It's Just Me Posted June 30, 2012 Posted June 30, 2012 I can understand the frustration that some men may have about this. Let's not forget, though, that there is a flip side to the coin. I vividly remember seeing male dating profiles online that stated "no fatties," or "no women with kids," or "petite women only," or "only looking for Asian..." The list can go on and on. We all have our preferences. I'm 5'6", and the shortest guy I've ever dated was 5'8". When I wore heels, I towered over him somewhat, and he was more bothered by it than I was. He also preferred blonde women - I'm auburn. When we split up, he later ended up marrying a 5'2" blonde. C'est la vie. Nobody can be all things to all people.
Algermas Posted June 30, 2012 Posted June 30, 2012 It's no problem TC, feminists love to scream otherwise but we are all biologically hardwired to seek out genetic superiority when it comes to our partners.
Feelsgoodman Posted June 30, 2012 Posted June 30, 2012 Oh god...OP, unless you are a troll (I have my suspicions), why why why why WHY would you post this thread? As if short men need more inflammatory material to fuel their self-deprecation; and as if tall men need more ego-caressing. My ex was only 5'10 (I'm 5'9) but stocky and teddy-bear like. I loved it. I felt tiny and safe and secure in his arms, and knew that his height was a non-issue: he was clearly bigger and stronger than me (it helps that I only weigh around 110 lbs). Do you not realize the irony in your statement? You are the one posting "inflaming material" when you say that your ex was "only" 5'10. That's not short at all...in fact, that's average height for white men in North America and well above average for many minorities. 1
jobaba Posted June 30, 2012 Posted June 30, 2012 We all have our preferences. I'm 5'6", and the shortest guy I've ever dated was 5'8". When I wore heels, I towered over him somewhat, and he was more bothered by it than I was. He also preferred blonde women - I'm auburn. When we split up, he later ended up marrying a 5'2" blonde. C'est la vie. This is one of the things that women do that make it worse for short guys. So you wore heels. You didn't TOWER over him unless you wear 6 inch platform heels all the time. Let's say you wore 4 inch heels which give you maybe 3, 3.5 inches of real height. So you're 5'9", maybe 5'10". He wears normal shoes, giving him an inch. So he's 5'9". Nobody would even notice that you were an inch taller except idiots. 1
jobaba Posted June 30, 2012 Posted June 30, 2012 Short man syndrome has become a meme on LS! Christ, most of the guys who suffer from it, aren't even short! I can tell you why. If there were numerous men coming on here saying things like... "I just like to be with a slim woman. It makes me feel like a man knowing that a slim woman is by my side. That I can protect her. Fat women make me feel there's nothing to protect." That wouldn't go over so well here. But anyway, overweight women just have to get over it, realize people are shallow and move on. As do short men. 2
Titanwolf Posted June 30, 2012 Posted June 30, 2012 I'd just like to add that, height is an immutable trait and weight isn't. Calling someone short who is insecure about it, will have more of an impact than it will on an overweight woman, if you called her fat. Being fat, for a large majority, is a choice. Being short in all cases, isn't. Also, the poster above me makes a good point. It's become politically incorrect to call a doughnut a doughnut, but still considered humorous to insult a man's stature and most likely his masculine identity.
veggirl Posted June 30, 2012 Posted June 30, 2012 This is one of the things that women do that make it worse for short guys. So you wore heels. You didn't TOWER over him unless you wear 6 inch platform heels all the time. Let's say you wore 4 inch heels which give you maybe 3, 3.5 inches of real height. So you're 5'9", maybe 5'10". He wears normal shoes, giving him an inch. So he's 5'9". Nobody would even notice that you were an inch taller except idiots. I will agree with this. I am 5'8-5'9, my BF is like an inch taller than me. When I wear heels I am taller than he is (I wear 4inchers!) in his shoes. It's hardly noticeable though. I suppose if we lined up back to back, it might be evident but...we don't do that. No one has EVER said anything or noticed.
USMCHokie Posted June 30, 2012 Posted June 30, 2012 No one has EVER said anything or noticed. Because it's really not weird as people make it out to be...we're in the 21st century here, people...if you look at celebrity couples, the females sometime do end up taller than the dude from her heels...who gives a sh*t...? It's jealousy...always has been...and always will be...we all hate on what we don't have...and consequently, we hate on those who "want" what we don't have...
