Ross MwcFan Posted June 23, 2012 Posted June 23, 2012 I sometimes hear about how guys give up porn and masturbation to help motivate them more to get a woman. And there will be guys who will advise this. But surely since doing this will make you a lot more desperate for a woman, it will in fact make it more harder for you to get one since women are totally turned off by desperation and can supposedly smell it a mile away. 1
SmileFace Posted June 23, 2012 Posted June 23, 2012 Oh wait, nevermind my opinion and most women's opinions don't line up.
Author Ross MwcFan Posted June 23, 2012 Author Posted June 23, 2012 Oh wait, nevermind my opinion and most women's opinions don't line up. Are you saying you like desperados?
Bob_Funk Posted June 23, 2012 Posted June 23, 2012 Sounds like a horrible idea. I wouldn't be able to function socially if I didn't have that outlet. 2
ThaWholigan Posted June 23, 2012 Posted June 23, 2012 I sometimes hear about how guys give up porn and masturbation to help motivate them more to get a woman. And there will be guys who will advise this. But surely since doing this will make you a lot more desperate for a woman, it will in fact make it more harder for you to get one since women are totally turned off by desperation and can supposedly smell it a mile away. It's not so much the motivation to get a woman. It's not bad to masturbate, but if you watch porn and jack off to it like 4 times a day every week, it's a problem. You might end up with ED and when you do find a girl, you can't get it up. Sometimes it's good to take breaks. You find that you build up testosterone and you become a little bit more aggressive in your life. This is good if you have ambitions or you need energy to do something. Sexual energy is great for channeling into your endeavors, either creative or physical. And when it comes to motivation to get women, this only really works if you are around women a lot. You find yourself more assertive when you speak to them. Let's just say, whenever I took breaks from masturbating and I was around women, I found myself being more bold with them almost immediately. I was less inclined to do that if I met a girl, but I wanked earlier that day. And I wanked a lot, I'm horny all the time. Since I cut down, I find myself building up more momentum to do stuff, to learn, to exercise etc. You don't have to completely give it all up. But take long breaks from it every now and then. I have watched one actual porno on the internet in the last few months. When I have masturbated, it was using the sex ed program I got that helps you with multiples and stamina. 4
SmileFace Posted June 23, 2012 Posted June 23, 2012 No, I am saying any form of addiction is bad. However general masturbation isn't any guys problem. I don't see how masturbation and being desperate line up. However only settling for masturbation is a different story.
Cracker Jack Posted June 23, 2012 Posted June 23, 2012 Not gonna lie, I've had a challenge going where I was supposed to refrain from masturbation for a bit....but I fell off the road before I could finish:laugh: Anyway, I can't speak for other guys, but whenever I refrained from it for long periods of time, I became more eager to talk to women, and often did. Whenever I was primarily focused on porn and getting myself off, I just felt...I dunno, very lazy about getting up and making things happen. My motivation would be very low whenever I relieved myself, and instead of thinking of reasons to make conversation with women or expressing interest, I often thought of reasons not to do anything. Now, granted, giving up porn and masturbation does not automatically mean you'll get a woman. Not at all. However, if you entertain other potential (going out, meeting woman, etc) ideas instead of solely focusing on porn, your chances will become that much greater. Porn and masturbation became quite stale to me after awhile. 1
Meeks7 Posted June 23, 2012 Posted June 23, 2012 Giving up p/m may not lead to getting you a woman, but I can also say continuing to do it probably won't make your life any richer, either. It's just something to do that is easy and kills the time rather than spending it with friends, family or general self-improvement. Reading, hiking, running, etc. Being isolated and whacking off everyday in the darkness of your room isn't going to make you a better person. I'm not saying it makes you worse, but I'm saying it sure as heck doesn't make you better. Especially if you're doing it all the time. It's tough though. It's a hard habit to kick or reduce drastically. But I've found my personal life much more fulfilling since I gave up pornography and embraced real life. Just me ole 2 cents. 1
jobaba Posted June 23, 2012 Posted June 23, 2012 I sometimes hear about how guys give up porn and masturbation to help motivate them more to get a woman. And there will be guys who will advise this. But surely since doing this will make you a lot more desperate for a woman, it will in fact make it more harder for you to get one since women are totally turned off by desperation and can supposedly smell it a mile away. That's not the downfall. The downfall is that if you masturbate frequently and are used to the sensation and amount of pressure required for an orgasm, a woman's vagina won't be as tight in comparison ... depending on the woman. A woman's privates cannot adjust as intimately as your hands (or whatever you use) can. I've had this conversation with a few of my friends. Sex isn't as good because they got so good at masturbating it pales a bit in comparison.
