Adamgem Posted July 8, 2012 Posted July 8, 2012 I am just trying to get used to the idea of it being over. I can't eat. My stomach is in bits... I can hardly breathe. I can't believe I fell for his silly lies. I feel like such a fool. I know his partner believes his lies. Part of me wants to tell her and the other part thinks 'just leave her in her fantasy world'. It is not my place to say anything. I wonder how long I will feel like this. I am finding it very difficult to focus on anything..... All advise welcome....
awkward Posted July 8, 2012 Posted July 8, 2012 I'm sorry that you are hurting. I wish I could tell you how long it will last. I don't know the answer to that. What I do know is that every day that you focus on him, waiting for him to contact you, waiting for him to make a different choice, waiting, waiting, waiting ... it will take you that much longer. Rip the band aid off and walk through the pain. You will get to the either side. 1
Author Adamgem Posted July 8, 2012 Author Posted July 8, 2012 Thank you so much for your kind words. I know I have a very tough few months in front of me. In the last year I have not had much contact with my friends and am now living in a different country. I am completely isolated and alone. It is going to be so difficult to resist his advances. He is away with his children right now. He doesn't want it to end. Why would he? He has the best of both worlds... whilst both his partner and I suffer....aaagh. I just want to get away and stop all contact completely but that is impossible at the moment. I feel a bit worried if I am honest. I do not know how he is going to be when he gets back. He is used to getting his way in life. Even one of his older daughters (from another partner)... told me 'yes, he is my Dad but I think you are doing the right thing.. he will hurt you in the end'.
awkward Posted July 9, 2012 Posted July 9, 2012 "He will hurt you in the end." NO he had been hurting you all along. How are you doing?
Semolina Pilchard Posted July 9, 2012 Posted July 9, 2012 When will the pain wear off? There really is no answer to that. It might never. It might become a part of you, that pops up every now and then on the surface of your soul even if you seem to have forgotten about it. The first thing you should do is, admit to yourself you are in so much pain, and accept it. Don't deny it, and don't supress it. Take your time to grieve, and to let our your anger. You might not feel better about him, but you will feel better about yourself. Try to be strong and resists. I know it is hard, but take one step at a time. Try to see each day as a new challenge, and reward yourself for even the tiniest bit of progress. I feel for you.
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