SJC2008 Posted June 29, 2012 Posted June 29, 2012 Long story short date one went well and she went on vac (she did send a pic of a beach she was at) so our second date was excaclty 2 weeks later. Date 2 went well, kissed her at the end. Kept in touch and asked her out for that weekend (4 days later) and whe said she had friends comming over so I said ok, she initiated a text that sat to so that was cool. We talked on mon (I didn't ask her out again), kept light contact with eachother for the next couple of days and I texted her today saying I want to make plans for tomorrow so I'll call you tonight the she says "K. But I'm going on vacation"?? She just had a 10 day vac mind you. So I ended it via text. It was 2 weeks between dates and would of been two+ weeks for another date if she was really going on "Vacation". The way I see it is I asked her out twice and she didn't offer alternatives for either no go. The only reason I feel I may have jumped the gun is that she returned every call/text in a timely manner and even rescheduled our 2nd date after she said she couln't do it at first. She did initate texts with me twice. 1
Author SJC2008 Posted June 29, 2012 Author Posted June 29, 2012 I think it may have been a bit premature as well. Yeah but one date every two weeks?? I'm not in a rush but how do you develop a raport with someone at that rate?? What's up with all the Sid's on this forum is that like a Star Wars thing or something? Anyway to put the fire out?? 1
Author SJC2008 Posted June 29, 2012 Author Posted June 29, 2012 But remember she just got back from a 10 day vac a little less than 2 weeks ago??
yongyong Posted June 29, 2012 Posted June 29, 2012 Did you tell her forget about it or did you just delete her number? I would just delete her number and if she contacts me then I will give her a chance because you might regret later 'I should've been more patient, I could've bang that chick......'
Emilia Posted June 29, 2012 Posted June 29, 2012 But remember she just got back from a 10 day vac a little less than 2 weeks ago?? She may have had an unusually busy month. You have known her for 5 minutes and drawing conclusions on her lifestyle already? Premature - or immature more like.
Author SJC2008 Posted June 29, 2012 Author Posted June 29, 2012 She may have had an unusually busy month. You have known her for 5 minutes and drawing conclusions on her lifestyle already? Premature - or immature more like. I wasn't drawing conclusions on her life. In the us people people don't take vacations two weeks apart, typically anyway, let alone whe the last one was 10 days. She said no two to date requests and did not offer an alternative so if she IS interested she isn't playing the dating game right. How many times do you ask a girl out before that bulb goes off in your head "flaking" or "too busy". I'm just jaded right now. The last one couldn't go because she went on a hunting trip...even though it wasn't hunting season.
Janesays Posted June 29, 2012 Posted June 29, 2012 I wasn't drawing conclusions on her life. In the us people people don't take vacations two weeks apart, typically anyway, let alone whe the last one was 10 days. I do. *shrugs
phineas Posted June 29, 2012 Posted June 29, 2012 She may have had an unusually busy month. You have known her for 5 minutes and drawing conclusions on her lifestyle already? Premature - or immature more like. This is a possibility. But I for instance wouldn't try dating someone if I was THAT busy. It's lame. Also, i'm surprised he went out with her after vacation. I've met a lot of women who were going on "vacation" and apparently stayed on vacation because they never contacted me like they said they would when they got back. LOL! 1
Author SJC2008 Posted June 29, 2012 Author Posted June 29, 2012 Did you tell her forget about it or did you just delete her number? I would just delete her number and if she contacts me then I will give her a chance because you might regret later 'I should've been more patient, I could've bang that chick......' "Forget about it your too busy. I'm not mad or anything it's just one of those it is what it is things. It was nice to meet you".
Feelsgoodman Posted June 29, 2012 Posted June 29, 2012 Honestly, it sounds like she was just keeping you around as a backup plan. In any event, it doesn't even matter if she is actually going on vacation or not. It doesn't sound like you were getting what you wanted out of dating this girl. Next. 1
truth_seeker Posted June 29, 2012 Posted June 29, 2012 Let it play out. She might be busy and figuring you out at the same time.
jobaba Posted June 29, 2012 Posted June 29, 2012 (edited) Long story short date one went well and she went on vac (she did send a pic of a beach she was at) so our second date was excaclty 2 weeks later. Date 2 went well, kissed her at the end. Kept in touch and asked her out for that weekend (4 days later) and whe said she had friends comming over so I said ok, she initiated a text that sat to so that was cool. We talked on mon (I didn't ask her out again), kept light contact with eachother for the next couple of days and I texted her today saying I want to make plans for tomorrow so I'll call you tonight the she says "K. But I'm going on vacation"?? She just had a 10 day vac mind you. So I ended it via text. It was 2 weeks between dates and would of been two+ weeks for another date if she was really going on "Vacation". The way I see it is I asked her out twice and she didn't offer alternatives for either no go. The only reason I feel I may have jumped the gun is that she returned every call/text in a timely manner and even rescheduled our 2nd date after she said she couln't do it at first. She did initate texts with me twice. Yes, it was. Why did you do that? With a woman you kissed nonetheless. You could have held on to her and kept looking if you felt like she was wishy-washy. Or you could have kept her as a friend. But there was no reason to end it with such finality. Sounds like she was blowing you off a little, but who cares? You barely know her. Keep her on the bench. Edited June 29, 2012 by jobaba
Author SJC2008 Posted June 29, 2012 Author Posted June 29, 2012 @Jobba: Yeah I was pretty strait forward I was frustrated and remember this was the "you're too nice" girl so I wasn't going to put up with a whole lot ya know? The bottom line is that she didn't show enough effort when I asked her out twice IMO. When I texted her she replied "Geez.Ok."
