Pierre Posted July 3, 2012 Posted July 3, 2012 I am finding that if I am dating a guy and he fails to keep in regular touch (even via text) at least once every couple of days, my interest level will drop. Even if we have dates set up, I feel like canceling and completely disconnected if no communication has occurred in between. After first date, if the guy doesn't contact me the next day, my interest level has already plummeted. I am fascinated by pick-up artists and their advice which is basically to do exactly the opposite of what works with me (and most women I know). I laugh at "don't contact for 3 days", "do neg" (if someone tells me anything negative about myself early on, I am done). The real way to get "under a girl's skin" is to clearly state your intentions and consistent, clear and open communication. Please read the above. This is how women think, 1
Sid6.7 Posted July 3, 2012 Posted July 3, 2012 I think you are over thinking it.. it's just dating.. I'm almost 50 and never waited past day 2 to contact a date and most of my first contacts were the next day and I never once came across desperate.. I also was never at a loss for dates, 2nd dates, women in my life.. or marriages so I guess my whole life was the rare occurrence.. I do think that when a man comes across desperate it is because the liking is only one way, if both people like one another after the first date the call can happen right after the date and they just go about business as usual and don't judge one another. So.. if a guy calls on the first day and he comes cross as desperate then he likes her much more than she likes him.. either way.. even on day 2 or 3 it would be a fail. So.. it really is about knowing to call or not.. period, not when to call. I am going to round up here, I hope you don't mind. You are currently married, if I recall correctly. I mean no disrespect in regards to my comment to you. So, take it as you may. In 1962 Mr. Critic was born, so let's be generous and add 17 years for dating age which would be 1979. At the time of this year I may agree with your advice completely. However, as you know we no longer live in that era. You are married and no longer dating. You have not seen the dating palladium in quite some time since the consummation of your current marriage. How long has that been by the way? So yes, I would call this a rare occurrence.
Sid6.7 Posted July 3, 2012 Posted July 3, 2012 Please read the above. This is how women think, This is how she thinks. It's not so simple as one and done.
Art_Critic Posted July 3, 2012 Posted July 3, 2012 I am going to round up here, I hope you don't mind. You are currently married, if I recall correctly. I mean no disrespect in regards to my comment to you. So, take it as you may. In 1962 Mr. Critic was born, so let's be generous and add 17 years for dating age which would be 1979. At the time of this year I may agree with your advice completely. However, as you know we no longer live in that era. You are married and no longer dating. You have not seen the dating palladium in quite some time since the consummation of your current marriage. How long has that been by the way? So yes, I would call this a rare occurrence. That's one of the most asinine replies I have ever read.. no disrespect... No value at all...and it goes to show what you know
Eternal Sunshine Posted July 3, 2012 Posted July 3, 2012 All guys that were truly interested in me called the next day, with majority asking me out on the second date before the first date ended. All the day 2 or more callers were interested in something casual and had other girls going. These days if he hasn't called by day 2, he is a goner. I don't even have to try hard because I have already forgotten about him by then.
ptp Posted July 3, 2012 Posted July 3, 2012 Two days is like industry standard, but three days is kind of money.
Sid6.7 Posted July 3, 2012 Posted July 3, 2012 That's one of the most asinine replies I have ever read.. no disrespect... No value at all...and it goes to show what you know Damn. And here I was hoping for a detailed and seasoned retort in our current dating atmosphere from a veteran such as yourself. A married man with current dating expertise by the way. Right? Didn't show me much at all.
Art_Critic Posted July 3, 2012 Posted July 3, 2012 Hey Sid.. I met my wife on Match... where did you meet y.... never mind...
Eternal Sunshine Posted July 3, 2012 Posted July 3, 2012 FYI I never saw it as desperate, not even when I wasn't interested in a guy. These behaviors I would call desperate: Calling 5 times a day to chat when you are being short and telling him "I have to go" number of times. Contacting you repeatedly (or even once) after you directly and clearly reject him - and trying to change your mind. Sending you multiple e-mails/text in a row before you have responded to the first one.
Art_Critic Posted July 3, 2012 Posted July 3, 2012 Damn. And here I was hoping for a detailed and seasoned retort in our current dating atmosphere from a veteran such as yourself. A married man with current dating expertise by the way. Right? Didn't show me much at all. another asinine reply.. damn sid.. you should be able to do better than that.. tells us how dating works again...
WeAllMightBeNuts Posted July 3, 2012 Posted July 3, 2012 Having a preset number of days is either: a.Your own personal requirement that will screen possibly great people or b.Playing games. Same goes for someone analyzing the amount of time before a guy calls.
Sid6.7 Posted July 3, 2012 Posted July 3, 2012 Hey Sid.. I met my wife on Match... where did you meet y.... never mind... So you dispense information to people that are looking to date, which in reality you, yourself, are not dating. Am I the only one here where that logic is lost on me? It makes no sense. Then instead of addressing my points you would rather bring out the the teenager in yourself and attack me with aspersions and ridicule. Maybe that is why you post here, to re-live your teenage and youthful years here on this forum from a life of dating you wished you could do over from years past. Oh, how lovely that would be wouldn't it? I am doing it right now. I suppose we cannot find any common ground here Mr. Critic.
Art_Critic Posted July 3, 2012 Posted July 3, 2012 I suppose we cannot find any common ground here Mr. Critic. I haven't attacked you.. Pointing out that your insulting replies are asinine isn't an attack ... If you choose to continue to attack me personally rather than dispute my points then it shows something about you rather than me I'm not going to get into trying to help you any further since you have all the answers to dating success .. I take it you are sleeping alone tonight... Good day Sid, and this will be my last reply to you
Sid6.7 Posted July 3, 2012 Posted July 3, 2012 I haven't attacked you.. Pointing out that your insulting replies are asinine isn't an attack ... If you choose to continue to attack me personally rather than dispute my points then it shows something about you rather than me I'm not going to get into trying to help you any further since you have all the answers to dating success .. I take it you are sleeping alone tonight... Good day Sid, and this will be my last reply to you I did dispute your points, and countered them, how do you think this transaction took place? I sleep alone exactly when I feel like it and exactly when I don't. I also take the garbage out when I damn well please. Good day to you as well, Sir. Until our paths cross again I hope you sleep soundly and awake refreshed.
oaks Posted July 3, 2012 Posted July 3, 2012 Is there a preset number of days a man must wait before he can call? No, there is not.
Author DollWelch Posted July 5, 2012 Author Posted July 5, 2012 He finally called yesterday (Wednesday)! I think my nerves got the best of me, and I began to doubt him. Sometimes our minds have a funny way to clouding our judgement when we need it the most. In the end, he did call within 3 days and seems to point to the idea that he knows what he's doing -and understands how this game is played. And to the fact that, not all men are the same. Let's hope he doesn't screw this up!
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