truth_seeker Posted July 9, 2012 Posted July 9, 2012 Would a woman who is average looking, with an average body pass on a relatively good-looking man, with a good body?
Ruby Slippers Posted July 9, 2012 Posted July 9, 2012 I used to disqualify myself from dating guys who were too good-looking. It took me till about the age of 35 to get over that. I'm dating a very cute guy now. I can't say I never feel any insecurity about it, but I do a way better job of not worrying about it and just enjoying than I used to. What helps is that he seems to have a pretty good idea of how cute he is, but doesn't let it go to his head. He could just coast on his looks, but he spends most of his time developing his career and his mind, which I love.
Philosoraptor Posted July 9, 2012 Posted July 9, 2012 To each their own. Just because someone is attractive doesn't mean they are giving off the type of vibe that this person is interested in. 1
Lonely Ronin Posted July 9, 2012 Posted July 9, 2012 I can't say I never feel any insecurity about it, but I do a way better job of not worrying about it and just enjoying than I used to. What makes you fell insecure?
Ruby Slippers Posted July 9, 2012 Posted July 9, 2012 What makes you fell insecure? He's good-looking, smart, charming, sexy, successful. He's also 5 years younger. He could have his pick of cuties across the spectrum. Women love him and flirt with him all the time. More options = more opportunity and temptation to explore them. But his character and personality are working in his favor. He's nice to the women who flirt with him, but never flirts back. He told me he's had the desire for something serious and lasting for a while, but hasn't yet dated someone he felt was a real match. We seem like a great match so far, and even though he could probably get a hotter girl, I'm not so sure he could find someone who rings all his bells (physical, intellectual, emotional, spiritual) like I do. 1
Author truth_seeker Posted July 9, 2012 Author Posted July 9, 2012 This is amazing to me. So if a man who has his act together, is attractive, displays genuine interest in a woman, she will avoid him, turn him down because she is afraid he will hurt her?
Philosoraptor Posted July 9, 2012 Posted July 9, 2012 This is amazing to me. So if a man who has his act together, is attractive, displays genuine interest in a woman, she will avoid him, turn him down because she is afraid he will hurt her? Sure it happens. But that's not the girl who's ready for the type of relationship you're going for anyways. 1
Ruby Slippers Posted July 9, 2012 Posted July 9, 2012 This is amazing to me. So if a man who has his act together, is attractive, displays genuine interest in a woman, she will avoid him, turn him down because she is afraid he will hurt her? An insecure woman will. But I think even secure women are aware that the most desirable men have more options and more temptation to explore them - same for the most desirable women. This is just reality.
callingyouuu Posted July 9, 2012 Posted July 9, 2012 This is amazing to me. So if a man who has his act together, is attractive, displays genuine interest in a woman, she will avoid him, turn him down because she is afraid he will hurt her? As a guy who has avoided attractive, smart, lovely women in the past as he works past his own insecurities, it actually makes complete sense to me. 1
Author truth_seeker Posted July 9, 2012 Author Posted July 9, 2012 Sure it happens. But that's not the girl who's ready for the type of relationship you're going for anyways. What if she says she is but acts insecure?
WonderKid Posted July 9, 2012 Posted July 9, 2012 I've had a few insecure women in the past and I just don't click with them. I know we're human and have our feelings, but I'm good at reading people, and if I sense the woman is insecure I try and build her up. But if she just keep denying it and acting like "this is a dream" it gets a bit annoying to me and I leave it alone.
Philosoraptor Posted July 9, 2012 Posted July 9, 2012 What if she says she is but acts insecure? Actions usually display the truth that the words try to cover. 1
irc333 Posted July 9, 2012 Posted July 9, 2012 Would a woman who is average looking, with an average body pass on a relatively good-looking man, with a good body? A woman like this actually benefited me in the fact that she never pursued attractive men, because of a REVERSE stereotype she had of them. Basically, she figured most very good looking men are players or not loyal, so specifically avoided them and dated men that looked more average like myself. Pretty rare, but it does happen.
Author truth_seeker Posted July 9, 2012 Author Posted July 9, 2012 Actions usually display the truth that the words try to cover. Examples of actions over words?
