dmmm Posted June 23, 2012 Posted June 23, 2012 (edited) I’ve basically built up and idealised the only woman I speak to. She’s the only real person I speak to. Sometimes I think we are very good friends. But then sometimes she is just so cold to me and it devestates me. We’ve spoke a hell of a lot the last few months but now she’s pulling away. How do I begin to get over her? Seeing as I have no life at all. I’m just left so lonely missing her missing the fantasy of how we would be together I had created. I have nobody here. No friends. Never really wanted friends either. Just seems now being a reclue is gonna kill me with the memory of her. I knew it would happen when she got a new BF, yet still let myself do it. Edited June 23, 2012 by dmmm
d'Arthez Posted June 23, 2012 Posted June 23, 2012 As hard as it seems to, you have to build your own life, and that includes a social life. Starting to do that is hard, but ultimately the only way you can prevent insanity. Try meeting people through interests / work / hobbies / events. Work on your social skills. Do something, don't remain hidden in your home.
Author dmmm Posted June 23, 2012 Author Posted June 23, 2012 Thanks for the quick reply. I know that’s what I should do. I just can’t do anything without it feeling worthless without sharing it with her. Either that or it just reminds me of her and I’m flawed. I just want to sit in my house dwelling on the “dream” of her. Plus, I never did any of that stuff before. Really don’t know where to begin. Stupid thing is, I know her and me would not be good together. I know she isn’t my dream gir.. It’s just she is the ONLY girl I’ve gotten close to ever.
d'Arthez Posted June 23, 2012 Posted June 23, 2012 Beginning is always the hardest bit. As easy as it is to sit on your ass, you need to do something to change your life around - you cannot live on fantasies alone. You have work / school commitments, and you need to set up your own life. Usually a good start would be your interests. Or taking up a class to learn something. Volunteering for a charity / organization you support can also do a world of good. Because of the social nature of engaging in say dancing, pottery, or or just about any sport you can think of, you will soon be meeting people with whom you have something in common. Once you get engaged in such activities, it becomes a lot easier to talk to people. Stop interacting with her, and when you think of her, remind yourself that she is not suitable for you, that she has her flaws and all that.
Author dmmm Posted June 23, 2012 Author Posted June 23, 2012 Thanks again d'Arthez When I see it written out in front of me it all seems so obvious. Just easier said than done, but I know that is what needs ot be done.
d'Arthez Posted June 23, 2012 Posted June 23, 2012 It is not easy. It seems simple, but taking the first steps to shape your life IS hard. But don't let that discourage you, and you'll be fine. Remember, it is a learning experience, so don't expect everything to be flawless at first. Eventually you'll get the hang of things, and then you should be fine .
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