Nicomis Posted July 9, 2012 Posted July 9, 2012 I am aware that at first glance this may seem like a ridiculous idea, but I have actually been made aware of some folks with O.L.D. profiles that have their profession listed as "in between jobs". I have seen 3 women's profiles myself, and a friend said she has seen a couple of guys with the same. Recently,I ran into a former client with whom I had struck up a casual friendship with. He was laid off from his job, and had been living on unemployment. He told me the girl he had been seeing for about 3 months had broken up with him the day before, and she had cited that he "shouldn't be seeing anyone right now, because he could "no longer afford to do the things she likes to do". He had been on unemployment for a month. Now honestly, I think there is some merrit to what she said, and he should be concentrating on finding work instead of dating, but Wow what a heartless bitch! I am just curious, men or women, would you start dating someone who was unemployed, or continue to date them if they became unemployed? And early on in dating, for how long is it still OK to stop seeing someone for that reason? I ask because so many are without jobs right now, and the jobless need love too I guess.
Philosoraptor Posted July 9, 2012 Posted July 9, 2012 A job isn't as important as their work ethic. I couldn't date someone who had no aspirations but would have no issue dating someone who was in between work. 1
ThaWholigan Posted July 9, 2012 Posted July 9, 2012 It's worse when you live with your parents AND you're unemployed. Trust me Very soon, I won't be unemployed anyway .........
FitChick Posted July 9, 2012 Posted July 9, 2012 I wouldn't date someone unemployed because, having been unemployed at times myself, people are under a lot of stress. Dating someone under a lot of stress just adds to your own stress. They need to focus on getting work first. You can't live on love alone. A lot of people are unemployed and it's unlikely to change in the near future. It might spur some on to become entrepreneurs or inventors. "Necessity is the mother of invention." 1
truth_seeker Posted July 9, 2012 Posted July 9, 2012 I would be concerned as the person might be lazy or looking to use me as a crutch, ie, pay for meals, help out with their bills.
Author Nicomis Posted July 9, 2012 Author Posted July 9, 2012 I wouldn't date someone unemployed because, having been unemployed at times myself, people are under a lot of stress. Dating someone under a lot of stress just adds to your own stress. They need to focus on getting work first. You can't live on love alone. A lot of people are unemployed and it's unlikely to change in the near future. It might spur some on to become entrepreneurs or inventors. "Necessity is the mother of invention." Being laid off back in 2008 led me to go back to school, get a degree, and start my own business. Cheers to others with the drive and dedication to do so. 1
ThaWholigan Posted July 9, 2012 Posted July 9, 2012 Being laid off back in 2008 led me to go back to school, get a degree, and start my own business. Cheers to others with the drive and dedication to do so. Going self-employed myself - although without the degree. I don't really know what to get a degree in yet, but I'm edging towards something to do with science.
Author Nicomis Posted July 9, 2012 Author Posted July 9, 2012 Going self-employed myself - although without the degree. I don't really know what to get a degree in yet, but I'm edging towards something to do with science. Go for something you love, so you don't lose interest, and remember, any science degree will require a lot of math. (I have an art degree, and they made me take two algebra classes). Math Suuuuucks! 1
oaks Posted July 9, 2012 Posted July 9, 2012 I've dated while being unemployed myself, but I was neither too poor to date (having saved against such an eventuality so that I didn't have to rely on state handouts) nor too lazy to try to find work. It was a problem for some people. This month I'm working and barely have time to do grocery shopping. Maybe I should take some more time off so that I have time to date.
carhill Posted July 9, 2012 Posted July 9, 2012 If a lady had the ability to run a tri-merge on me, she'd note the return that my last employment record was in 1986. In general, the lack of a brick and mortar employer with a pay stub has been problematical over the years wrt dating, not obviously, but more under the surface, as I don't have a quantifiable career say, compared to a peer working as a line employee or engineer at Boeing. I can say that no woman, not even my exW, has had sufficient interest in even spending a day in my work life, seeing what I do, what I design, what I invent, what I build. It's a radar I massage well, now, and see as an asset, though in decades past saw it as a liability. Style also is a factor, IMO. People who trumpet their accomplishments from the rooftops are more likely to be noticed than those who toil away in relative anonymity. I have to laugh just now, remembering the days I used to spend at my exW's salon, watching work flow and thinking up little gadgets which could improve her efficiency and bottom line. Doing is its own reward, even if she never saw what I did. Next. Sure, I'd date someone who's unemployed. To disqualify them on that parameter would be the epitome of hypocrisy.
Author Nicomis Posted July 9, 2012 Author Posted July 9, 2012 Anyone have thoughts on how young a relationship should be to end it based on the other persons employment status without looking like a heartless ass? Example: I date someone for 2 months, and they have been without a job for a month. Is it still OK to end it based on that, or would that make me a total prick? I imagine after 8 weeks you have some sort of relationship, and that would be jacked up, but I'm curious what others think.
ThatDudeXO Posted July 9, 2012 Posted July 9, 2012 Anyone have thoughts on how young a relationship should be to end it based on the other persons employment status without looking like a heartless ass? Example: I date someone for 2 months, and they have been without a job for a month. Is it still OK to end it based on that, or would that make me a total prick? I imagine after 8 weeks you have some sort of relationship, and that would be jacked up, but I'm curious what others think. Depends on 2 things. Do you like the person enough to keep going? Are they genuinely trying to get a job or move forward in life?
Imajerk17 Posted July 9, 2012 Posted July 9, 2012 I had a girlfriend stick by me for over a year (a decade or so ago) while I was un/underemployed. I won't elaborate about that too much though, because at the time I was the type of jerky boyfriend that everyone on here complains about.
Imajerk17 Posted July 9, 2012 Posted July 9, 2012 Seriously though, I'm not sure I would do it again now though--date while unemployed (and not having a job lined up) NOR date someone who is unemployed (and who doesn't have a financial cushion). I need to feel I have my own life in order to be a good partner. I do not want to end up "taking care" of someone financially, not before we are married at least.
brahmabull117 Posted July 10, 2012 Posted July 10, 2012 It's not an issue for me as long as she's actively looking for work
2sure Posted July 10, 2012 Posted July 10, 2012 Employment or the lack of it...would not in itself be a deal breaker, but a consideration.
mn311601 Posted July 10, 2012 Posted July 10, 2012 Of course unemployed people shouldn't date, they are lepers. that would bring a little happiness into their lives, we wouldn't want that would we?
aRealMan Posted July 10, 2012 Posted July 10, 2012 I don't mean to be rude, but if you can't date without having enough money to babysit your partner, it really says something about our counter parts. The message is: will have sex for food and or direct cash!
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