virg0m0tion Posted July 4, 2012 Posted July 4, 2012 My boyfriend used to have feelings for his bestfriend but she didn't feel the same way about him and only saw him as a friend. So, basically if she had liked him back they probably would've started dating. What bothers me is that he is still in contact with her and will basically be a part of his life forever. He's known her since he was very little so I guess it's obviously hard for him to let go. He assures me that he was "confused" and that he didn't really love her he just THOUGHT he loved her but I can't help but feel weird about the fact they he wants me to meet her. He told me when she comes back into town (she lives out of state) that I should meet her and that I would really like her. But even that drove me nuts because he thinks she's so great and he even admitted that he has more things in common with her than with me. I understand that if I make him choose between me or her he will choose me but he will resent me forever. So I'm stuck in a bad position either way. I just want to feel better but I don't think this is something that should end the relationship either. Can someone please help me figure out what would be the most fair and balanced option for the both of us? ps I'm sorry if I posted this in the wrong area/section. This is my first official post. 1
Christine52 Posted July 4, 2012 Posted July 4, 2012 That's going to happen. You're going to meet guys who have female friends who they probably wanted to boink at one point or another, and maybe even marry. Here is how I would look at it: If he is treating you with privilege over her, and you FEEL that he treats you like you're special, then I wouldn't dwell on it. If you start to see that he is putting a premium on her feelings, and he'd rather spend more money on her birthday gift, or he'd rather spend his birthday with her, not you, then you have an issue and need to move on. I would be a little upset if he told me he had more in common with her - to me this is inconsiderate on his end, though he is being honest, it's not something you should be sharing with your girlfriend unless you are able to work super hard to make her feel special.
TripLine Posted July 4, 2012 Posted July 4, 2012 He is introducing you to show you nothing is going on. You should feel good about that.
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