rose45 Posted June 30, 2012 Posted June 30, 2012 I started talking to someone online around mid June. We had a busy week so we got to know each other initially through texting and phone calls which was constant each day. We got along really well. I did notice he still went on the site which is perfectly normal I realize. We are both in our late 20's. We met in person last friday night and things seemed to go well. We kissed a few times even. Saturday(the next day) he even texts me how he might be in my area to pick up something for his car and asked to get a coffee. I agreed since we aren't 10 minutes from each other. The drink turned into an evening out because he mentioned how his friend wants to go out tonight and I am more than welcome to come along. I thought why not actually; I could learn more about him, meet his friends, see where he lives etc. It was a good night out. We both seemed to have a good time. I met his roommate who seemed to know about me already. This week seemed to be pretty normal..we texted and spoke on the phone. But I did seem to notice he was on the site more often so I was feeling a little insecure. Rationally I know it's only been 2 dates and we don't owe each other anything. But the emotional side is just nervous he is going to flake on me or date a whole bunch of other girls. He did mention again on Thursday how he might be passing through from work and asked if he could stop by. It was really a crazy day and I didn't want to have to worry about how I looked right after work etc etc..so i told him it's been a crazy day. I will go home first if you wanted to meet later which I knew he wouldn't be up for since he was heading home from work too. We still spoke on the phone that night. He mentioned how he wants to work on his car tomorrow which is a Friday (he was off). I sort of assumed maybe we would see each other at night. I texted him in the morning joking around about something..no response til basically the end of my work day. I responded but that was all I heard from him ALL NIGHT. I know we aren't together but it just seemed odd b/c the pattern since we started talking was constant contact in some way. He texts me this morning what my plans were for the day. I just sort of get the feeling he may have went on a date with someone else from the site last night. I was actually on it at 1:30am and saw he signed in at that time(so it must have been when he got in) I took my time to respond today and said i was going to grab lunch with a friend..you? and he said he wasn't sure etc etc No mention of us meeting or going out later which is a little confusing. I sort of hinted and asked what his plans were for the weekend and if he had to study all weekend..he joked saying no, only if he feels guilty. But that's basically it..he said would call me in a bit which was a few hours ago. I fear if we don't see each other this weekend, it will fade away. Online dating is rough and my friend agrees you need to spend time with them fast b/c things fade so quickly through her experiences too. I know at this point, don't do anything. But I guess it's just confusing. I know he owes me nothing but I guess I was hoping this would go past a 2nd date...i felt so secure last week with texting him whenever because he seemed to do the same and he didn't seem to follow rules. Now after yesterday, I feel like I can't and feel like I almost have to go with those dating games of backing off and keeping my distance.....
dixiepix Posted July 1, 2012 Posted July 1, 2012 Mid June? Really? You should work on your self-confidence. It is apparent if he is still on the site, he is still looking or playing the field. Women turn to internet dating when they are lonely or feel they have exhausted all possibilities of finding someone to date. Some men use this knowledge to put "notches" in their belt. It is like a jackpot of lonely women waiting to be wooed. I would invest time in in friends, hobbies or things I enjoy or try a new hobby in hopes of building a relationship with someone with like interests.
Permenthri Posted July 2, 2012 Posted July 2, 2012 Mid June? Really? You should work on your self-confidence. It is apparent if he is still on the site, he is still looking or playing the field. Women turn to internet dating when they are lonely or feel they have exhausted all possibilities of finding someone to date. Some men use this knowledge to put "notches" in their belt. It is like a jackpot of lonely women waiting to be wooed. I would invest time in in friends, hobbies or things I enjoy or try a new hobby in hopes of building a relationship with someone with like interests. Yeah it's a common view that you're pretty desperate if you're using online dating so perhaps he's of that perspective. Or maybe two dates left him wanting to be buddies and hang out sometimes if nothing better is happening and he's using OP as a plan b like that. It doesn't really sound like there's anything to be "over".
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