Philosoraptor Posted July 9, 2012 Posted July 9, 2012 Examples of actions over words? Pretty much anything where someone says one thing and does another. When someone says they don't want to be with someone yet can't keep their hands off of them. Someone who says they want someone yet make no effort to be with them. In your case someone who says they want something real yet is too scared to open themselves up to it. Words are words but love is a verb. 2
SpiralOut Posted July 10, 2012 Posted July 10, 2012 Yes. I used to do this. Even though it was sometimes obvious that he liked me I just could not believe someone like him could like someone like me. I am finally realizing how ridiculous it is for me to think that way. 2
ohmygoshistalk Posted July 10, 2012 Posted July 10, 2012 good looking good bod is just icing to me and not the cake.. i have to feel secure with him..i need to know he genuinely likes me and that im not just means to an end for him.
Affliction Shirt Posted July 10, 2012 Posted July 10, 2012 Don't feel like you're good enough for someone and you feel insecure? Let it motivate you into physically becoming a better person. Promise your partner that you WILL improve and that his/her investment will pay off. You have to at least try to get on their level and make that commitment. Don't just accept your genes, please make the effort to use the resources and technology available. For guys: -roid it up and then get surgery if you decide you need it OR -go natural, gain the weight properly, and then get surgery if you need it For girls: -get in shape and then get surgery if you decide you need it 1
Negative Nancy Posted July 10, 2012 Posted July 10, 2012 Don't feel like you're good enough for someone and you feel insecure? Let it motivate you into physically becoming a better person. Promise your partner that you WILL improve and that his/her investment will pay off. You have to at least try to get on their level and make that commitment. Don't just accept your genes, please make the effort to use the resources and technology available. For guys: -roid it up and then get surgery if you decide you need it OR -go natural, gain the weight properly, and then get surgery if you need it For girls: -get in shape and then get surgery if you decide you need it solid advise! an additional one for the guys that's guaranteed to make women drop down on their knees: - wear an xxs affliction shirt 1
Disenchantedly Yours Posted July 10, 2012 Posted July 10, 2012 I've had a few insecure women in the past and I just don't click with them. I know we're human and have our feelings, but I'm good at reading people, and if I sense the woman is insecure I try and build her up. But if she just keep denying it and acting like "this is a dream" it gets a bit annoying to me and I leave it alone. I think that's pretty understandable Wonderkid.
Disenchantedly Yours Posted July 10, 2012 Posted July 10, 2012 Would a woman who is average looking, with an average body pass on a relatively good-looking man, with a good body? Yes. If you don't believe you are good enough for someone, you might let the oppurtunity pass. I have. I think this goes for looks, income levels, education....and so on. Although, if people pushed through some of those barriers, there might be some really great relationships out there. Easier said then done. Sometimes we get very specific ideas about what we thing is "equal" or what "makes sense". My one friend enjoyed telling me about how her Mom in high school was a nerd and picked on by a bunch of "mean girl" types but her Mom ended up with the "hot guy jock" in school, he married her and they are going strong for a number of years now.
Affliction Shirt Posted July 10, 2012 Posted July 10, 2012 - wear an xxs affliction shirt pffft, only scrawny amateurs off the juice wear XXL. XXXL+ is where it's at. Also, I can't believe this name wasn't taken. A million different dbags have trolled these forums and I'm the first one to claim "Affliction Shirt" Affliction > Tapout btw. Always.
sonrisa Posted July 10, 2012 Posted July 10, 2012 Would a woman who is average looking, with an average body pass on a relatively good-looking man, with a good body? Yes! Me, The very rare times a very handsome man hitting on me I tend to ignore the signs, I'm always thinking it is either in my head or he's just playing games because he knows he's attractive. I'm always wondering why me ? when there are so many beautiful women around.
denise_xo Posted July 10, 2012 Posted July 10, 2012 This is amazing to me. So if a man who has his act together, is attractive, displays genuine interest in a woman, she will avoid him, turn him down because she is afraid he will hurt her? I was guilty of what you describe in the OP when I was younger. It was not so much an issue of being afraid of getting hurt, it was more that it was completely unthinkable to me that he would pay me any serious attention. 2
Curtis24 Posted July 10, 2012 Posted July 10, 2012 It depends on the woman. I'm sure some would, others would have more confidence.
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