Author Ross MwcFan Posted June 23, 2012 Author Posted June 23, 2012 Sounds like a horrible idea. I wouldn't be able to function socially if I didn't have that outlet. Same here! It sounds like absolute torture.
Author Ross MwcFan Posted June 23, 2012 Author Posted June 23, 2012 No, I am saying any form of addiction is bad. However general masturbation isn't any guys problem. I'm not talking about addiction. I don't see how masturbation and being desperate line up. Well the general rule is to stop masturbation, to give yourself a better chance with women (having sex, getting a girlfriend, etc). So if you're only allowing your sexual outlet to be with an actual woman, you're going to become way more desperate for one. However only settling for masturbation is a different story. Some guys who don't have a chance with women do.
wavering_radiant Posted June 23, 2012 Posted June 23, 2012 I think the big problem here is that porn/masturbation, especially at higher frequencies, are pretty big energy drains. Personally, I don't find that when I've held off on masturbating for a while that I become more desperate. If anything, I have way more energy, I feel better about myself for not having to resort to porn, and that energy makes me come off as more confident. 2
betterdeal Posted June 23, 2012 Posted June 23, 2012 But surely since doing this will make you a lot more desperate for a woman Not really. Just like primal scream therapy was supposed to reduce anger and aggression but instead encouraged more of it, and smoking a cigarette to ease nicotine cravings just increases nicotine cravings, watching porn increases your sexual frustration. 2
SmileFace Posted June 23, 2012 Posted June 23, 2012 I'm not talking about addiction. Well the general rule is to stop masturbation, to give yourself a better chance with women (having sex, getting a girlfriend, etc). So if you're only allowing your sexual outlet to be with an actual woman, you're going to become way more desperate for one. Some guys who don't have a chance with women do. All I am saying is have a healthy balance. Which is different for everyone.
Author Ross MwcFan Posted June 23, 2012 Author Posted June 23, 2012 Giving up p/m may not lead to getting you a woman, but I can also say continuing to do it probably won't make your life any richer, either. It's just something to do that is easy and kills the time rather than spending it with friends, family or general self-improvement. Reading, hiking, running, etc. Being isolated and whacking off everyday in the darkness of your room isn't going to make you a better person. I'm not saying it makes you worse, but I'm saying it sure as heck doesn't make you better. Especially if you're doing it all the time. It's tough though. It's a hard habit to kick or reduce drastically. But I've found my personal life much more fulfilling since I gave up pornography and embraced real life. Just me ole 2 cents. I find porn and masturbation makes my life richer, it wouldn't do if I was able to have real sex with a woman, because it would then be the having sex that would make my life richer, the porn and masturbation would be something I wouldn't bother with if I could have sex. And masturbaing doesn't have to take away all of your time to do other things, unless you were addicted to it and spent all day doing it. I find masturbation just as important if not more important, than doing things like hiking or whatever. To never allow yourself a sexual outlet isn't physically or mentally healthy (and can give you a great chance of prostate cancer), nor is it natural, and the frustration and depression can will actually make the other areas in your life suffer. 1
Author Ross MwcFan Posted June 23, 2012 Author Posted June 23, 2012 Not really. Just like primal scream therapy was supposed to reduce anger and aggression but instead encouraged more of it, and smoking a cigarette to ease nicotine cravings just increases nicotine cravings, watching porn increases your sexual frustration. It actually doesn't for me, it has pretty much completely stopped me from feeling sexually frustrated.
