Woggle Posted July 10, 2012 Posted July 10, 2012 I am asking this because my coworker who is one of the biggest misogynists I have met said that men either have two choices. They can be either the man a woman wants to marry or the man a woman wants to have sex with and the two will never meet and that it is much better for a man to be the one she wants to have sex with because she will treat him much better. Is this true.
Ruby Slippers Posted July 10, 2012 Posted July 10, 2012 I am wildly attracted to the guy I'm dating right now, and I get the impression he would be a wonderful husband and father. The second part is what makes me want to keep seeing him. 1
xxoo Posted July 10, 2012 Posted July 10, 2012 Is this true. No. Sexual attraction would never last, for me, if he isn't also a loving partner. Woggle, is this the same coworker you've been talking about for years? Why do you continue to be her audience?
ThaWholigan Posted July 10, 2012 Posted July 10, 2012 I am asking this because my coworker who is one of the biggest misogynists I have met said that men either have two choices. They can be either the man a woman wants to marry or the man a woman wants to have sex with and the two will never meet and that it is much better for a man to be the one she wants to have sex with because she will treat him much better. Is this true? Not necessarily. It can be a reality for many, and I myself have questioned this in light of some of the things I have seen go down in the relationships of people around me, but it actually doesn't have to be in my personal observations. The main problem that guys have is they keep coming to the conclusion that there is one or the other, and it actually isn't. Being nice doesn't even come into the equation in my opinion. Niceness is just a general politeness you show everyone, not just women. That doesn't mean you cannot be ruthless when you need to be, it doesn't mean you don't have boundaries that you will defend assertively and strongly - and it DOESN'T mean you cannot incorporate traits and behaviors to complement your core character. A good husband type is way too broad to be pigeon-holed as some needy, pseudo-provider beta-male that it is always referred to on the internet. You can be a good husband and not take anybody's sh*t. You can treat your wife well without letting her boss you around or whatever. 3
Algermas Posted July 10, 2012 Posted July 10, 2012 No. Sexual attraction would never last, for me, if he isn't also a loving partner. Woggle, is this the same coworker you've been talking about for years? Why do you continue to be her audience? Who gave you the impression we need your sexual attraction to last past a few good lays?
wheream_i Posted July 10, 2012 Posted July 10, 2012 I am asking this because my coworker who is one of the biggest misogynists I have met said that men either have two choices. They can be either the man a woman wants to marry or the man a woman wants to have sex with and the two will never meet and that it is much better for a man to be the one she wants to have sex with because she will treat him much better. Is this true. I tend to agree with it. Maybe not 100% but I agree with it. Women can be viewed the same way. You have this attractive yet plain woman, educated, demure, dresses like a lady. And you have this hussy who's tattooed, whore-red lipstick, sex in high heels, looks like she could suck the chrome off a bumper. Just lusty as all get out. Which one you taking home to momma? But don't take my word for it. Just read some of the threads here about women complaining about their lame ass husbands or the men complaining about their wives stopped sucking c*ck as soon as the wedding ring went on.
ThaWholigan Posted July 10, 2012 Posted July 10, 2012 EDIT: Didn't actually add to my post about the actual topic! Any man can be sexually attractive if he knows how to incorporate a level of sex appeal into his character. Emphasizing your strengths, your attractive traits, improving your physique, movement, body language, using your words well (clever, subtle, risque, seductive etc), being exciting, being able to engage her mind at will.......
WonderKid Posted July 10, 2012 Posted July 10, 2012 I tend to agree with it. Maybe not 100% but I agree with it. Women can be viewed the same way. You have this attractive yet plain woman, educated, demure, dresses like a lady. And you have this hussy who's tattooed, whore-red lipstick, sex in high heels, looks like she could suck the chrome off a bumper. Just lusty as all get out. Which one you taking home to momma? But don't take my word for it. Just read some of the threads here about women complaining about their lame ass husbands or the men complaining about their wives stopped sucking c*ck as soon as the wedding ring went on. ^^^ Those threads scare me. I say I'll never get married but you never know what happens.
Author Woggle Posted July 10, 2012 Author Posted July 10, 2012 No. Sexual attraction would never last, for me, if he isn't also a loving partner. Woggle, is this the same coworker you've been talking about for years? Why do you continue to be her audience? This is a new guy they hired. His ex wife betrayed him and is always trying to give advice to the younger guys on women.
