Zammo25 Posted July 5, 2012 Posted July 5, 2012 How did feel when you knew your ex was having sex with someone else ? It is hard enough splitting up but this is a whole different ball game but ultimately the end game. Wow it is painful. But it helps closure if it is needed. Good luck friends.
DMS Posted July 5, 2012 Posted July 5, 2012 Honestly it hurt a bit but not too much. When the ex left me one of the things she made a point of saying was that the sex was no good ( fair enough, she was my first and had a hard time telling me how i could improve.) When she went to visit her new BF in Pennsylvania I knew they would have sex so i guess in that regard i had already prepared myself for it.
Chi townD Posted July 5, 2012 Posted July 5, 2012 How did I KNOW my Ex was having sex? She got pregnant out of wedlock. How did I feel about it? "WHEW!!!! Better him than me!!"
headsashed Posted July 5, 2012 Posted July 5, 2012 My ex had sex with someone else while she was in a relationship with me,that hurt like nothing else,she probs slept with a dozen men since we split too but im beyond caring,its her life so let her lead it. She isnt my problem anymore. 1
Author Zammo25 Posted July 5, 2012 Author Posted July 5, 2012 I have had confirmation today my ex is with someone else. So having sex. She has moved on so fast, 3 months. Feel like sh*t and worthless. The new guy is a rugby type hunk so obviously a better man than me.
headsashed Posted July 5, 2012 Posted July 5, 2012 I have had confirmation today my ex is with someone else. So having sex. She has moved on so fast, 3 months. Feel like sh*t and worthless. The new guy is a rugby type hunk so obviously a better man than me. Dont pull urself down pal,its not worth it,believe me. I havent even been broken up with my ex for 3 months and ive no idea if she has someone new or not,chances are she has been sleeping about though,its her new life style,my friends have seen her out on the town kissin other guys etc. But we are better than this,its probs a rebound or something so leave her to it,she will crumble in the end,and hey,you cant be that bad,she fell for you before didnt she? well,so will other girls
Author Zammo25 Posted July 5, 2012 Author Posted July 5, 2012 Thanks for the kind words mate. The thing is I have a chance with a new lady who is hot, intelligent and interesting but I can't stop thinking about the ex all the bloody time. We were together for a year and to be honest I blew it , more to the truth I blame myself for not stepping up to the plate and now she has met a new guy whose photo I have seen as it is on her FB and he is a cool dude, beefcake and makes me feel inadequate. She sent a message to a mututal friend to let me know she is with someone else and to never contact her again. That STINGS
headsashed Posted July 5, 2012 Posted July 5, 2012 I feel for you mate,i really do,you should just go with this new girl and have fun,its probably best not to go any further with this girl though,as in sex or a relationship as you still have feelings for your ex,it wouldnt be fair on the new girl,but theres nothing wrong with just going out and enjoying yourself. Ive decided to stay single while i fully get over my ex and just go out and enjoy myself with my friends,even if something does happen with the new girl then just take it slow and be honest with her about everything. Some people believe rebounding is a cure to getting over an ex,but i dont believe in it,ive never rebounded and never would,ive got the chance to this coming weekend but ive cancelled,i still have too many feelings for my cheating ex and its not fair on the new girl.
Author Zammo25 Posted July 5, 2012 Author Posted July 5, 2012 I don't want to not take the chance with this new woman but am not over the ex and the confirmation of her seeing some new hunk and me never contacting me again through a friend was a knife in the heart. I feel like complete sh*t and totally worthless.
headsashed Posted July 5, 2012 Posted July 5, 2012 I don't want to not take the chance with this new woman but am not over the ex and the confirmation of her seeing some new hunk and me never contacting me again through a friend was a knife in the heart. I feel like complete sh*t and totally worthless. I know it hurts like hell pal but you just got to let it be,facebook is our own worst enemy,ive stopped using mine for 2 reasons,1 because her friends are reporting to her my every move and 2,her friend put some pictures up and my ex was covered in love bites,it did hurt a little but its things like that i really dont need to see. Just dissappear from her life now,its all you can do,go enjoy yourself with the new girl and in time your feelings for you ex will fade. I see my ex regular too,we live on the same street but i just have to be strong,just like you need to be now,keep busy and most of all just go out and have fun.