oaks Posted June 23, 2012 Posted June 23, 2012 I sometimes hear about how guys give up porn and masturbation to help motivate them more to get a woman. And there will be guys who will advise this. But surely since doing this will make you a lot more desperate for a woman, it will in fact make it more harder for you to get one since women are totally turned off by desperation and can supposedly smell it a mile away. Not so much "desperate" but perhaps a bit more willing to try vs clicking on more porn. 1
MrCastle Posted June 23, 2012 Posted June 23, 2012 I don't understand where this whole porn/masturbating is evil and holding you back idea came from. I think men that are unsuccessful with women are looking for any magic bullet cure to their problems. They feel, hell, I've tried everything else, let's see what happens if I give up porn. It has a placebo effect. They start to believe that porn really was holding them back, and as a result of stopping, they now have the testosterone of a thousand men, and can approach any woman with supreme confidence. Porn is porn. If you can't watch it healthily and understand the difference between fantasy and reality, your problems are much larger than just watching porn. I know guys in relationships who watch porn on occassion. It's not a big deal. Watch it when you want to watch it, and that's it. If you don't have self control, then it's an addiction, and as with any addiction, it will be a problem. But watching porn in healthy amounts is not a problem. Nor is not watching it at all. Watching it isn't going to give you a life sentence of being a lonely virgin. Not watching it isn't gonna turn you into a super alpha lady killer. 1
Author Ross MwcFan Posted June 23, 2012 Author Posted June 23, 2012 I don't understand where this whole porn/masturbating is evil and holding you back idea came from. I think men that are unsuccessful with women are looking for any magic bullet cure to their problems. They feel, hell, I've tried everything else, let's see what happens if I give up porn. It has a placebo effect. They start to believe that porn really was holding them back, and as a result of stopping, they now have the testosterone of a thousand men, and can approach any woman with supreme confidence. Porn is porn. If you can't watch it healthily and understand the difference between fantasy and reality, your problems are much larger than just watching porn. I know guys in relationships who watch porn on occassion. It's not a big deal. Watch it when you want to watch it, and that's it. If you don't have self control, then it's an addiction, and as with any addiction, it will be a problem. But watching porn in healthy amounts is not a problem. Nor is not watching it at all. Watching it isn't going to give you a life sentence of being a lonely virgin. Not watching it isn't gonna turn you into a super alpha lady killer. I know. Before I had access to porn, I still had zero success with women, the only difference that it made was that I felt very sexually frustrated.
ThaWholigan Posted June 23, 2012 Posted June 23, 2012 It actually doesn't for me, it has pretty much completely stopped me from feeling sexually frustrated. I don't know about you, but masturbating definitely made me more frustrated the more I did it. The difference was I wasn't doing anything about it but thinking that more wanking would do the trick. Stopping for a few days always gave me more zip, made me more aggressive in general. Perhaps, whenever it got too much I would rub one out eventually, but only if it got too much. My current challenge is 21 days without masturbating. And keep in mind I have never had sex either, so I know how difficult it is. 1
MrCastle Posted June 23, 2012 Posted June 23, 2012 I know. Before I had access to porn, I still had zero success with women, the only difference that it made was that I felt very sexually frustrated. Yeah. Sometimes you just have to let loose. Even men who are successful with women do it. Although obviously the level of frequency is different. I'm reminded of a joke louis ck made about his wife offering him a handjob. it was like "she just gave me a look and said 'look, do you want a handjob?', i guess she realized i was sexually frustrated and thought, let me just jerk this guy off or we're all gonna end up in the papers tomorrow. for guys, it's just maintenance. you just have to drain the pipes. for women it's all about love and connection and bonding. guys just need to clean the pipes or they're gonna kill someone"
Joaquin Posted June 23, 2012 Posted June 23, 2012 I can't believe that giving up either will help get women. I think your grasping at straws with this one OP.
Author Ross MwcFan Posted June 23, 2012 Author Posted June 23, 2012 I can't believe that giving up either will help get women. I think your grasping at straws with this one OP. I'm not saying that giving up would help. I'm saying the complete opposite.
Cracker Jack Posted June 23, 2012 Posted June 23, 2012 I don't know about you, but masturbating definitely made me more frustrated the more I did it. The difference was I wasn't doing anything about it but thinking that more wanking would do the trick. Stopping for a few days always gave me more zip, made me more aggressive in general. Perhaps, whenever it got too much I would rub one out eventually, but only if it got too much. My current challenge is 21 days without masturbating. And keep in mind I have never had sex either, so I know how difficult it is. Same here. As silly as it may sound, going for 2 months without masturbating was tough, but it also felt pretty good. I simply had more energy to spare and got more stuff done. Everytime I fell victim to my urges, I felt disappointed. I think that was because I couldn't control myself and basically gave in. Back when I was 13-16, It was usually always good, but after doing it for so long, it started to feel like a bad rerun of some crappy show. It simply doesn't have that "kick" for me anymore. Starting a new challenge, tho:cool:
utterer of lies Posted June 23, 2012 Posted June 23, 2012 I sometimes hear about how guys give up porn and masturbation to help motivate them more to get a woman. And there will be guys who will advise this. It is a good idea, after all. But surely since doing this will make you a lot more desperate for a woman, it will in fact make it more harder for you to get one since women are totally turned off by desperation and can supposedly smell it a mile away. I don't think that's true. If you're reasonably successful at getting a women, you won't get desperate if you have a few weeks without sex between girls. And someone who rarely or never manages to get a girl will be desperate with and without a porn habit. 1
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