tenspoons Posted July 1, 2012 Posted July 1, 2012 It seems like every time I get close to a girl that I like and likes me back, she starts ignoring me after a month or so. despite the fact that she says and acts like she enjoys my company and spirit. They just randomly stop replying to my messages, and put less important or less demanding things before me.They will never tell me why. This is starting to happen with my current romance, and this is the 3rd time in a row. WTf?!
sid3 Posted July 1, 2012 Posted July 1, 2012 It seems like every time I get close to a girl that I like and likes me back, she starts ignoring me after a month or so. despite the fact that she says and acts like she enjoys my company and spirit. They just randomly stop replying to my messages, and put less important or less demanding things before me.They will never tell me why. This is starting to happen with my current romance, and this is the 3rd time in a row. WTf?! You must be giving off some sort of needy/ clingy vibe if it happens so consistently.
Shaun-Dro Posted July 1, 2012 Posted July 1, 2012 It seems like every time I get close to a girl that I like and likes me back, she starts ignoring me after a month or so. despite the fact that she says and acts like she enjoys my company and spirit. They just randomly stop replying to my messages, and put less important or less demanding things before me.They will never tell me why. This is starting to happen with my current romance, and this is the 3rd time in a row. WTf?! The answer here is easy. Women, or girls, however you may want to view them, can't help but play head games with their counterparts: men!!! This is their nature and it will never cease. Get yourself an escort and avoid it. 1
Author tenspoons Posted July 1, 2012 Author Posted July 1, 2012 (edited) You must be giving off some sort of needy/ clingy vibe if it happens so consistently. Yeah i figured that after the last 2, but this time I gave her space. Sometimes a week, sometimes a few days. When I do seek her attention though, it's only for 20 minutes to 1 hour unless it's a date. also, she will never start the conversation with me first anymore. Like it's my job now. Edited July 1, 2012 by tenspoons
SJC2008 Posted July 1, 2012 Posted July 1, 2012 How old are you? Are you meeting these women online or IRL? How do you space your dates/contact? It's a hard thing to pinpoint because your pace may be too fast for some and too slow for others.
sid3 Posted July 1, 2012 Posted July 1, 2012 Yeah i figured that after the last 2, but this time I gave her space. Sometimes a week, sometimes a few days. When I do seek her attention though, it's only for 20 minutes to 1 hour unless it's a date. also, she will never start the conversation with me first anymore. Like it's my job now. Yep, its likely an issue of coming across as too interested. Even with the latest girl. Its an unfortunate part of dating but you have to realise until you meet the right one where it no longer matters, its the way it is. The good news, there's single women everywhere.
Shaun-Dro Posted July 1, 2012 Posted July 1, 2012 Yep, its likely an issue of coming across as too interested. Even with the latest girl. Its an unfortunate part of dating but you have to realise until you meet the right one where it no longer matters, its the way it is. The good news, there's single women everywhere. There is no right one these days. I already gave the OP advice but clearly he wants to ignore it. Continue dealing with the silliness then.
sid3 Posted July 1, 2012 Posted July 1, 2012 There is no right one these days. I already gave the OP advice but clearly he wants to ignore it. Continue dealing with the silliness then. Ok, there is no right "one" there's at least 10s of thousands if not hundreds. And yeah, your advice to get an escort was quite insightful.
SJC2008 Posted July 1, 2012 Posted July 1, 2012 The contact with the last one seemed hot/cold IMO. Try to mix it up with not too long of a gal. I keep light contact with mixing it up and not being predictable.
sid3 Posted July 1, 2012 Posted July 1, 2012 they want mysogynists Do you know any other words? Not including ****face? 1
manup Posted July 1, 2012 Posted July 1, 2012 Yeah i figured that after the last 2, but this time I gave her space. Sometimes a week, sometimes a few days. When I do seek her attention though, it's only for 20 minutes to 1 hour unless it's a date. also, she will never start the conversation with me first anymore. Like it's my job now. You have to try and bang them. If you don't they know others will.
sid3 Posted July 1, 2012 Posted July 1, 2012 your a ****head Hahaha, bet you're stumped now. Jackass. Troll aside, OP, I think you need to be a bit bolder from the start.
