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There are two competitions coming up and he's gonna be there(this guy I'm still in the process of getting over because he has a gf). It's fine if I don't go 4 the first competition because I'm not competing. But I think I'm most likely gonna be competing in the next one. If I go that is. This moving on process is really disrupting my life right now and preventing me from doing things I need to be doing. Not sure what to do. If I know what's best 4 me, maybe I shouldn't go to either. What do you guys think?

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I'm thinking I shouldn't go because it might ruin all the work I have been doing keeping my distance from him for the past 5 weeks(I think). But at the same time I'm also thinking this avoiding him thing is making me very cautious and careful of where I go.

 

Somehow, it's actually keeping him on my mind instead of keeping him out. I just don't want to care anymore where he goes or where he doesn't go. I don't understand what I did to deserve this. I would do anything 4 my peace of mind right now. That's all I ask 4 - peace of mind.

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