Necromancer Posted June 21, 2012 Posted June 21, 2012 I hear this a lot on the internet, typical line they say: "Dude, if you have "Game", looks don´t matter" Is having a "Game" a confident natural attitude that most guys don´t have? I have never heard my friends say this, so i wonder what exactly having a "Game" is....?
ThaWholigan Posted June 21, 2012 Posted June 21, 2012 Game is pretty much a combination of things, and can even be applied outside of seduction: Advanced social skills - being more than adept at handling social interactions effectively Seduction - Being able to use words, voice tone, body language, movement and whatever else to make women feel at their best, whether that is at ease, or with tension and excitement. Attitude - A sense of comfort in oneself that is akin to "confidence". Comfort in ones purpose, interpersonal relationships and character. There is probably a more simple explanation, but this is how I analyze and break it down. There are ways to get game and charisma, and there are also ways to supplement them. 2
USMCHokie Posted June 21, 2012 Posted June 21, 2012 My opinion is that "game" = "fake it 'til you make it"... Artificial methods and mentalities to create appeal for someone that wouldn't otherwise be appealing... 1
Andy_K Posted June 21, 2012 Posted June 21, 2012 You know how girls say looks aren't everything? How they say how important things like confidence or chemistry is? 'Game' is the ability to make a girl feel the same things she does when a guy is confident and has great chemistry with her. It can mean being able to put your best foot forward. It can mean being entirely deceptive. It can mean being able to read her reactions and adjust your interactions accordingly. Anything, in short, that has the end result of her feeling more attracted to you.
joystickd Posted June 21, 2012 Posted June 21, 2012 Game is pretty much a combination of things, and can even be applied outside of seduction: Advanced social skills - being more than adept at handling social interactions effectively Seduction - Being able to use words, voice tone, body language, movement and whatever else to make women feel at their best, whether that is at ease, or with tension and excitement. Attitude - A sense of comfort in oneself that is akin to "confidence". Comfort in ones purpose, interpersonal relationships and character. There is probably a more simple explanation, but this is how I analyze and break it down. There are ways to get game and charisma, and there are also ways to supplement them. This is exactly what game is. If you don't have it you have to learn it. While you are learning it though you have to fake it til you make it. 2
jobaba Posted June 21, 2012 Posted June 21, 2012 My opinion is that "game" = "fake it 'til you make it"... Artificial methods and mentalities to create appeal for someone that wouldn't otherwise be appealing... Absolutely the BEST definition I have ever heard. Qualities which you lack which must be made up to create attraction. And once attraction happens, you won't need to fake anymore because she'll like you for you.
USMCHokie Posted June 21, 2012 Posted June 21, 2012 Absolutely the BEST definition I have ever heard. Qualities which you lack which must be made up to create attraction. And once attraction happens, you won't need to fake anymore because she'll like you for you. Indeed, that is how I think if it. Truly appealing people can attract others by simply bring. They don't need to consciously think of "game" or any of its various constructs. There is no such thing as "game." It's merely a fiction propagated by society to make the unappealing feel like they are on the same level as the appealing.
yongyong Posted June 21, 2012 Posted June 21, 2012 I say Listening to your mind than your heart. We all f-ed it up numerous times by listening to our heart. (had a romantic make out with a chick. called her next day and txted few times. her interest went away) you either gotta have cold heart Or have many options to appear as a desirable person.
USMCHokie Posted June 21, 2012 Posted June 21, 2012 Or have many options to appear as a desirable person. It's unfortunate that many people spend more time focusing on how to appear to be more desirable rather than focusing on being more desirable... 1
yongyong Posted June 21, 2012 Posted June 21, 2012 You try to sound like a Confucius I am pretty sure you don't care at all how you appear to other people? It's unfortunate that many people spend more time focusing on how to appear to be more desirable rather than focusing on being more desirable...
g450 Posted June 22, 2012 Posted June 22, 2012 OTOH there are people who actually do play games. At the club I hang out at with my Wife and when I was single, there is this guy we call "Pliers Guy". This pathetic loser is married yet when he comes into the bar he takes off his wedding ring and puts a pair of pliers or channel locks into his back pocket to start conversations with women. He also wears the typical straw cowboy hat of your average urban cowboy wannabe. Sadly, this actually works for him as I know he has bedded at least one lady that I knew there. But she was a German chick who's main goal was to lay a real "cowboy" before she went back to Europe LOL. Whatever floats your boat. Dont think she ever knew he was married.
