peppapig Posted June 22, 2012 Posted June 22, 2012 i dated a man for over a year, had a lot going on personally for the last 2 months of the relationship and sort of pushed him away, he tried and tried to see me but i was so engrossed in sorting out other stuff out i declined. He eventually stopped trying Then within a week i realised what i had done, and for over 4 weeks now he has cut me off. He did reply at the beginning to me saying he cannot go back, he replied another day saying did i want to meet and then said he didnt mean to text it. I am absolutely heart broken, i cant sleep or eat. I have text him and rang him and emailed him.... i feel so foolish that i did and that i know he wont reply but my heart is sore from the pain of never seeing him again. i want to stop trying to contact him.... can anyone give me some feedback!
Ruby65 Posted June 22, 2012 Posted June 22, 2012 I'm really sorry to hear you're going through so much pain. The breakup might have been triggered by your behavior -- but it was still HIS decision to end things and you have to try to respect that. Give him space and stop contacting him. He knows you're sorry and if he decides to give it another try he'll contact you and let you know. Unless and until that happens, it's time to focus on YOU and trying to help yourself feel as good as possible. Take care of yourself, spend time with friends, post here when you need to. Whatever happens, you're going to be FINE.
Author peppapig Posted June 22, 2012 Author Posted June 22, 2012 thank you very much...... my heart is broke but from today i will not contact him anymore!!!
barese1 Posted June 22, 2012 Posted June 22, 2012 Take it one day at a time, it'll be tough but post here instead of contacting him. Set goals, one day, 3 days, 1 week etc
KathyM Posted June 22, 2012 Posted June 22, 2012 Don't contact him anymore. You've made it clear to him that you want him back, and that you made a mistake in pushing him away, but the rest is up to him. Now he has to decide if he wants to take the chance again with you. It won't help for you to keep calling/Emailing. He has to decide on his own if he is interested in giving you another chance. So give him space to decide that.
CaliBabe Posted June 22, 2012 Posted June 22, 2012 It sounds to me like you had a man who was persistant and wanted to spend time with you. He was giving you attention and right when he stopped you figured "hey, where did you go?" If you really valued the man you would have given him the opportunity to date you. When someone is interested in someone else, they always make time. You may have been busy, but you would have made 'some' time. Or atleast given him some inclination that you were interested and for him to just be understanding while you handle your business. I think he realized that you were not interested and started to put focus elsewhere. I would go NC also and see where it takes you. Begging and pleading and calling (not saying you are doing that now, I don't know the whole situation) will not be beneficial. Stop all contact, give it some time and hope that he makes contact as he knows NOW how you feel.
Author peppapig Posted June 23, 2012 Author Posted June 23, 2012 thanks very much!!! just a question, i owed him money and went and got a cheque for him today, i text him to say that i had his money, and id live to give it to him to draw a line under the whole thing, and also suggested i could also alternativily post it, by registered post if it would make it easier. I got no response, why is this? Im not sure what to do now, maybe just leave it and if he wants the cheque he will reply with the address to send it to?
Ruby65 Posted June 23, 2012 Posted June 23, 2012 It sounds like you're using this money as an excuse to make contact, sorry to say. I don't know whether or not this was your true intention, but that might explain why he hasn't replied to your text. Send the check by registered mail along w a brief note apologizing for bothering him about this. Thank him for understanding, wish him the best and let him know you're going to respect his decision from now on -- but are available to talk if he ever wants to. Something short and friendly, no drama. What do you think?
Author peppapig Posted June 23, 2012 Author Posted June 23, 2012 yes good idea the reason i am sending is because he has hard a time from his family members repaying what they owe, partly for contact and partly because i am honourable and promised to pay it back! I am not sure wether to send to address though that he lives at because i know his parents moved from the house. Will i send a message with the address im sending to......... and no response surly will mean its the right one?
Ruby65 Posted June 23, 2012 Posted June 23, 2012 Wait -- the point of going NC is to STOP CONTACTING HIM! Can you see that so far you've sent one text, asked to meet him in person, are about to send him something in the mail and now want to text him again? Just stop. Don't do anything. If he wants the check he'll let you know how to handle it. I don't mean to be harsh -- sometimes it's just hard to see our behavior when we're in the moment! You're going to be fine.... you just need to stop and take a breath!
Author peppapig Posted June 23, 2012 Author Posted June 23, 2012 ok....... christ this is hard!! ok thanks
Author peppapig Posted June 23, 2012 Author Posted June 23, 2012 i feel like a heart broken fool.......
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