the past, 1 guy meant phone chat and he gave me his #. i figured if he's truly interested, he'd send another email about how to go about this, or did he expect me to do so? i'm so confused what to do at this point. should i just leave it alone if he never gets back to me? i was thinking if i should just try to log in when he normally does to see if he'd IM me. all in all, we traded 5 short emails in total (2 from him, 3 from me). or is he being this way since i'm far from him and there's no chance of immediately meeting? does anyone know what to do in this case? should i give up? thanks. You're getting too stressed out. I honestly did the whole dating website thing for 7 months and took away one thing - all guys respond differently. You said he didn't see your profile, some sites have the option available where it makes so that people can't tell whether or not they have looked at you. And I'm sure your picture was fine. But honestly it does sound like he might not be interested. To be fair and account for things such as a busy schedule, give it a week. If he doesn't try to make contact with you then I'd say completely move on. DO NOT contact him again, like you said the ball is in his court. You've made it clear enough you want to chat again. In the meantime, seek other people out on the dating website you're using and take your mind off of this one guy. Edit: I don't know what site you're using but I found plentyoffish.com interesting if nothing else. Met about 10 guys and ended up dating a guy for 2 years from meeting him through there. Worth a shot if you haven't tried it.
justwhoiam Posted July 12, 2012 Posted July 12, 2012 What I would think: he gets lots of messages/emails/contacts. Just like you liked this guy, many others liked this very same guy. He's trying to keep up with the whole thing, but men are not very good at that. He was truly interested in getting to know you, but things pile up and your name was not on top of his list. Who got on top of the list? Women who stand out for practical reasons. Those who are on when he's on, who live near where he lives, who are able to get in touch more often and get to make it personal. What I would do: I'd try to sign on when he's on and see if he starts any contact. Probably not. After that, I would email him the question (by chat did you mean on phone or through messenger? sorry but I'm not very internet savvy) and see what he says. Good luck
Ami1uwant Posted July 12, 2012 Posted July 12, 2012 I agree with the others..... If they dont ask you questions and just reply to you they may try being polite for now but have you slowly fade. It may have been our picture...or your distance. Its also likely he has been talking to many other people who are closer geographically to him so they will take priority.
Recommended Posts