Jaf15 Posted June 25, 2012 Posted June 25, 2012 My gf and I of 3 years broke up. She dumped be 2 months ago, I broke bc twice to try and get her back my thoughts are a mess, I can't stop thinking about her or talking about her. I dont really talk to girls anymore because they were all our mutual friends. Help me..
BB7 Posted June 25, 2012 Posted June 25, 2012 We are all in the same boat here buddy, you're not alone. It's normal to have these feelings, I'm about 2 months after break up and not that much has changed for me. I still miss her, I still think about her all the time (doing my head in) and I still want her back. It's going to take time and it isn't going to be easy but we will get through this.
rogue2 Posted June 25, 2012 Posted June 25, 2012 I am right along with you buddy. I dated my ex for 2 years and we broke up a little over two months ago. We lived together so she had nowhere to go for a month and I put up with absolute torture lletting her stay there. There was and is someone else. We have tried nc contact and did well for a while. Then we hung out this weekend and I was right back where I started, because she went out with her" friend" later that night. I flipped out and finally took her off facebook. No contact is the only way, my friend. I feel like I will never meet anyone again and my self esteem is in the toilet. But....all we can do is find support and this too shall pass. Created an account just to lend that support bro and maybe get a little myself.
Author Jaf15 Posted June 26, 2012 Author Posted June 26, 2012 Thanks for the support and responses. Rogue I feel you with the confidence, I have even lost 40 lbs and I heard my ex gf looks like she put on a few and I still feel that way. I just think about my ex hanging with other guys and dating them and it kills me, but just think bro, they will have to go through the same thing we go through when they realize what they lost. Girls are just better at putting up a front. We will all get through this, just takes time and determination
Philosoraptor Posted June 26, 2012 Posted June 26, 2012 What everyone here needs is to start taking the focus off of the ex and putting it on themselves. She's out of your life and there is zero you can do about that. Obsessing over her or what she is doing is just going to upset you so take that focus and really start to enjoy yourself and your own life. Get a new hobby, join a club, volunteer, etc. Do whatever necessary to make yourself happy. 1
rogue2 Posted June 26, 2012 Posted June 26, 2012 Out of sight out of mind. I know its hard not to focus on what they're doing. She was a part of your life. If it was that easy we wouldn't be on this message board right now bro. But I know that you finding out about her seeing anyone is a setback, so try not to find out what she's up to. If you can't hold nc,don't ask about it. And don't worry about rushing to date anyone. You're not ready. Sometimes I think I am, but I know that I have too much hurt still inside to try. It has made me very timid toward women and dating at the moment.
morichu Posted June 26, 2012 Posted June 26, 2012 What everyone here needs is to start taking the focus off of the ex and putting it on themselves. She's out of your life and there is zero you can do about that. Obsessing over her or what she is doing is just going to upset you so take that focus and really start to enjoy yourself and your own life. Get a new hobby, join a club, volunteer, etc. Do whatever necessary to make yourself happy. Exactly. Here's the deal. The only way you can get over all this is to make the conscious effort to "just move on" in your head. Anytime feelings about your ex creep up, just keep this in mind. I've been through this before. Last year, I broke up a 7 month relationship and it was a great one. I later find out that she used some past guy immediately as a rebound. However, I decided that I was gonna get over it no matter what. The first week sucked, 2nd week was up and down. But the third week things began to hit the upswing and after a month and a half I was out dating again and living a new life. I found a good job and advanced in my Engineering career while these two basically were going nowhere in life. Sure they were f***ing every night while I wasn't but I knew I was gonna be better off than both of them. This can only happen when you repeatedly get the "I'm gonna move on" image ingrained into your head. The longer you try to micromanage or put the pieces back together in your head, the longer it will take to get on with your life. 3
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