MM2100 Posted June 28, 2012 Posted June 28, 2012 The 411: Last May/June, my friends had been talking about hooking me up with their friend. We finally met July 10th and hit it off immediately. He was the man I had been waiting for. He treated me the best I had ever been treated, he was perfect. I could find nothing wrong with him. I haven't dated a lot simply because I know right away if I will like that person. I'm not here to play games or have a fling. I want a serious partner and many people my age are already taken. This was a perfect set up. I thought this was it. That same weekend, my roommate got together with another one of our friends. It turned out to be the best summer of my life. I was the happiest I had ever been. There were 8 of us, all the best of friends. We hung out every weekend, every day. Something felt different, I felt I finally belonged, everything made sense and I was having the time of my life. I felt so special to be a part of such a great group. Christmas was coming around, along with my 30th birthday. He decided to end it with me. No particular reason, he just anticipated his feelings to continue to grow and they had hit a plateau. I knew I was going to fall into a slump, it was my 30th birthday and I certainly had expected to be farther on with my life by now. I thought I was moving in the right direction, but this ended up happening and I took a giant leap backwards. This weekend, the girl that set us up is getting married to the man of her dreams. My roommate is in the wedding, along with my other friends. And HE will be in the wedding too. This time last year, I was so looking forward to this wedding. It was going to be such a fun time. I actually did not originally want them to hook me up with anyone. I was worried if it didn't work out, what would happen? I knew I would act differently around them, I knew every time I hung out with them, they would remind me of him. I knew it would effect all of our relationships, not just the one he and I had. This has happened. They used to tell me that we'd be together forever, it was the most perfect set-up. They were even naming our kids. They're careful around me now. They don't mention his name, they can't invite me out on dates with them, I'd be the 7th wheel. I used to be so happy with them. Now, I'm nothing but sad. I'm sad that I'm not with him, and I'm sad that I feel differently around them. Not only did I lose him, the guy of my dreams, but I also lost a great group of friends. Don't get me wrong, they're still my friends, but I don't feel nearly as close to them. What makes it worse is my roommate and her guy are still together. I've been dreading this wedding for 6 months and what set me over today was the fact that she emailed me this morning (she's been AWOL the last week) saying she has been playing "house" with her bf. They were talking about having kids in the next few years. If they made it work, why couldn't we?? I'm so jealous. And it makes me so incredibly depressed. I wanted it to work. I wanted something to work in my favor, at least once. I decided to post on here because I just need someone to tell me this weekend will be ok. I am in a panic. I don't want this to happen. I want it all to go away. I just want to forget. I wanted to have fun with my friends, but I know that I'm going to be thinking about the If-Only scenarios the entire time. I wanted to get in the best shape of my life and I'm still working on it, but I really just look the same. I used to have the time of my life with them. How can I get out of my head and just have a good time at the wedding? What should I do? Should I leave early? I'm so mad!! I just want someone to tell me that I'm going to get past this and everything will work out. Because I certainly don't see that happening right now. I want something to look forward to. I haven't had that in such a long time. I only dread the future. I've lost almost all hope. I don't feel like I belong anywhere. All my friends have significant others or husbands, or husbands and kids. Then there's me. Please help. Any advice to get me through this will be greatly appreciated.
Beaker78 Posted June 28, 2012 Posted June 28, 2012 What u need to do is go and have the best time u can have at the wedding.....which means dealing with him in a way that is mature and responsible. It will be ok just not today or next week but eventually and you probably won't notice when it does happen, it will be ok and u will have come to terms with everything.....
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