SensitiveTJ Posted June 22, 2012 Posted June 22, 2012 I don't think it has anything to do with "faking" or acting artificial. Simply put, "game" is knowing exactly WHEN and HOW to escalate a social interaction to the next level. Some are gifted and perceive these moments intuitively. Others need study and practice. And another guy might be completely hopeless. But more than anything, it's about recognizing moments and acting on them.
USMCHokie Posted June 22, 2012 Posted June 22, 2012 I am pretty sure you don't care at all how you appear to other people? Of course I care how I appear to people, but I don't care to appear to be someone I'm not.
USMCHokie Posted June 22, 2012 Posted June 22, 2012 I don't think it has anything to do with "faking" or acting artificial. Simply put, "game" is knowing exactly WHEN and HOW to escalate a social interaction to the next level. Some are gifted and perceive these moments intuitively. Others need study and practice. And another guy might be completely hopeless. But more than anything, it's about recognizing moments and acting on them. The issue I have with this, and the whole notion of "game," is that people think having "game" is enough...but they quickly realize that they themselves have no substance or personality beyond knowing how to take advantage of the nuances of social situations. When relationships are formed solely from this social tic-tac-toe, they tend to be shallow relationships (shallow meaning with little depth) that either don't last very long or are just plain sh*tty. 1
ThaWholigan Posted June 22, 2012 Posted June 22, 2012 The issue I have with this, and the whole notion of "game," is that people think having "game" is enough...but they quickly realize that they themselves have no substance or personality beyond knowing how to take advantage of the nuances of social situations. When relationships are formed solely from this social tic-tac-toe, they tend to be shallow relationships (shallow meaning with little depth) that either don't last very long or are just plain sh*tty. Legitimate post this Game is a skillset, not a substitute personality.........in my opinion of course .....
Ninjainpajamas Posted June 22, 2012 Posted June 22, 2012 It's a combination of knowledge and attributes that make you effective at gaining the interest of the opposite sex. Some men and women have the ability to peak someones interest, they can feel them out and send out an attractive vibe, and people are attracted to the way they act and what they have to say. ThaWholigan had a pretty good breakdown of some of the attributes these people usually acquire. You don't really see the shy, quiet guy who is skittish every time there is a loud bang and avoids interaction or feels uncomfortable with it. It doesn't make him unattractive to some women, but overall he's not exactly doing anything to peak a woman's interest. It doesn't however mean to me you've got to fake, it just means you understand these elements well. I also look at each man having different advantages and disadvantages. It's like an athlete, all different shapes and sizes, advantages and disadvantages they learned to negotiate and overcome to make them effective, but some have more of a natural ability/talent more than others. So to me It's about improving the attributes and qualities you have and increasing skills in certain areas that know would help you, just because someone improves a skillset or tries to understand something better and implement those qualities within themselves in their own way doesn't mean they are being fake, it means they are improving themselves. I don't see Game as a negative thing, It's not like pick up line or trying to get someone to sleep with you, that's just being aggressive, even too aggressive. And If game is so easily faked then why aren't all men effective at it? because they're too real to accomplish this? I'm actually trying to learn and try to understand more how a lot of men have a lot of trouble with women...because It's not like you need "Game" to find a woman. Most people can appreciate people who are real, genuine and sincere and not trying to or aware of trying to be something else...I can understand that too, and I'm not saying game is about changing who you are. What I am saying though...If you want to play Baseball, you might want to learn how to swing a bat 1
somedude81 Posted June 22, 2012 Posted June 22, 2012 This is exactly what game is. If you don't have it you have to learn it. While you are learning it though you have to fake it til you make it. How the hell can one fake having game?