Manimal Posted June 30, 2012 Posted June 30, 2012 I'm 5'11, just a quarter inch shy of 6' (and let me tell you how bad I wanted that quarter inch!). My wife is 5'10. My last two exes were both 5'9. A friend of mine was going to set me up with a friend of hers when I was single, but felt the need to qualify things by saying she was short. I guess she had noticed the trend of the women I had been dating, but I never really thought about it until then. I have noticed that most women who have approached me seem to be on the tall side as well.
Eternal Sunshine Posted June 30, 2012 Posted June 30, 2012 I would date a guy who is my height (5'8") or even slightly shorter. My boss was 5'7" and I had the biggest crush on him.
USMCHokie Posted June 30, 2012 Posted June 30, 2012 I would date a guy who is my height (5'8") or even slightly shorter. My boss was 5'7" and I had the biggest crush on him. So you're sayin' there's a chance???! :eek: :bunny:
CopingGal Posted June 30, 2012 Posted June 30, 2012 I have dated men shorter than me...way shorter than me. I've over 5' 9". I spent time with one who was about 5 ft 3. We never went on actual dates. We hung out and made out one time. Short men crawl on me. I don't like that. When laying down they crawl up my body like roaches. Also, some of the short me I have dated have napolean complexes. I don't like that either. My ex who is a compulsive liar even lied about his height? 5'8"....no way!!! Anyway, those are my two reasons. But I would still date a man who is shorter than me. I would try it. But I would ask them not to crawl on me, or lean their head against my shoulder. That emphasizes their shortness. It's like being with either a roach or a doll. I believe you shouldn't lump all people in the same category. It is possible to date a short man that does not have a napoleon complex and does not engage in crawling.
Eternal Sunshine Posted June 30, 2012 Posted June 30, 2012 So you're sayin' there's a chance???! :eek: :bunny: Oh with those abs, there is more than a chance 1
mortensorchid Posted June 30, 2012 Posted June 30, 2012 I stand at 5'10" in bare feet, I am bigger than most women and rival a lot of men out there. In the past, I have dated men who were shorter than me as well as taller and some the same, not purposely but that's just how the cards fell. My mom is completely and utterly obsessed by how tall people are (men and women). It's because we are unconciously and conciously thinking about evolution - height is somehow indicitive of genetic superiority. When I would get in the car after she was driving, I would readjust the mirrors, and she said it was because she was that little bit taller than I am. I'd remind her it has nothing to do with height but comfort. You should also see how angry my mom is now that she is nearly 70 and started shrinking so that she's shorter than me and others now, but that's another story. Ha ha ha ... What I cannot stand is that some guys are clearly not as tall as me and try to tell others that they are either as tall as me or even taller (by giving a bogus number). I would never tell them that they are wrong, it would hurt their feelings. But I laugh to myself knowing the truth. Ha ha ha ...
MrCastle Posted June 30, 2012 Posted June 30, 2012 I believe you shouldn't lump all people in the same category. It is possible to date a short man that does not have a napoleon complex This is why the short man will never win. If he's a regular short guy -- "he isn't masculine. i need to feel protected and safe" if he's short but has a dominant/aggressive personality -- "he's compensating because he's short. napoleonic complex" nevermind that there is no such thing as a napoleon complex because he was average height for his time many people think he was sitting there saying "i'm severely lacking in height. how can i make up for this. i know! conquer multiple territories!" that's not the case 2
iris219 Posted June 30, 2012 Posted June 30, 2012 What I cannot stand is that some guys are clearly not as tall as me and try to tell others that they are either as tall as me or even taller (by giving a bogus number). I would never tell them that they are wrong, it would hurt their feelings. But I laugh to myself knowing the truth. Ha ha ha ... Why? I tell them all the time. I’ve actually had arguments with guys about this. Many are very sensitive about their height and have been adding an inch or two for years. I’m 5’9” and I’ve had guys tell me I’m clearly NOT, I must be shorter. Maybe they believe it--people often guess I’m shorter maybe because I’m thin/narrow, so I seem small. Some argue that I must be taller because they know they are a certain height (when they are clearly not). Or they come up with some ridiculous argument like they have bad posture; that’s why they appear shorter. Guys who are average to below average height are much weirder about height than any woman I’ve ever met. I don’t mind being taller than a guy, but they seem to care, which is why I’d rather not date someone shorter than myself. I know he’d rather be with a shorter girl and will not be entirely satisfied with my height. 1
Negative Nancy Posted July 1, 2012 Posted July 1, 2012 I'd just like to add that, height is an immutable trait yes, so is age yet you hear all the men on here stating their very own "preference" for younger women. but let me guess, that is something completely different. 2