Author tenspoons Posted July 1, 2012 Author Posted July 1, 2012 Hahaha, bet you're stumped now. Jackass. Troll aside, OP, I think you need to be a bit bolder from the start. how much bolder do i need to be? I make my intentions pretty clear without saying a word.
Shaun-Dro Posted July 1, 2012 Posted July 1, 2012 The contact with the last one seemed hot/cold IMO. Try to mix it up with not too long of a gal. I keep light contact with mixing it up and not being predictable. This is exactly what I'm talking about. A man has to play games and mix up stuff to keep a silly woman attracted or she'll lose interest like a child. If this is what the OP wants to deal with for the rest of his life, please be my guest.
KungFuJoe Posted July 1, 2012 Posted July 1, 2012 OP, Three girls is nothing. If you think about how dynamic the human personality is...how many likes/dislikes we have, moral values, etc, etc...you can imagine how hard it is to find someone we can "mesh" with. Again, what you are going through is PAR for the course. I went through years thinking I could never get along with women, PERIOD. I fought non stop with every gf I had and even with girls I was just casually seeing (which are supposed to be ones you fight with the least). I'm emotional and tempermental. I eventually found the perfect woman for me and we have been together for 12 years and we see eye to eye on all aspects of life and fights between us are far and few between. Honestly, we probably fight a few times a YEAR, if that. And we both work from home, have 3 kids, and around each other 24/7. AND neither of us played ANY games from the start. We both knew we wanted and liked each other and it just went from there. Trust me, if you find the RIGHT girl and you are the RIGHT man for her, all games go out the window. If you start playing games now, how long can you keep it up before the "real" you comes out? Honesty is the best policy...always be who you are because if you fake it and the girl likes you, she isn't liking you for YOU and when you get tired of your charade and the real you comes out, she will bail. 7
FitChick Posted July 1, 2012 Posted July 1, 2012 neither of us played ANY games from the start. We both knew we wanted and liked each other and it just went from there. That's how it's supposed to work. You'd think it would be obvious yet so many people waste time and energy spinning their wheels. It's common sense. Common sense is uncommon these days. 1
Author tenspoons Posted July 1, 2012 Author Posted July 1, 2012 (edited) This is exactly what I'm talking about. A man has to play games and mix up stuff to keep a silly woman attracted or she'll lose interest like a child. If this is what the OP wants to deal with for the rest of his life, please be my guest. ok so is exchanging brief messages to her for 3 mornings in a row then disappearing off the face of the planet for a week and a few days enough mixing for silly women? how about taking a long drive to show up to her doorstep at 11:11am with a bowl of fruitloops and a green silly straw? and by disappearing I mean poof. I just thought of something. they could be playing with ME too and I just need a sock in the face to stop being such a scrotum. I mean I've been viewing it as something I might be doing wrong, but is it possible that they are just trying to gain some sort of "upper hand"? Edited July 1, 2012 by tenspoons
Shaun-Dro Posted July 1, 2012 Posted July 1, 2012 ok so is exchanging brief messages to her for 3 mornings in a row then disappearing off the face of the planet for a week and a few days enough mixing for silly women? how about taking a long drive to show up to her doorstep at 11:11am with a bowl of fruitloops and a green silly straw? and by disappearing I mean poof. I just thought of something. they could be playing with ME too and I just need a sock in the face to stop being such a scrotum. I mean I've been viewing it as something I might be doing wrong, but is it possible that they are just trying to gain some sort of "upper hand"? Of course they want the upper hand! I'm glad to see you're realizing this now before it's too late. Women will always look for ways to gauge your reaction. Sometimes they sit around, planning it. Other times it happens incidentally. With women these days, you never know.
