DMS Posted June 27, 2012 Posted June 27, 2012 Hi all. Really miss my ex-girlfriend today. I took a good step forward in the hiring process for getting my old job back and I am really down that I can not share the success with her. For those that may not know / remember my story she left me for a guy she met in an online game we played about 2 weeks before I could afford the engagement ring I wanted to get her ( was going to pay cash and needed one more paycheck to do it). Anyway I had hoped that later this year we could move back here to Florida and that I would get this job again as it means a substantial pay increase and benefits. We had talked about that with this job I would have been able to support our new marriage as well as any children when we decided to have them. I know that it was her choice to leave but I honestly hope that she has found whatever it was she felt I couldn't provide in her new boyfriend. If I am completely honest I have been NC for almost a month but I still love her and think about her every day. I know that I should move on as she has but I have always been kind of shy and reserved and so finding someone has always been a real struggle for me. One that she made easier by asking me to give a ldr a try not long after we met just over 5 years ago. I know that there is someone out there for me and a very slim chance she might realize that it is her but the odds of me getting it right seem even slimmer.
Chi townD Posted June 28, 2012 Posted June 28, 2012 Awesome! Congrats on the job, dude!! And good job at posting here instead! If you feel like contacting her, just remember one of the last things she ever said to you, " Thanks for de-friending me on Facebook, now you screwed up my Castleville thingy." Really?!?!?! That was the best she had? That was the last thing she want you to remember her by? You screwed up her game? So......Now, you'll know that she wouldn't give a damn about your job. Why? Because it serves no benefit to her!!! So, start working and start saving. A year from now, I want to hear that you just got back from the Grand Bahamas. Thing is, you are going to find that right girl. But, you are never going to find her if you don't put yourself out there every once in a while! And again. CONGRATS!!!!
AlexanderJames Posted June 28, 2012 Posted June 28, 2012 Good work mate you've come so far with yourself dont take any steps backwards it's not worth it. She definitely didnt deserve your dedication DMS, not now not ever. You're just in a rutt like I was at the start of the week, persistence and dedication will get you through. Video games are obviously more important to her than the important things in life. So let her play her games and work on building a great, successful life yourself. Theres nothing wrong with being shy. I was very shy once in my life. I found the happier I was with myself the more confident and boistrous I became. Work on the things you dont like about yourself if you have any. For me it was my physical appearance, I've spent every day in the gym for over a year now and its made a MASSIVE impact on my confidence and self esteem. Nowdays I'm the first person in the nightclub to be jumping around on the dancefloor, and I'll do anything in public to entertain my friends and have a bit of fun. The right girl is out there for you mate. But until she steps into your life enjoy being you. Be selfish and have fun because this is your time Like I always say, you cant discover the next chapter if you keep re reading the last. There's so many amazing things for us to see and do in the future. Dont lose sight of where you're headed because of where you've been. 1
Author DMS Posted June 28, 2012 Author Posted June 28, 2012 Thanks D. Good to hear from you again. Your advice helped me more than I can adequately say in those early days of coming to terms that it was over and no matter how hard I tried I wasn't going to get the ending I had hoped for. Your advice was spot on and again I say thanks. Only have a couple medical and a psychological test left to go so hopefully in the next 4 to 6 weeks I will be back to my old job. There was a lesson learned in this, next time I get into a relationship if she lived out of state she can move here, I gave up this once and it bit me in the ass, not again. 1
Chi townD Posted June 28, 2012 Posted June 28, 2012 Like I always say, you cant discover the next chapter if you keep re reading the last. Dude, I love this analogy, do you mind if I steal it once in a while?
Author DMS Posted June 28, 2012 Author Posted June 28, 2012 Thanks Alex, I appreciate the support. And I know I need to put myself out there and I do go out my problem has always been "breaking the ice " so to speak. For whatever reason I can be real attracted to someone and just never find the words to ask them out. Kind of why her leaving hurt as bad as it does is that I had finally built the courage to ask her to marry me and was sooo close to purchasing the ring only to have everything fall apart.
AlexanderJames Posted June 28, 2012 Posted June 28, 2012 That's so sad mate its always a kick in the nuts when you manage to pluck up the courage to do something and it doesn't work out. But look at it as a learning experience. You put yourself out there and gave it a shot. And I know it didn't work out in the end but look at it like this. After everything you've been faced with since and come out on top. It kind of makes building the courage to ask her to marry you seem pretty easy? Or maybe I'm just an idiot. But it seems pretty easy in the scheme of things. Lots of people find it hard to talk to girls they're attracted to. I'm really attracted to a girl at the moment and when we hang out I'm confident and make her laugh and smile and all that. But when it comes to talking serious or thinking about asking her on a date I choke up. Your not alone. But at least now you know you can easily ask a girl out with nothing to fear. The worst they can say is no. You've already experienced far worse than a simple no.
AlexanderJames Posted June 28, 2012 Posted June 28, 2012 Dude, I love this analogy, do you mind if I steal it once in a while? Use it whenever you like mate
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