KansasChica Posted July 9, 2012 Posted July 9, 2012 I don't understand my ex at all. We didn't end on bad terms. I was his first serious girlfriend and I'm looking for something more serious than he is apparently. We were friends before we dated...gave each other space after our breakup, which was 7 months ago. We started communicating again about a month ago. I never said anything bad about him... but we have two mutual guy "friends" (who have both expressed interest in me since the breakup and who i've turned down) who are going back and telling my ex bad things that I've supposedly said. They're not even close with my ex though. None of them are true. My ex and I cared about each other a great deal. We both shared with each other more than either of us had shared with anyone. He just wants to believe I'm a bad person though. Is he just trying to justify his breaking up with me?
Author KansasChica Posted July 9, 2012 Author Posted July 9, 2012 Sorry, didn't mean to generalize all guys in the title... just my ex basically.
hinatticus Posted July 9, 2012 Posted July 9, 2012 Unless my ex told me otherwise I'd believe what the dudes said to me. Unless obviously it was something crazy outlandish. He's probably hurting and hearing more bad stuff is upsetting him more. If somebody came up to me and said my ex said this and that about me I might be afraid to confront her incase what was said was true. More likely than not I'd confront her tho. Unless I was in indifference stage and didn't care what my ex was saying.
AlexanderJames Posted July 10, 2012 Posted July 10, 2012 Who knows! He might be gullible, maybe he's looking for a means to justify the split because he's feeling guilty or in a low point. Maybe his "mates" are very convincing. All you can do is tell him none of it is true, if you are still in contact. I wouldnt go out of my way and break NC I dont think. Or maybe just a "Sorry to contact you but I wanted to reassure you that none of the things you are hearing about me are true. Your "friends" are feeling spiteful because they both struck out with me so they are trying to bring me down with them." But then not responding to replies from him to show that you dont care whether he believes it or not. At the end of the day he's going to think what he wants to get him wherever he wants to be. Guy's dont always just believe what they want though trust me. When I hear things about my ex I tend to believe them because I'm hurting over her. Sometimes even just the "idea" that something MIGHT be happening that I havent even heard of makes me sad and makes me think it's happened. I think it's the mind trying to make sense of a confusing situation by sucking in any possible piece of info it can find. True or false. I personally find Womens motives and thought processes to be infinitely more confusing and frustrating than mens. Maybe because I am a man, but mostly because of the S*** I'm going through at the moment -_-.
Xjusticenlossx Posted July 12, 2012 Posted July 12, 2012 I agree, if he truly knows you...then he wont believe the hype. And he will try to hammer things out. I think alot if break ups involve just sitting diwn and hammering things out.
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