Author Zammo25 Posted July 5, 2012 Author Posted July 5, 2012 Thanks mate. I am processing this new information now and cannot think clearly. The thought of her with the new hunk in bed makes me physically sick. It was the cold way of telling a friend " tell him I have met someone else and not to ever contact me again " that is the real knife in the heart. I am finding it very difficult to cope tonight.
Author Zammo25 Posted July 5, 2012 Author Posted July 5, 2012 She is one of my FB " friends ". Should I delete her tonight ?
headsashed Posted July 5, 2012 Posted July 5, 2012 Thanks mate. I am processing this new information now and cannot think clearly. The thought of her with the new hunk in bed makes me physically sick. It was the cold way of telling a friend " tell him I have met someone else and not to ever contact me again " that is the real knife in the heart. I am finding it very difficult to cope tonight. She sounds immature by not being able to tell you herself. Try not to think about her with her new man,i know its hard but try occupy your mind somehow. Try having your gf tell you she loves you and the same night sleep with some random stranger,that hurt like hell,but the thoughts do fade i promise. If anything,its closure for you,just like it was for me,now time is our healer and yes,delete her from your facebook.
Author Zammo25 Posted July 5, 2012 Author Posted July 5, 2012 Thanks. I just need to talk it through and you are helping. If there is anything I can do for you let me know. I am just knocked back about, her being woth someone else so soon and , her basicallt telling me to f*ck of out of her life after she meant so much to me. That HURTS.
Chi townD Posted July 5, 2012 Posted July 5, 2012 She is one of my FB " friends ". Should I delete her tonight ? YES!!!! And Headshed is right. You're beating yourself up over nothing and she's probably hanging with a guy that probably thinks nothing of her. I would tell that girl (the hot one) that you are interested on taking her out. Look, there's nothing that says you have to start a relationship and any other pressure like that. You just need a night out and what better way to do in the company of a pretty girl. Just be honest with her and upfront. That you've gotten out of a relationship and you're not looking for one right now. But, you are interested in having a fun night out with her. Just go have fun!
Author Zammo25 Posted July 5, 2012 Author Posted July 5, 2012 YES!!!! And Headshed is right. You're beating yourself up over nothing and she's probably hanging with a guy that probably thinks nothing of her. I would tell that girl (the hot one) that you are interested on taking her out. Look, there's nothing that says you have to start a relationship and any other pressure like that. You just need a night out and what better way to do in the company of a pretty girl. Just be honest with her and upfront. That you've gotten out of a relationship and you're not looking for one right now. But, you are interested in having a fun night out with her. Just go have fun! Thanks friends you are helping me tonight. In a real mess but f*ck her she did not deserve me.
Author Zammo25 Posted July 5, 2012 Author Posted July 5, 2012 After that ****ty e mail through a friend the only pathetic power I have is to delete her from her fb friends. She only has 3 so it would be noticed and will stop me wanting to snoop around. She is with the new hunk now and I am history and that was made clear through a friend. Very harsh I think but it is what it is.
headsashed Posted July 5, 2012 Posted July 5, 2012 After that ****ty e mail through a friend the only pathetic power I have is to delete her from her fb friends. She only has 3 so it would be noticed and will stop me wanting to snoop around. She is with the new hunk now and I am history and that was made clear through a friend. Very harsh I think but it is what it is. You only have 1 option,that is to move on with your life. Ill try tell you what im doing to cope and its helping me so much. 1: keep busy 2: go with friends and have fun 3: vent about your feelings to friends/family or on here if u need to. 4: dont hold any feelings in,let them out,letting them build up will only make it worse,just dont be ashamed to cry,i certainly aint. 5: do things you enjoy,like hobbies etc,i chose to play football/soccer again. 6: improve yourself,like get a new hair cut,new job,new clothes,think u get the gist. 7: block everything you can about your ex,like emails,phone numbers,delete pictures etc. 8: implement NC, DO NOT contact her at all,if she contacts you then ignore it as it will most likely be crappy bread crumbs. 9: keep fit and eat healthy,believe me it helps 10: Try not to be alone as this will only make u think about your ex. Hope this helps pal.
