96nole Posted July 2, 2012 Posted July 2, 2012 What is the most spiteful thing your WS did to you? Other than the act of cheating and lying to you.
Owl Posted July 2, 2012 Posted July 2, 2012 What is the most spiteful thing your WS did to you? Other than the act of cheating and lying to you. She did nothing out of spite. She was simply entirely self-focused at the time. She was thoughtless, clueless, even a bit heartless after my actions started to lead to the demise of the affair...but she was never spiteful.
Author 96nole Posted July 2, 2012 Author Posted July 2, 2012 Maybe I should ask this on the Separation/Divorce board since it is my now ex wife that is doing spiteful things. Or at least she is trying to.
nofool4u Posted July 2, 2012 Posted July 2, 2012 What is the most spiteful thing your WS did to you? Other than the act of cheating and lying to you. Had me stay home with the kids while I was thinking I was doing a good thing letting her have time to herself. Main reason is she knew with the kids at home in bed, I wouldn't be able to venture out to see where she was if I got the inclination to do so.
GLDheart Posted July 2, 2012 Posted July 2, 2012 Through games with the courts and continuations my ex has hit me where it hurts. It's been over ninety days since I have seen my daughter. The thousands WASTED on lawyers is irrelevant....
reboot Posted July 3, 2012 Posted July 3, 2012 Since you precluded lying and cheating, she did nothing spiteful.
2sure Posted July 3, 2012 Posted July 3, 2012 Expected to go on with his life and career after the divorce, as if I had never existed.
Author 96nole Posted July 3, 2012 Author Posted July 3, 2012 Since you precluded lying and cheating, she did nothing spiteful. Pretty much why I excluded those. I was wondering what is the extra bit of salt they are trying to rub into the wound. I won't bother going into how, but my ex has "conveniently" left a few credit card charges visible to me to make me think she is now pregnant by the dirtbag. Something I was never able to do. If she is and she is able to carry the child to term, I know she will go out of her way to try and rub it in my face.
Furious Posted July 3, 2012 Posted July 3, 2012 Pretty much why I excluded those. I was wondering what is the extra bit of salt they are trying to rub into the wound. I won't bother going into how, but my ex has "conveniently" left a few credit card charges visible to me to make me think she is now pregnant by the dirtbag. Something I was never able to do. If she is and she is able to carry the child to term, I know she will go out of her way to try and rub it in my face. I have a strong feeling if she does have a baby, and judging by the track record of her loser boyfriend she will up a single mom in the near future. Don't let her get to you...she's an idiot.
Author 96nole Posted July 3, 2012 Author Posted July 3, 2012 I have a strong feeling if she does have a baby, and judging by the track record of her loser boyfriend she will up a single mom in the near future. Don't let her get to you...she's an idiot. I know. It got to me a little bit but then when I thought about what she is doing I started laughing. That's when I started the thread. 1
Athena Posted July 3, 2012 Posted July 3, 2012 What is the most spiteful thing your WS did to you? Other than the act of cheating and lying to you. Several times he bought me sexy lingerie from The Netherlands on his stop- over there, as well as for his lover (the EXACT same lingerie, in two different sizes... you have to wonder what the people at the store thought he was up to). Had unprotected sex with me after doing the same with his OW. Called me up after sexing his OW, right after they had sex, from their hotel bed. Told me how lonely and unsociable he was so I felt bad for him, all the while having a great time with his lover, and it was ME who was alone and sad! The cherry on the top -- he took one of his short-term affair partners to the exact SAME five star hotel in Luxembourg where he and I had gone to celebrate our tenth wedding anniversary the year before! Ugh
GLDheart Posted July 3, 2012 Posted July 3, 2012 ....he took one of his short-term affair partners to the exact SAME five star hotel in Luxembourg where he and I had gone to celebrate our tenth wedding anniversary the year before! Ugh Well, all his useful blood supply was diverted elsewhere... leaving him unable to have an original thought. You should feel bad for him in fact... The poor thing... Anyway, It's all your fault he needed to cheat in the first place... Don't you know? /end sarcasm 2
freestyle Posted July 3, 2012 Posted July 3, 2012 He complained to the OW he had an EA with, about me not being supportive of a hobby he was really into. She actually had the gall to lecture me about being "unsupportive" the very first time she met me..(she was one of his old 'friends') and went on to suggest that "maybe there was someone *better for me*"--:mad: The TRUTH is/was---I've been actively involved in that same hobby for years, and even do it professionally. (he neglected to mention that to her) The other TRUTH is/was---I'd been begging him to participate in that hobby with me, only to have him continually put me off, with one excuse after another. I'm not certain he did it to be spiteful, I suspect it was more of a pathological need to paint me in the role of The Mean Mommy, who he needed to rebel against. Whatever the reason---It hurt & offended me deeply that he would pick that one issue, of all things--to use against me, falsely.