Meeks7 Posted June 22, 2012 Posted June 22, 2012 How the hell can one fake having game? It's not that hard. Not easy, but not THAT hard. -Smile (not a creepy or awkward smile, so don't overdo it) -Stand up straight and tall (most people don't know they're slouching) -Speak loud and clear, do not mumble or stutter -Believe and act like you're the guy to be with (this one takes more time so you must master the ones above first before you get to this level) It really helps to have an active social life too. Friends add color to life. And you'll have more rich experiences to pull from, and quirky fun stories to share at the drop of a hat. Plus, constant social interaction sharpens your wit and attractiveness. It simply enhances all aspects of life.
USMCHokie Posted June 22, 2012 Posted June 22, 2012 It's not that hard. Not easy, but not THAT hard. -Smile (not a creepy or awkward smile, so don't overdo it) -Stand up straight and tall (most people don't know they're slouching) -Speak loud and clear, do not mumble or stutter -Believe and act like you're the guy to be with (this one takes more time so you must master the ones above first before you get to this level) It really helps to have an active social life too. Friends add color to life. And you'll have more rich experiences to pull from, and quirky fun stories to share at the drop of a hat. Plus, constant social interaction sharpens your wit and attractiveness. It simply enhances all aspects of life. Take a look at your list...these are all things that good guys do without thinking about it. They just DO it...they don't go through a pep talk reminding themselves to do all of these things before walking into a room...they just walk into the room. This is why I call it "fake it til you make it"...if you've gotta consciously think about it, then you're not doing it... Good baseball players don't go through all the steps to swinging a bat each time they step up to the plate...they just step up and swing. Of course, at the end of the day, this just becomes an argument in semantics...we all appear to agree on the basic idea here...
dasein Posted June 22, 2012 Posted June 22, 2012 It's unfortunate that many people spend more time focusing on how to appear to be more desirable rather than focusing on being more desirable... Some people have to start somewhere, with baby steps. Hopefully it sinks in quickly that actuality trumps appearance. Others should be more desirable on paper, but somehow aren't, and can't see why they aren't. For those, a knowledgeable outsider can make a world of difference.
monkey00 Posted June 22, 2012 Posted June 22, 2012 I read a lot of that game stuff when I was younger in college. Honestly It's all hoo-haa mumbo jumbo. The majority of the guys on the forums and and the web are honestly all just keyboard jockeys who preach it but don't practice it or have any 'real game'. I've seen photos of some of the self-proclaimed PUAs, and they look like major geeks honestly. It's a business for these guys and they sell books, the seminars, the classes to make the money. The logistics behind having so called 'game' such as saying the right thing at the right time, physical contact, reading body languages, dressing a certain way, portraying positive body language, etc. is all theory until it becomes who you are. I think men just get better with age, some will get women and some will never figure them out. I find charisma incorporates all of that cohesively. Some argue charisma is innate, and some argue that it can be learned. At the end of the day experience teaches us a lot. Either you go out and date for the sake of dating to gain that experience and get better from women and learn from your mistakes. Or hide at home and wait for the 'one' to show up at your doorstep, by then you'll fumble on all your words and get nervous. As the old adage goes 'just be yourself', hopefully the right girl you meet will be attracted to that. Being a fake doesn't get you anywhere, but practice makes better.
truth_seeker Posted June 22, 2012 Posted June 22, 2012 I hear this a lot on the internet, typical line they say: "Dude, if you have "Game", looks don´t matter" Is having a "Game" a confident natural attitude that most guys don´t have? I have never heard my friends say this, so i wonder what exactly having a "Game" is....? My belief is GAME is your sales pitch. Can you convince a girl to sleep with you? If you can, you got game.
truth_seeker Posted June 22, 2012 Posted June 22, 2012 As the old adage goes 'just be yourself', hopefully the right girl you meet will be attracted to that. Being a fake doesn't get you anywhere, but practice makes better. It depends on the girl you're going for. If you want young and immature, being a game-player is the way to go. If you want someone real, then just be who you are. Depending what you put out there will dictate what kind of women you will attract.
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