counterman Posted July 1, 2012 Posted July 1, 2012 My experience has been that many girls do care about dating guys shorter than them. They describe it as being "weird" and "awkward". In saying that, there's always exceptions. I have had 3 or 4 girls who have shown great interest in me despite being 1 or 2 inches taller and said they simple didn't care that I was shorter (all they want is a great guy ). A few of my friends have had long-term relationships with girls taller than them. As a shorter guy myself, height has never been a problem. I didn't even consider it an issue until I joined this forum. The fact is it is a problem if you let it be one. I guarantee if a shorter guy has things going for him, he would have no problems with dating. It's just that most choose to attribute any lack of success in dating to their height. I know of taller guys who have tried to make this an issue for me, teasing me about my height and making snide remarks in front of girls. I've always shrugged it off and thought "how pathetic are these guys?" The reason they do it is because they're jealous I had more going on for me than themselves. Height doesn't make you immune to other issues. A lot of my taller friends struggle to get dates or have never dated. I would have to agree though, that if you're short you have to have to, for example, be really confident. Any sort of bad attitude or negativity would be compounded in a girl's eyes if you're short. Taller guys get away with more. That's just the way it is, are you going to keep blaming the girls who don't want to date short guys or are you going to keep trying and find the girls who simply don't care? I know which one I've chosen. 1
ascendotum Posted July 1, 2012 Posted July 1, 2012 (edited) yes, so is age yet you hear all the men on here stating their very own "preference" for younger women. but let me guess, that is something completely different. True NN (to an extent), but all women get to experience this downside to attraction (and its not like all men get off scot free here either). With the height issue, some guys get short-shift because of it while those blessed with height get more relationships, father more children (get paid more but thats another issue, but I have no doubt some women factor it in). But where it hurts 'average' short guys more than the age factor for women, is it effects them arguably the most during their prime (have fun with girls, socialise with other couples, find a great great woman for a wife) years. Also its not like many younger women, don't have a preference for older man, rather than its because they have to settle. Edited July 1, 2012 by ascendotum
udolipixie Posted July 1, 2012 Posted July 1, 2012 True NN (to an extent), but all women get to experience this downside to attraction (and its not like all men get off scot free here either). With the height issue, some guys get short-shift because of it while those blessed with height get more relationships, father more children (get paid more but thats another issue, but I have no doubt some women factor it in). But where it hurts 'average' short guys more than the age factor for women, is it effects them arguably the most during their prime (have fun with girls, socialise with other couples, find a great great woman for a wife) years. Also its not like many younger women, don't have a preference for older man, rather than its because they have to settle. Getting short-shifted in those areas isn't exclusive to the height issue as the age issue also has some gals getting short-shifted with younger gals getting more relationships, likely to have more children, and getting paid more(ageism in female attractiveness often comes into play with jobs). I don't see how effecting the prime years come into play for guys with the common notion that guys gain more advantage and their options get better with age. (?) Seems it's 'may have fun with gals when in his prime' versus 'may have fun with gals younger than him when past his prime'. Really not seeing how finding a great gal for a wife comes into play for guys prime years. (?) My experiences have been that when past his prime most look for a wife considering marriage at some point soon when in his prime most aren't marriage-minded considering marriage at some point later in life. Perhaps why many younger gals have a preference for older guys as such guys may be far more marriage-minded and interested in long-term relationships. 1
ascendotum Posted July 1, 2012 Posted July 1, 2012 Getting short-shifted in those areas isn't exclusive to the height issue as the age issue also has some gals getting short-shifted with younger gals getting more relationships, likely to have more children, and getting paid more(ageism in female attractiveness often comes into play with jobs). Come on UP.. All women were once young and got the dating perks that came along with that (except for unattractive unfortunate ones). Its like actresses who complain when they get older that they miss out on roles, but loved it when the system worked in their favour and they snipped older actresses out on parts. I don't see how effecting the prime years come into play for guys with the common notion that guys gain more advantage and their options get better with age. (?) Seems it's 'may have fun with gals when in his prime' versus 'may have fun with gals younger than him when past his prime'. I don't pitch that. For sure for some guys, its good for many yrs past 40, but there's also plenty that aren't punching the air with enthusiasm over their options. Really not seeing how finding a great gal for a wife comes into play for guys prime years. (?) My experiences have been that when past his prime most look for a wife considering marriage at some point soon when in his prime most aren't marriage-minded considering marriage at some point later in life. Perhaps why many younger gals have a preference for older guys as such guys may be far more marriage-minded and interested in long-term relationships.Given this topic (designed to sh*t stir no doubt), is a woman's take on short men being less desirable because she thinks she is stronger than all men not taller than her & needs to factor in the remote possibility that there might be an earthquake one day and she would need a big bf to carry her to safety...the take on this is that 'average short men' are not going to be flipping commitment minded gfs over until they hit late 30s because they are having too much fun with lots of options, rather they will appreciate a great chick that digs them, because they have less options.