BetrayedH Posted July 3, 2012 Posted July 3, 2012 What is the most spiteful thing your WS did to you? Other than the act of cheating and lying to you. She lied to me.
BetrayedH Posted July 3, 2012 Posted July 3, 2012 Had me stay home with the kids while I was thinking I was doing a good thing letting her have time to herself. Main reason is she knew with the kids at home in bed, I wouldn't be able to venture out to see where she was if I got the inclination to do so. Gotta love gaslighting.
BetrayedH Posted July 3, 2012 Posted July 3, 2012 Through games with the courts and continuations my ex has hit me where it hurts. It's been over ninety days since I have seen my daughter. The thousands WASTED on lawyers is irrelevant.... I have to agree that the child custody thing is particularly offensive. I've already lost my kids 50% of the time...I won't lose them any longer. 1
Author 96nole Posted July 3, 2012 Author Posted July 3, 2012 Through games with the courts and continuations my ex has hit me where it hurts. It's been over ninety days since I have seen my daughter. The thousands WASTED on lawyers is irrelevant.... That should be considered a crime against humanity. 6
beenburned Posted July 3, 2012 Posted July 3, 2012 My H was verbally and emotionally abusive to me and the kids during his cheating years. He also gaslighted me to the point I felt crazy for seeing signs/behaviors that supposeably didn't exist! His whole personality changed into an all round a**hole which I should have divorced.(however at that time I didn't know the reason behind it all) 3
Author 96nole Posted July 3, 2012 Author Posted July 3, 2012 Expected to go on with his life and career after the divorce, as if I had never existed. Since you said he expected to go on, did he go on as if you never existed?
Benedictatu Posted July 4, 2012 Posted July 4, 2012 What is the most spiteful thing your WS did to you? Other than the act of cheating and lying to you. He chose a woman who was so perfect just to show me up and then told me how beautiful she was how clever how charming how slim what a great parent she was and then he left me for her.
g450 Posted July 4, 2012 Posted July 4, 2012 Expected to go on with his life and career after the divorce, as if I had never existed. Yep, THIS. My XW tried to erase the past 20+ years together as if I never existed. The part that really hurt is the whole time I was in the worst pain in my life, she was the most cheerful and happy person she has ever been in years. It was almost as if seeing me suffer made her giddy. She treated our divorce like a 12 year old girl treats a breakup with a schoolboy and she was all excited about her future and her new boyfriend. This coming from a woman in her 50s. It was surreal. 1
frozensprouts Posted July 4, 2012 Posted July 4, 2012 there was a kind of food that I really like ( mussels) and He'd always told me he never wanted to try them, he hated them, etc. during the time he was 'waffling", he told me that he'd gone out for dinner to a restaurant the night before that I'd always wanted to try, and tried them and liked them...( he went with her) of all the hurtful things he said/did during that time, for some unknown reason, that really sticks in my mind 1
Nicomis Posted July 4, 2012 Posted July 4, 2012 Aside from running up a $10,000 credit card bill, $800 cell phone bill calling some guy in South America, and then packing up and moving in with some rich guy 1 week after I got laid off from my job, leaving myself and my then 3 year old daughter relying solely on unemployment and unable to pay the bills, she just keeps breathing. That's the worst part. This woman is a serious alcoholic, who has acute pancreatitis. The doctor said her next drink could be her last, and she is only 30! She keeps drinking, and yet she still breathes. That is the most spiteful thing. 5 years later, and she just got kicked out of rehab. Her boyfriends can be recalled by their cars: Corvette, Escalade, Porsche, Corvette, Lincoln Blackwood, Audi TT, and Mercedes C350. Meanwhile, I went back to school, got a degree, have worked sh#$ty job after sh#$ty job, and struggled to support myself and my daughter, and she hasn't paid a cent to help out. So yeah I think not dying is the most spiteful thing she has done. 4
2sure Posted July 6, 2012 Posted July 6, 2012 Since you said he expected to go on, did he go on as if you never existed? I cried for hours when I read this. The answer is NO, he didn't. I did exactly what I told him I would do if he betrayed me again. I ruined him , pretty much. He has had to put away some aspirations, had to change his lifestyle. in the divorce I took all that I could, and got..even by my own reasoning, more than I should have. I fought and fought and fought. And I won. Yet, you know, here I am. trying to figure out how I became the kind of person who could do that. How I am still a woman so pissed off, so ...I have this general mistrust of the world. I'm trying to be healthy and do good things for other people and myself...but still. I'm angry that in the end, when I did exactly what I told him I would do...that he seemed so genuinely hurt and surprised. None of it needed to be this way. he should have divorced me, he should have let me go with just a broken heart and freaking left me...instead of begging and pleading and making me stand by my ultimatum. 2
2sure Posted July 6, 2012 Posted July 6, 2012 Bent, yeah I know you get it. Years ago, I thought you were pretty bitter and have watched you change and I guess that's where I'm at now. 1
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