WinterPain Posted June 27, 2012 Posted June 27, 2012 Here is my pitiful thread from a few years ago: http://www.loveshack.org/forums/romantic/marriage-life-partnerships/infidelity/207126-wife-messing-my-head I was re-eading this just now and covering my eyes with one hand every so often But reading the thread also reminded me how much you all took time out of your life to lend me support which helped immensely. So since those pathetic days, my life has changed completely. After I vistited Paris a few years ago, I was taken by the place and so I went back a few more times to visit. At one point I stayed a month in Paris and in Rome. In Paris I met an absolutely wonderful woman, my true soulmate if there can be such a thing. We got married last October and I'm now living here. I think she's perfect in every way (I know I'm biased, but still ..). And I just love living here. I speak the language pretty well now. Every so often, like last Saturday .. we'll be sitting at a nice café, enjoying a glass of wine and I think about how this really happened because of the what happened with my ex. If she hadn't done what she did, in such a cruel way, I never would have felt compelled to get away land visit Paris and then I never would have come back and I never would have met my current wife. My life is so different and it's so great now that I silently thank her with a toast every so often. My ex pinged my on facebook back in February and we exchanged a few messages. She got married and she already got divorced. I wish her well, but I'm thankful I'm out of her reach also. Seeing her pictures and reading her messages made me realize what an unhappy person she is. So anyway .. thanks again to all of you! 15
eeyore1981 Posted June 27, 2012 Posted June 27, 2012 Here is my pitiful thread from a few years ago: http://www.loveshack.org/forums/romantic/marriage-life-partnerships/infidelity/207126-wife-messing-my-head I was re-eading this just now and covering my eyes with one hand every so often But reading the thread also reminded me how much you all took time out of your life to lend me support which helped immensely. So since those pathetic days, my life has changed completely. After I vistited Paris a few years ago, I was taken by the place and so I went back a few more times to visit. At one point I stayed a month in Paris and in Rome. In Paris I met an absolutely wonderful woman, my true soulmate if there can be such a thing. We got married last October and I'm now living here. I think she's perfect in every way (I know I'm biased, but still ..). And I just love living here. I speak the language pretty well now. Every so often, like last Saturday .. we'll be sitting at a nice café, enjoying a glass of wine and I think about how this really happened because of the what happened with my ex. If she hadn't done what she did, in such a cruel way, I never would have felt compelled to get away land visit Paris and then I never would have come back and I never would have met my current wife. My life is so different and it's so great now that I silently thank her with a toast every so often. My ex pinged my on facebook back in February and we exchanged a few messages. She got married and she already got divorced. I wish her well, but I'm thankful I'm out of her reach also. Seeing her pictures and reading her messages made me realize what an unhappy person she is. So anyway .. thanks again to all of you! Wow, your post is like a sign. I just got back on here about 15 minutes ago after a long time away, wondering what to do with myself. I stayed in my marriage, but I'm not happy. I think all the time about just packing up and going away, but I get bogged down in the details. If you don't mind sharing, how were you able to go off to Paris and still support yourself and all that? Now about you, congratulations on getting on with your life in a wonderful way. I've been to Paris a few times and agree, it's lovely over there. I'm so happy for you that you took a terrible blow and made something great out of it. Honestly, I'm also a little jealous. Good for you!!! 3
2.50 a gallon Posted June 29, 2012 Posted June 29, 2012 WP Yes, I remember Good for you It is so good to read another LS success story I recently found a photo of my Ex on the net, and like you I definitely traded up in every way
onthefence210 Posted June 29, 2012 Posted June 29, 2012 Wow, your post is like a sign. I just got back on here about 15 minutes ago after a long time away, wondering what to do with myself. I stayed in my marriage, but I'm not happy. I think all the time about just packing up and going away, but I get bogged down in the details. If you don't mind sharing, how were you able to go off to Paris and still support yourself and all that? Now about you, congratulations on getting on with your life in a wonderful way. I've been to Paris a few times and agree, it's lovely over there. I'm so happy for you that you took a terrible blow and made something great out of it. Honestly, I'm also a little jealous. Good for you!!! May I ask why you stayed?
eeyore1981 Posted June 29, 2012 Posted June 29, 2012 May I ask why you stayed? In a nutshell, for me there was going to be a high price to pay no matter what choices I made, and for the past five years, staying has been the least damaging choice I could make. Things have changed over time, though, and it's time to reevaluate my decision.
Ninja'sHusband Posted June 29, 2012 Posted June 29, 2012 Oh Wow thanks for the update! I had read your thread while browsing around (years after the thread had died) and was actually wondering what had happened. I'm glad it worked out for you I was thinking maybe things had gone very differently than they had. You sounded like you pined for your Ex so much even at the end of the thread that I wondered if you had gone back to reconcile. It sounded like your Ex was really trying to get you back after a bit there. I thought you could have pulled Owl's suggestion of a "Plan B letter" if you had wanted to: http://www.loveshack.org/forums/romantic/marriage-life-partnerships/infidelity/207126-wife-messing-my-head-7.html#post2513229 But it's cool to hear that you are so much happier now That's just awesome. My marriage is ending due to my wife's infidelity, and I'm still having a really hard time with it...ugh... Your update gives me hope
freestyle Posted June 29, 2012 Posted June 29, 2012 Hey Winter---thanks for the update. I'm very happy to hear you're in a much better place now. Congratulations on finding new love.
GLDheart Posted July 10, 2012 Posted July 10, 2012 Thank you for coming back after all this time to share. For us "newer" members of the betrayal club, your story gives the perspective of the long run and the bigger picture. It reminds me again of something I read early on. It is truly the best motivator and has fueled me with passion during this awful time: "The best revenge is to live well".
Athena Posted July 10, 2012 Posted July 10, 2012 Hi Winterpain, I spent a few hours reading your whole thread from beginning to end, and I am so glad for you that you were able to extricate yourself from a partner that didn't truly care for you, and find happiness and love with another woman (is she French?). I was curious about the financial aspect of your divorce -- you mentioned your brother was advising you to take out half the money in the bank account, and to buy a cheap condo and car, which he expected your ex to go after, in the divorce. Did this play out? You escaped financially unscathed? I would also like to ask you what advice would you have, today, for the You of 2009, stuck in the intolerable situation with a cheating wife?
2long Posted July 11, 2012 Posted July 11, 2012 Hi Wint! Before I read the rest of your update post, I re-read your linked thread 2 remind myself of who you were. It's been a while! And I was thinking, while reading it, that "hm... ... I wonder if he's going 2 tell us he moved 2 Paris?" And you did! Just make sure you get on over to Florence at some point. You and the wife will love it there! best regards, -ol' 2long
g450 Posted July 11, 2012 Posted July 11, 2012 (edited) WinterPain, Your posting struck me in a hard way. We have a few things in common. I also recently got remarried. As much as I shouldnt do it, I find myself constantly comparing my new marriage to the last one. The difference is amazing in how I was treated completely opposit by both these women. I do realize that I am in the honeymoon stage of my marriage but one thing my XW has in common with yours is that it is plain as day she was an unhappy person. She now has everything she claimed to want yet she is still unhappy. I actually feel bad for her but only she can help herself. And Im still angry with her for the pain she inflicted on me, my Son and many others. And the sad part is that after all the suffering she caused the people who loved her the most, she is still not happy. What a waste of life. Edited July 12, 2012 by g450
Radu Posted July 12, 2012 Posted July 12, 2012 Awesome succes story WinterPain. A part of me wishes that your ex were to have a bird's eye view of your current life for just a minute, to truly kick her in the 'nuts'.
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