drivingmyselfcrazy Posted July 3, 2012 Posted July 3, 2012 Ok.... So, I am one of those girls that has a terrible case of Anxiety, no matter how great something is going for me.. I feel apart of me is wasting away and dreading the thought of something god awful (especially within a relationship) will happen/is happening/has happened. I have seen this thrown around on these forums a lot .. my issue is with this so called " ohhh so busy with work " deal. Now. My partner is in the states and I am in Australia so of course our hours are completely out of sync, yet we still make it work, we chat every day. He is god awful at the internet but he makes it work so he can speak to me. Hi job involves crazy hours, some times morning to late evening or even crazier than that. Now.. according to him he is trying to make enough to move to a different suburb (in the same state he is in) so he has been working extra hours like crazy but he still gets on to talk to me even though its just for a couple of hours because he is exhausted and what not. But ladies.... how can you tell if this is legit or not? I can't help but think the worst even though it appears he is honest with me. I know that I shouldn’t be thinking each guy I ever get involved with is a total jerk (all of my previous ones have been) so I kind of am prepared to look like a fool and be right.. Should I be looking into something? Some signs? I just always freak out and try to pin point every small detail. Is anyone else like this? or am I a nutbag? :sick:
Celtica Posted July 3, 2012 Posted July 3, 2012 I understand what you're saying. You want a guy who is constantly there, care free, making plans for the relationship, etc. But I'm wondering if what you're experiencing is just a difference in cultures. Correct me if I'm wrong, but stereotypically speaking, the States is very different from Australia (I lived in Oz for one year) - I found Oz to be more of an egalitarian society, whereas us Yanks thrive on entrepreneurship and working one's way up the social ladder. It's funny, I dated a guy in Oz who was worried I was way too career oriented to be investing in a relationship with him, which wasn't the case - it's just the way I work, a part of my cultural upbringing. And really, it was a horrible feeling as it felt like he was trying to make me choose between him and my career path, which I think I can have both. It's amazing in itself that your guy is contacting you every day. That is pure dedication in my book. Now, if you are doing all the initiating, then you might want him to take the lead if you are worried and see where things go. To me, I think you are just dealing with the emotions of a LDR, which is where all the anxiety is coming from. It's easy to fantasize about where things could go presently, but without tangibly witnessing each others day to day lives, our imaginations can run wild, for good or for worse. Don't worry, you'll be right 1
Author drivingmyselfcrazy Posted July 3, 2012 Author Posted July 3, 2012 Thank you! I think that is all I needed to hear. I have those days when I just need to hear that in order to get it through my thick skull. He makes the effort so he is worth the wait. I just want him all the time but I can't have my way and I know he wishes the same. *footstompcry* haha God damn, yanks always with the working You cheered me up!!!!
Celtica Posted July 3, 2012 Posted July 3, 2012 You're welcome! Glad I could help clear the air. I really do think Yanks and Aussies/Kiwis compliment each other. The guy who I mentioned in my other thread on Body change is a Kiwi, and by golly was he a romantic daydreamer (never met 'em here!). But the thing is, you guys CAN do that because you literally live in Paradise. And we definitely don't (at least the majority). Hence, we work hard to get to that Paradise...
ladyabstrused Posted July 3, 2012 Posted July 3, 2012 Ok.... So, I am one of those girls that has a terrible case of Anxiety, no matter how great something is going for me.. I feel apart of me is wasting away and dreading the thought of something god awful (especially within a relationship) will happen/is happening/has happened. I have seen this thrown around on these forums a lot .. my issue is with this so called " ohhh so busy with work " deal. Now. My partner is in the states and I am in Australia so of course our hours are completely out of sync, yet we still make it work, we chat every day. He is god awful at the internet but he makes it work so he can speak to me. Hi job involves crazy hours, some times morning to late evening or even crazier than that. Now.. according to him he is trying to make enough to move to a different suburb (in the same state he is in) so he has been working extra hours like crazy but he still gets on to talk to me even though its just for a couple of hours because he is exhausted and what not. But ladies.... how can you tell if this is legit or not? I can't help but think the worst even though it appears he is honest with me. I know that I shouldn’t be thinking each guy I ever get involved with is a total jerk (all of my previous ones have been) so I kind of am prepared to look like a fool and be right.. Should I be looking into something? Some signs? I just always freak out and try to pin point every small detail. Is anyone else like this? or am I a nutbag? :sick: If all this while there hasn't been any major issue between the both of you and you can safely say you trust him, then he must be saying the truth. And the fact that he still makes contact with you everyday and puts in the effort for communication...that's pretty nice. You should give him your support while he's busy trying to do something worthwhile and while he's also tending to you and the relationship. Good luck to the both of you.
Recommended Posts