socrushed Posted July 9, 2012 Share Posted July 9, 2012 (edited) this is my first thread about her... http://www.loveshack.org/forums/romantic/dating/327787-women-have-you-ever-led-guy-intentionally basically there's this girl that flirts with me a lot half a year ago at work. I got really heart broken when i asked her out and she brushed me off. Her words said yes but her actions said no, she ignores my texts and calls. So I cold shouldered her and she tried to get me to open up at first but after a while she was just like "whatever that's fine". and then I worked another shift and haven't seen her again since. until recently, i saw her again after 6 months, and the first thing she did was resume her super flirty personality. Smiling, eye contact the WHOLE time, constantly twirling her hair aggressively as if she were really nervous and into me, initiating all the conversation and acting very interested in what i have to say. i excused myself 3min into the conversation because it was too intense for me, i'd fall for her all over again. Then when i came back someone pointed out that i had a hickey on my neck and she suddenly got very quiet. She would normally be the type to poke fun at everything and always be joking around, but she didn't say ANYTHING about it. Just sat there and laughed at people poking fun at me for finally "getting some"(i have a reputation for being a virgin who's bad with girls...), but no words... then i would see her once a week after that, and she didn't treat me like she did before. no flirtiness at all, just says hi if we walk right past each other. usually, if i'm at a distance, she would normally scream out HI really loudly, but she doesn't say anything anymore. so she's not attracted to me to go out on a date with me, but she's not talking to me because she thinks i'm seeing someone else? wtf. why??? Edited July 9, 2012 by socrushed Link to post Share on other sites
InJest Posted July 9, 2012 Share Posted July 9, 2012 Start hitting on her overtly. If she still doesn't want to talk, then ignore her. Link to post Share on other sites
Author socrushed Posted July 9, 2012 Author Share Posted July 9, 2012 she hurt my feelings too much for me to have the energy to even approach her. the only time we'd talk is if she's the one initiating it, and she doesn't initiate anymore and only says hi if she absolutely has to in order to not appear rude. Link to post Share on other sites
InJest Posted July 9, 2012 Share Posted July 9, 2012 So what then? You just came here to sulk?? No one feels sorry for you. Grow some balls or get over it. Link to post Share on other sites
Author socrushed Posted July 9, 2012 Author Share Posted July 9, 2012 So what then? You just came here to sulk?? No one feels sorry for you. Grow some balls or get over it. i did want to vent, yes. And I don't expect anyone to feel sorry for me, i'm just another faceless name on this forum. I was seeing if anyone has some insight on her behavior. i'm a paranoid person with anxiety issues. Right now, my guess is she didnt actually like me as a person, and found it amusing that i was smitten by her and decided it was fun to take advantage. when she figured I was over her, she lost interest and didn't bother talking to me anymore. is that about right? Link to post Share on other sites
sid3 Posted July 9, 2012 Share Posted July 9, 2012 i did want to vent, yes. And I don't expect anyone to feel sorry for me, i'm just another faceless name on this forum. I was seeing if anyone has some insight on her behavior. i'm a paranoid person with anxiety issues. Right now, my guess is she didnt actually like me as a person, and found it amusing that i was smitten by her and decided it was fun to take advantage. when she figured I was over her, she lost interest and didn't bother talking to me anymore. is that about right? Yes, that's about right. She liked the attention and control she perceived. When she learned that you had other interests it burst her bubble. So what have you learned from this so it becomes a good experience and actually helps you become more succesful with the ladies? Link to post Share on other sites
Author socrushed Posted July 10, 2012 Author Share Posted July 10, 2012 i don't know. if that's the case of what's really going on, then i guess I just learned to never trust anyone. she was really nice to me before and i thought we had a bigger sister/little brother thing going on with her being way more experienced than me, and with me acting clearly depressed all the time and she would always talk to me to cheer me up. whatever. Link to post Share on other sites
sid3 Posted July 10, 2012 Share Posted July 10, 2012 i don't know. if that's the case of what's really going on, then i guess I just learned to never trust anyone. she was really nice to me before and i thought we had a bigger sister/little brother thing going on with her being way more experienced than me, and with me acting clearly depressed all the time and she would always talk to me to cheer me up. whatever. No, not whatever. You should have learned to not put all your eggs in one basket. A man with no other options isn't deemed all that attractive. I wouldnt say not to trust people anymore. Trust is earned over a period of time, trust your instincts more. Link to post Share on other sites
Author socrushed Posted July 10, 2012 Author Share Posted July 10, 2012 No, not whatever. You should have learned to not put all your eggs in one basket. A man with no other options isn't deemed all that attractive. I wouldnt say not to trust people anymore. Trust is earned over a period of time, trust your instincts more. sure. i could learn that i should always be on the lookout for other women and not dwell on just one. what do you mean by trust my instincts though? when we first started talking, all i saw was a very nice pretty outgoing lady who gave me lots of attention and cheered me up whenever i felt sad. A lady who's probably had a rough life and still is able to be happy and optimistic. so my instincts were telling me this is a really nice person who would never do anything to hurt me, and when she started flirting with me, there's no way she would be doing this just for the attention because that would be hurting me. if anything, i learned not to trust my instincts.. or women. Link to post Share on other sites
sid3 Posted July 10, 2012 Share Posted July 10, 2012 sure. i could learn that i should always be on the lookout for other women and not dwell on just one. what do you mean by trust my instincts though? when we first started talking, all i saw was a very nice pretty outgoing lady who gave me lots of attention and cheered me up whenever i felt sad. A lady who's probably had a rough life and still is able to be happy and optimistic. so my instincts were telling me this is a really nice person who would never do anything to hurt me, and when she started flirting with me, there's no way she would be doing this just for the attention because that would be hurting me. if anything, i learned not to trust my instincts.. or women. Nothing can hurt a man as much as a woman, the opposite likely holds true for them. You mentioned a sense of a brother/sister type feel in am earlier post. Seems you were having some doubts as to your interactions. Part of reading the opposite sex, at least in my opinion, is theres little doubt when theyre really interested in you. Hopefully you can take something good from your experience, if not now, then down the road. Link to post Share on other sites
Author socrushed Posted July 10, 2012 Author Share Posted July 10, 2012 well, i'm atually mostly over her. over the past months i've realized how much of a bitch i'm being to be yearning for some girl who doesn't care about me. there's still some unresolved emotions going on though. I still have an urge to at least be her friend, yet i can't talk to her anymore without feeling hurt. that's why i keep thinking about what's going on in her head. Link to post Share on other sites
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