Author Zammo25 Posted July 5, 2012 Author Posted July 5, 2012 You only have 1 option,that is to move on with your life. Ill try tell you what im doing to cope and its helping me so much. 1: keep busy 2: go with friends and have fun 3: vent about your feelings to friends/family or on here if u need to. 4: dont hold any feelings in,let them out,letting them build up will only make it worse,just dont be ashamed to cry,i certainly aint. 5: do things you enjoy,like hobbies etc,i chose to play football/soccer again. 6: improve yourself,like get a new hair cut,new job,new clothes,think u get the gist. 7: block everything you can about your ex,like emails,phone numbers,delete pictures etc. 8: implement NC, DO NOT contact her at all,if she contacts you then ignore it as it will most likely be crappy bread crumbs. 9: keep fit and eat healthy,believe me it helps 10: Try not to be alone as this will only make u think about your ex. Hope this helps pal. Thanks you have been a great help during this difficult night. To hear your ex is with someone else, having sex with someone else and telling someone to never contact her again. WOW that is a big hit to take in any one night.
2456249 Posted July 5, 2012 Posted July 5, 2012 I just found out my verbally abusive boyfriend of 6 years who I broke up with only 3 weeks ago has been having sex with about 10 women already. Yeah... I'm realizing now he definitely is a sex addict and has cheated on me repeatedly. I think the worst is that he had sex with his roommate the other day who I also lived with. He would always say awful things about her, but turns out he was attracted to her the whole time...disgusts me.
KatZee Posted July 5, 2012 Posted July 5, 2012 (edited) "It's his problem now" But from my end, "It's her problem now." I have no idea if he's having sex, I'm pretty sure he's out sticking himself in whoever he feels like it since he's only had two partners in his entire life, and both were long term relationships. Probably like a kid in a candy shop right now, and honestly if he is, I couldn't care less. He was often very selfish in bed, he never did oral, in almost three years I can count the number of times on one hand. (what MAN can't go down on a woman? Come on.) And trying to find my C-spot was like being with a person with short term memory. He'd be there and then totally forget where to go subsequent times after. I'm really not that envious or upset about any other female he screws from here on out. Edited July 5, 2012 by KatZee
Gulf-Delta Posted July 5, 2012 Posted July 5, 2012 But from my end, "It's her problem now." I have no idea if he's having sex, I'm pretty sure he's out sticking himself in whoever he feels like it since he's only had two partners in his entire life, and both were long term relationships. Probably like a kid in a candy shop right now, and honestly if he is, I couldn't care less. He was often very selfish in bed, he never did oral, in almost three years I can count the number of times on one hand. (what MAN can't go down on a woman? Come on.) And trying to find my C-spot was like being with a person with short term memory. He'd be there and then totally forget where to go subsequent times after. I'm really not that envious or upset about any other female he screws from here on out. Well, my ex was never bad in bed. The thing is, my ex and someone else have had sex. They're a couple now. He has to deal with the crappy person she has become. My ex was the most amazing person I've ever met. She has since transformed into a child....that's new guy's problem to deal with now. I know their sexual experiences will never live up and I now he'll never live up to me as a lover. There's sex, the physical act, and then there's the emotional, mental side too...making love, you know. That's what my ex and I had. He can't live up to that AND he has to deal with her crap. Whateve.r
KatZee Posted July 5, 2012 Posted July 5, 2012 It wasn't "bad" per sey, it was just selfish a lot of the time. He also had sex with someone else when we were together, and I think finding out your partner has cheated is much worse than hearing about them having sex once the relationship is over. Keep your chin up. If this is who she is now, then whatever. The person you knew is gone. As is the person I once knew. I don't miss that person for one second, and you shouldn't either. Whether or not he matches up to you in bed is a moot point. I'm sure at some point she WILL sleep with someone who blows her socks off, that's just a fact. Well, my ex was never bad in bed. The thing is, my ex and someone else have had sex. They're a couple now. He has to deal with the crappy person she has become. My ex was the most amazing person I've ever met. She has since transformed into a child....that's new guy's problem to deal with now. I know their sexual experiences will neve live up and I now he'll never live up to me as a lover. Whateve.r
Gulf-Delta Posted July 5, 2012 Posted July 5, 2012 I'm sure at some point she WILL sleep with someone who blows her socks off, that's just a fact. Yeah, it was me
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