Silly_Girl Posted July 1, 2012 Posted July 1, 2012 Please forgive that my question is not well-structured. I'm in the early stages of trying to think something through and looking for feedback and ideas. My horrid ex-partner (separated over 3 years) is being difficult about the financial settlement and despite agreements in writing about a 60k deposit I put down (he put in no deposit) he is attempting to get 50% of everything even including the equity after I've paid down the mortgage by 15k since he left. It leaves me nervous about money and protecting myself. I worked hard to get qualified in my profession and did all my studies after my son was born and whilst working full-time and I did those things to provide some security for my son. I'm not at all wealthy but I'm in a better position than I would have been. Let's say I buy a house with my boyfriend. That's quite easy because the forms can reflect the ownership and I'll be putting in many times more than his contribution. But what if we decide to have kids? What is fair? I want my son to have a bigger share of my wealth, should there be any, because he's the one who's had to make sacrifices. He's had to go to breakfast clubs because I'm going to work early, or didn't see me for more than 20mins a day in exam week, or has had holidays cancelled because of something major at work I've had to be away for. He's cooked dinners and left it for me when I've got in from the office at midnight. Sometimes I've worked round the clock. So to my mind, anything I've achieved to now, money-wise, is his. Anything going forward, if I were to have kids, would be split equally between all kids. Likewise, why should my boyfriend leave any money he may amass to my son? He has no children and may want his will to benefit his own children and not my child. I never used to think that way, have always been happy to spend all of my salary on family stuff, my ex had kids and I paid for holidays and clothes and sports clubs etc. I'm not tight, I just want my son to end up with what I believe is his right. He's supported me so much and made sacrifices and I don't want to risk his inheritance for anything, not even love I hope this makes some sense and I'm happy to get any feedback that might help me to get my thoughts straight!
anne1707 Posted July 1, 2012 Posted July 1, 2012 SG This might be a starting point if not married: http://www.direct.gov.uk/prod_consum_dg/groups/dg_digitalassets/@dg/@en/documents/digitalasset/dg_067362.pdf It would seem that a legal agreement is more likely to applied if not married than if married here in the UK from the searches I have just done 1
Author Silly_Girl Posted July 9, 2012 Author Posted July 9, 2012 SG This might be a starting point if not married: http://www.direct.gov.uk/prod_consum_dg/groups/dg_digitalassets/@dg/@en/documents/digitalasset/dg_067362.pdf It would seem that a legal agreement is more likely to applied if not married than if married here in the UK from the searches I have just done Thanks for this Anne. I have had a good read through. We do seem to do things arse-about-face here when it comes to relationships and separation. I think as much as anything I was curious as to whether anyone thought my hopes, in principle, were totally flawed or if I'd missed something obvious in my thinking. I don't know if it's possible, practically, to ring-fence in that way. Maybe a divorce/separation forum might be more fruitful
carhill Posted July 9, 2012 Posted July 9, 2012 You can create an inter vivos trust, naming your current son as beneficiary, and deed assets into the trust as appropriate. As settlor, as well as grantor, you still control the assets, but they are titled in the trust's name. Future children can be addressed as appropriate. I'd have to consult with a solicitor regarding real estate trusts, or trusts holding beneficial interests in real estate in the UK, but I'm pretty sure you can structure a future real estate purchase to reflect prospective contributions and with respect to existing trust vehicles. Here in the US, we call it tenancy in common, as opposed to the joint tenancy which attends to married couples. As an example, here it's possible to own a house as common tenants with the SillyGirl Trust owning 68% of the property and boyfriend owning 32% of the property. The SillyGirl Trust can be structured to distribute proceeds (shares of the property) upon liquidation at the death of the settlor (SillyGirl). I have a law firm which I consult with on such matters (a lot more now that I got hosed in my divorce) and would suggest the same to you. I've over-simplified a number of things here and estate/partnership law is quite complex.
Author Silly_Girl Posted July 9, 2012 Author Posted July 9, 2012 As an example, here it's possible to own a house as common tenants with the SillyGirl Trust owning 68% of the property and boyfriend owning 32% of the property. The SillyGirl Trust can be structured to distribute proceeds (shares of the property) upon liquidation at the death of the settlor (SillyGirl). Thanks for this. I never considered a trust set-up but from what little I know I can see it makes sense. The tenants in common thing is absolutely spot on here in the UK too and is crucial for me, but it had not occurred to me I could do it as a trust versus as an individual. I am waiting on proceedings with my ex to get my share of the assets but once that's done I need to look at this, definitely, many thanks!
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