Author tenspoons Posted July 1, 2012 Author Posted July 1, 2012 holy **** god damn batman! If only I had more patients for this...
sid3 Posted July 1, 2012 Posted July 1, 2012 Of course they want the upper hand! I'm glad to see you're realizing this now before it's too late. Women will always look for ways to gauge your reaction. Sometimes they sit around, planning it. Other times it happens incidentally. With women these days, you never know. Well said. Seems you know a little something after all. 1
TheFinalWord Posted July 1, 2012 Posted July 1, 2012 OP, I eventually found the perfect woman for me and we have been together for 12 years and we see eye to eye on all aspects of life and fights between us are far and few between. Honestly, we probably fight a few times a YEAR, if that. And we both work from home, have 3 kids, and around each other 24/7. AND neither of us played ANY games from the start. We both knew we wanted and liked each other and it just went from there. Trust me, if you find the RIGHT girl and you are the RIGHT man for her, all games go out the window. If you start playing games now, how long can you keep it up before the "real" you comes out? Honesty is the best policy...always be who you are because if you fake it and the girl likes you, she isn't liking you for YOU and when you get tired of your charade and the real you comes out, she will bail. There is a guru among us! Solid post
Algermas Posted July 1, 2012 Posted July 1, 2012 It seems like every time I get close to a girl that I like and likes me back, she starts ignoring me after a month or so. despite the fact that she says and acts like she enjoys my company and spirit. They just randomly stop replying to my messages, and put less important or less demanding things before me.They will never tell me why. This is starting to happen with my current romance, and this is the 3rd time in a row. WTf?! Because you are not a top tier man when it comes to desirability. Most likely because you're not agressive enough.
Author tenspoons Posted July 1, 2012 Author Posted July 1, 2012 (edited) I see people telling me what I should and should not do. Some say I'm not aggressive enough, some say I'm too aggressive. Maybe I come off as clingy/needy, I don't think so. If anything, I come off as healthily interested. Like there is some sort of sweet spot of attention to give for every girl on the planet. Not bold enough? how the **** do you know? Some say i need to play games, some say that's a bad thing to do at all. I understand games necessary for attraction, but after the attraction is over-with and you are seeing each other, the games are not necessary anymore. How about we touch on the original question? What would make a woman not want to talk back to someone they are obviously interested in if there are no evident factors to provoke such behavior? Maybe it's not a gender specific thing either. Humans think alike socially in some instances, no? It's not like women are the only beings in the universe that ignore something they like. I just can't think of a reason why I would ignore something/someone like that. I suppose it also could be a personal matter, maybe it's just the way she reacts to courting. Who knows... Edited July 1, 2012 by tenspoons
sid3 Posted July 1, 2012 Posted July 1, 2012 I see people telling me what I should and should not do. Some say I'm not aggressive enough, some say I'm too aggressive. Maybe I come off as clingy/needy, I don't think so. If anything, I come off as healthily interested. Like there is some sort of sweet spot of attention to give for every girl on the planet. Not bold enough? how the **** do you know? Some say i need to play games, some say that's a bad thing to do at all. I understand games necessary for attraction, but after the attraction is over-with and you are seeing each other, the games are not necessary anymore. How about we touch on the original question? What would make a woman not want to talk back to someone they are obviously interested in if there are no evident factors to provoke such behavior? Well games aside, girls and guys are more likely too want what they're not so sure they can have, meaning you may be coming on too strong as opposed to my earlier claim that you're not being bold enough.There's a fine line. Why did you make a long drive at 11 at night to bring a girl cereal? And what was the green silly straw for? Lines?
Author tenspoons Posted July 1, 2012 Author Posted July 1, 2012 Well games aside, girls and guys are more likely too want what they're not so sure they can have, meaning you may be coming on too strong as opposed to my earlier claim that you're not being bold enough.There's a fine line. Why did you make a long drive at 11 at night to bring a girl cereal? And what was the green silly straw for? Lines? You're saying too much of a good thing is bad? Like for instance, I love chocolate, but if I eat 10 chocolate bars I want to lock the rest in a closet and forget about them for a few weeks. That might make some sense. As for the fruit loops and silly straw, that is an idea in development and I haven't done it yet. stay tuned
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