SiMoNe Posted July 6, 2004 Posted July 6, 2004 i am 25 and i have had plenty of sex but the problem is i dont enjoy it, it doesnt please me at all. Now i have a boyfriend who i have been with for a year and its getting really serious, we are even talking about marriage. I feel really bad that every time we have sex i have to pretend that i like it, the only aspect of the sex i like is that 1. i am pleasing him and 2.i get to be close to him. To be honest sex just seem like a chore to me, something thats is undesirable to do. I can't get in the mood and during sex i just wish it would be over. My boyfeiend is the typical male and he love his sex and wants it all the time but i am even at the stage where i stop him from touching and we dont have sex for months on end. I feel bad about not giving it to him and i force myself to do it but i wish it was as pleasurable for me as it is for him. please help me there has to be something wrong.
LatsyrcSC Posted July 6, 2004 Posted July 6, 2004 Well, I've never had this problem before, but I've heard of women who did have this problem. Maybe there's medication available to help you get "in the mood". Try talking to your doctor about it.
heliumballooon Posted July 9, 2004 Posted July 9, 2004 If there was a little pill that women could take to revive a persons sexual pleasure, it would cost $100 a pill because everyone would want one. I mean, there could be. I'm not a professional, but as far as I've heard (and I've done research) this is a common problem. I too, am a woman, with a partner (a boy) and I really don't enjoy sex. Sometimes it feels kinda good for the first 2 minutes, but after that I am stuck thinking how I wish he would just finish so I can stop already. From the research I've done I have found a couple possible explanations for this phenomenon. First of all, yes, a common side effects of a lot of perscrption meds is a decrease in sexual desire. Another reason for this could be simply a difference in each person's "normal" sex schedule or libido. Meaning, he thinks is normal to "do it" from 7-10 times a week, while you would rather "do it" 2-3. However, if you have either no sexual desire for him or had desire at one point and lost it, this explanation would probably not suffice. A third explanation is that the fire died. At one point you lusted after him and now, after time together, he no longer sparks your intrest. This is sometimes a hard thing to admit (now you have to do something about it). Trust me, most times he will continue to become less and less appealing the longer you refuse to do something about it. I know, I am in this exact situation. Few people can force themselves into being attracted to a person. Also, few people simply "don't enjoy sex." They just don't enjoy the sex they are having.
moimeme Posted July 9, 2004 Posted July 9, 2004 There are medical treatments. In fact, a new drug was just approved in the US, I believe. Go see the doc. If you have never enjoyed sex, it's not about the guy or losing interest in him. It's about you and you should go see about it.
kellydontwanttasleep Posted July 9, 2004 Posted July 9, 2004 you need to do two things, see your doctor and go to therapy
chicasha Posted July 9, 2004 Posted July 9, 2004 i completely agree....you should talk to your doctor about it. It might *not* be that you love your guy any less...it could be a medical thing. I know sometimes diet/other medications/a lot of other factors affect hormone levels. I'm not doctor, but i'm surrounded by a bunch of them, and I do work for a pharmaceutical company making all kindsa medications ;-) So...i've seen a lot of literature out there in medical journals, gone to conferences, etc, to know that this is a real issue that might be able to be treated by a doctor........so, definitely talk to yours!
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