ThaWholigan Posted July 10, 2012 Posted July 10, 2012 ^^^ Those threads scare me. I say I'll never get married but you never know what happens. They don't scare me at all, I read them and chuckle at the amount of times I've seen similar situations play out in my young life. I believe myself to be of strong will and masculinity, enough that I will choose my partner wisely, and be able to satisfy her more than enough, and that she will in turn reciprocate just as much. Nothing that I have ever read on the internet has convinced me otherwise. 2
WonderKid Posted July 10, 2012 Posted July 10, 2012 This is a new guy they hired. His ex wife betrayed him and is always trying to give advice to the younger guys on women. I get a lot of veteran guys like that. They have been played or have been playing women and try to school me on it. If I posted the 'advice' on LS. I don't think it would be favorable.
xxoo Posted July 10, 2012 Posted July 10, 2012 This is a new guy they hired. His ex wife betrayed him and is always trying to give advice to the younger guys on women. Oh, sorry for assuming!
Lonely Ronin Posted July 10, 2012 Posted July 10, 2012 ThaWholigan has it 100% correct. Woggle, Your co-worker is a moron stop listening to him.
zengirl Posted July 10, 2012 Posted July 10, 2012 I could never be sexually attracted to a man who wasn't LTR/marriage type material personally. That's always been my type. I'm sure there are plenty of women like Ruby's example who are sexually attracted but only stick around if someone is a potential loving partner. And yes there are probably some women at the other end of the spectrum (women who have some issues, I'd say, same as the guys who have the Madonna/Whore issues) who couldn't get hot for a guy who was R material. But those sound like some dangerous women to date who are probably not emotionally available anyway.
pteromom Posted July 10, 2012 Posted July 10, 2012 Deep down every woman wants to get married. !!!! No. Once I get out of my marriage, I will NEVER do it again.
pteromom Posted July 10, 2012 Posted July 10, 2012 They can be either the man a woman wants to marry or the man a woman wants to have sex with and the two will never meet and that it is much better for a man to be the one she wants to have sex with because she will treat him much better. Is this true. I don't believe it is true. There ARE certainly men who are the "Mr. Right Now" type. The type a woman has fun with and sleeps with but knows that's as far as it goes. But the best option is a guy who is kind and respectful and loving (husband type) who also knows how to open up and be fun and sexy. I think that is what most women are looking for. I love guys who are sweet and quiet until you get them behind closed doors.
pteromom Posted July 10, 2012 Posted July 10, 2012 And as far as a woman treating a sex-only guy better, I don't think that's true either. It depends on the woman, and on how the guy treats her.
Curtis24 Posted July 10, 2012 Posted July 10, 2012 No, its not true. Women prefer handsome men. Handsome men *tend* to sleep around(but not always!) Less attractive men observe this, and falsely believe that women are attracted to the bad behavior - rather than the reality, which is that women tolerate promiscuity from goodlooking men. That being said, there is no choice. We play the hand we're dealt. If you don't have the facial symmetry, trying to be a playboy will make you creepy.
pteromom Posted July 10, 2012 Posted July 10, 2012 Women prefer handsome men. Handsome men *tend* to sleep around(but not always!) Less attractive men observe this, and falsely believe that women are attracted to the bad behavior - rather than the reality, which is that women tolerate promiscuity from goodlooking men. Good observation. In addition to the looks, it is the confidence and charisma that many handsome men have (which CAN come off as that "bad boy" vibe). And I have met guys who are objectively unattractive who have those attributes and have women swarming them.
AD1980 Posted July 10, 2012 Posted July 10, 2012 No, its not true. Women prefer handsome men. Handsome men *tend* to sleep around(but not always!) Less attractive men observe this, and falsely believe that women are attracted to the bad behavior - rather than the reality, which is that women tolerate promiscuity from goodlooking men. That being said, there is no choice. We play the hand we're dealt. If you don't have the facial symmetry, trying to be a playboy will make you creepy. I agree i dont know any women who like jerks its just that if youre a good looking dude u can get away with acting badly with women and others where if a unattractive guy does the same thign hed be labeled a jerk or creep..
Lonely Ronin Posted July 11, 2012 Posted July 11, 2012 I love guys who are sweet and quiet until you get them behind closed doors. I think this is pretty much true regardless of gender.
Anela Posted July 11, 2012 Posted July 11, 2012 I could never be sexually attracted to a man who wasn't LTR/marriage type material personally. That's always been my type. Same here. I know that I used to get weak in the knees when a certain guy talked in terms of stability. He was talking about building something from the ground up, and making sure there were no cracks in the foundation, advancing in his work (because he loved it at the time), buying a house, etc. When he talked about travelling around the world with no ties to anything or anyone - that was when he lost me. Anything related to Tyler Durden, and Fight Club, lost me, too. He tried to sound tough, and it sounded ridiculous. I preferred him when he wasn't trying to be the type of man that every woman was "supposed" to be attracted to.
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