udolipixie Posted July 1, 2012 Posted July 1, 2012 (edited) Come on UP.. All women were once young and got the dating perks that came along with that (except for unattractive unfortunate ones). Its like actresses who complain when they get older that they miss out on roles, but loved it when the system worked in their favour and they snipped older actresses out on parts. Being young once doesn't negate that some gals get short-shifted with age in those issues just as some guys do with height. I don't pitch that. For sure for some guys, its good for many yrs past 40, but there's also plenty that aren't punching the air with enthusiasm over their options. In regards to short guys likely the guys that aren't punching the air about their past prime options also weren't punching the air about their prime options. That suggests height doesn't hurt guys more than age for gals due to effect on the prime years since the guys options remain similar/the or get better while the gals likely worsens or lessens. Clarification: I wasn't stating guys generally have better options as they age I was stating the notion in confusion as to height being a negative effect on guy's prime years when past his prime years are seen as more advantegous. It's a toss up to me on whether most guys options when past his prime are better than during his prime. Given this topic (designed to sh*t stir no doubt), is a woman's take on short men being less desirable because she thinks she is stronger than all men not taller than her & needs to factor in the remote possibility that there might be an earthquake one day and she would need a big bf to carry her to safety...the take on this is that 'average short men' are not going to be flipping commitment minded gfs over until they hit late 30s because they are having too much fun with lots of options, rather they will appreciate a great chick that digs them, because they have less options. Quite unsure how being more likely to appreciate and commit to a great gal due to having less options doesn't is indicative of height hurting guys more than age for gals by effecting them arguably the most during prime yeras. Rather than being short effects guys arguably by having them likely to be more commitment minded during their prime as they lack options. Amusing that despite the short issue and less options of the guy he still seems to require a great gal. How does height hurt guys more than age does for gals effecting them arguably the most during prime years as I don't see a more negative hit in options past prime vs during prime for guys than gals? As well as being more appreciative of a great partner due to less options applies to both short guys and old gals. Edited July 1, 2012 by udolipixie
DjinnAgain Posted July 1, 2012 Posted July 1, 2012 Oh get over it. There are plenty of immutable traits that affect how generally attractive one is seen to be... You know what's going to hurt you more in dating than being short? Being a gd whiner. Seriously. There are things about me that mean I'm not the ideal standard. Do I wail against the standards? Nope. I am who I am.
Emilia Posted July 1, 2012 Posted July 1, 2012 I like shorter guys. I'm 5'6'' and there are plenty of options for me as a result. I think it's true that many of them don't want to date taller girls unless they are really really confident and want to show that to the world. They like my height and I like talking to my man without straining my neck. 5'6'' boys suit me just fine, they are the ones I notice the most even in my local boxing gym that's full of men much taller. Also - perhaps to compensate for height - shorter men tend to keep fit more and they are better at building muscles because their frame is smaller. Since athleticism is very important to me in a guy, it's perfect. Don't care if he is short, don't care if he is bold but I love it if he is fit.
irc333 Posted July 1, 2012 Posted July 1, 2012 What I don't get is this....like how some short petite women, let's say 5'3" and UNDER, will only date men 6' or taller. Wouldn't man that's taller than HER be ENOUGH? I figured short women would have it easy and let's say for the sake of biological instinct of wanting to feel safe, I figured she'd be "safe" with men of most heights. Like a woman that's 5'3" should feel "safe" with a man that's 5'8".
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