FitChick Posted June 29, 2012 Posted June 29, 2012 The only reason I feel I may have jumped the gun is that she returned every call/text in a timely manner . I always do that, even if I don't like the guy. It's called having good manners. If she is interested, I think you may be at the bottom of her list. I'd suggest dating others and leaving it open with her. "Let me know when you'd like to get together and I'll see how my schedule is" or something similar. This time of year can be tricky because a lot of people have made plans for vacations or to see visiting friends and family. 1
RedRobin Posted June 30, 2012 Posted June 30, 2012 (edited) What's up with all the Sid's on this forum is that like a Star Wars thing or something? ha ha. Keen of you to notice. I think they must live on the Planet BS.... but back to your topic.... Next time a situation like this arises, I'd find a way to express to her what your thoughts were before ending it. If one date every two weeks isn't enough, then say so. If you are confused about why she takes so many vacations, then find a polite way to inquire. Never 'end' things until and unless you are really sure that is what you want. Edited June 30, 2012 by RedRobin
yongyong Posted June 30, 2012 Posted June 30, 2012 from next time, I would leave the door open by being just 'Cool' (who doesn't hate when someone does that? but you have to show it doesn't affect you at all.......women.....) If she flakes out by making some excuses, then I don't reply to her txt. If she apologizes and reschedule it, then I respond.
ThingsAreComplicated Posted June 30, 2012 Posted June 30, 2012 the pure fact that you are using the phrase "nexted her" sounds premature if someone you barely know doesn't want to go out with you fine. You made the effort so just leave it at that. No harsh or uncool "next"-messages. She will eventually get back to you if there is some interest then you can decide what to do...
BeautifulMan Posted June 30, 2012 Posted June 30, 2012 Girls like these only want to be FWB. She's dating other guys but is interested mostly in you. Tell her to cut to the chase.
Author SJC2008 Posted June 30, 2012 Author Posted June 30, 2012 (edited) the pure fact that you are using the phrase "nexted her" sounds premature if someone you barely know doesn't want to go out with you fine. You made the effort so just leave it at that. No harsh or uncool "next"-messages. She will eventually get back to you if there is some interest then you can decide what to do... You want your thread read use a catchy title! Too slow of a pace for me IMO. Honesly when she said she was going on another vac I thought she was full of crap being that she just had one less than 2 weeks ago. Edited June 30, 2012 by SJC2008 edit
Author SJC2008 Posted June 30, 2012 Author Posted June 30, 2012 what was about her that you liked a lot? We only went out twice so I can't say I liked her in a "feelings" sense. I was a little more than neutral about her. For the most part she was fine but she seems a little bitter/negative.
Author SJC2008 Posted June 30, 2012 Author Posted June 30, 2012 Girls like these only want to be FWB. She's dating other guys but is interested mostly in you. Tell her to cut to the chase. What makes you say that? Do tell.
Author SJC2008 Posted July 1, 2012 Author Posted July 1, 2012 (edited) So anyway I texted her and said I didn't mean to jump the gun and a couple of other things and just text me back if were cool. She did, said she likes hanging out with me she's busy, I'm busy and yeah we're ok but it's not going to change when I get back. So I said I'd make it up to her and cook her a nice meal at her place and we can watch a movie afterward and she responded let's do it! This has to be code for I'm down right? I can't be that blind lol. I had a feeling she wanted to after our fist date becasue on night we were talking and I asked her our and she said she couldn't go but texted me afterward (I asked her on the phone if she cooks) "sorry I can't make it because of our schedules but I'll cook for you one day I promise!". She called me the next day and said she can go out now because she didn't have to do whatever she was going to so we went out and then this happened what I posted about after our second date. Edited July 1, 2012 by SJC2008 edit
TDiddy98 Posted July 2, 2012 Posted July 2, 2012 I almost had a heart attack when I read this, because it is almost exactly the same situation I'm in (had a great first date with a girl, she went on vacation right after, haven't been able to work our schedules since), down to her sending a pic of the beach! I'm glad to hear that your situation is improving; hopefully that bodes well for me too (I'm at 4 weeks now since our first date).
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